11 year old with seperation anxiety

[jaqeeee]

Any ideas my daughter has just all of a sudden started to cry on way to art club so i cant take her in she has been going for a year with her brother ?? And school calling to pick her up as she so upset and when she home she says she misses me ?? Getting quite stressful any ideas

Bullying?

thats what i thought at first but have chatted all ok been going to same school since 4 ??? Shes really missing out on stuff

jaqeeee I immediately wondered about illness or death or anything traumatic too - I remember being like your D - my friend's mum died when I was around her age and I wouldn't let my poor mum out of my sight for months. If she has experienced something like that, it will just take time and lots of reassurance for her to feel secure again.

And don't rule out bullying just because she's been at the same school for years. Things change as children get older; they can turn against each other quite horribly sometimes, and often somebody being bullied is frightened of the repercussions if they tell somebody about it.

Have you tried talking to her brother to see if he can shed any light on what might be happening at school?

Have a no pressure chat when you are alone in the house together

Tell her you are worried that she does not seem so happy. Does she not like lessons? does she not like art club? Reassure her that whatever she tells her, you undertsand that its a problem and you will support no matter how trivial, silly, shameful, bad or hopeless it seems.

If you cannot get a reasonable explanation, or you are unsure how to proceed, take her to GP and talk in general terms that she has been upset at school and you need some help (ie Mental Health Services)with anxiety issues and what do they suggest.

They can be a real help and will reassure her that there are lots of kids in her position

Could be hormones. I have boys but remember DS1 went through a very tearful phase when he started puberty at 11. He would cry at the drop of a hat over such minor things.It was quite out of character and lasted a few months.

My son was like this for a while - couldn't explain why he didn't want to go to school, just was so totally stressed out I couldn't get him through the doors - he was about 12/13. It was a tough time all round and he missed overall about a third of a year of schooling. He had some counselling which seem to really helped, and then he suddenly got OK again and now goes in every day happy as Larry.

We asked the school to send us work that was being missed so we could do it at home so he didn't fall behind. TBH unless she is in GCSE or AS or A level years missing some school won't affect her too much.

Hope she is OK soon.