My DS1 is 17 and has just got his AS level results. He came home after collecting his results but didn't have any paperwork with him. He said one of his friends had them in his bag and he'd forgotten to get them back.
He told me that he'd got three C grades (He dropped maths a couple of months ago so only took three exams) and these grades were good enough to carry on and do the A Levels. I said it was important to get the certificates back from his friend and he said he would. Anyway, days later still no paperwork so I asked when he could go and get it and he said he'd ring the friend. Still no paperwork. He then said he couldn't get hold of him. I said to DP half jokingly "Next he'll tell us he's on holiday." As predicted, he's on holiday! I asked DS1 if he was being honest about his results and he said he was but the excuses for not getting the certificates home aroused my suspicion.
Anyway, today I received a letter from college stating that DS1 does not have to attend on enrolment day and that they'd like me to come in for a meeting the day after enrolment to see if they can find a course for DS1. It said that by now I would know that his results/attendance mean that he can not automatically progress into the second year. If they offered him a place then it would be on a probationary basis and he'd be reviewed by the Principle monthly. At the bottom it said "I would also suggest that X investigates employment or courses at other colleges and schools in case we are unable to offer him a course in September 2010."
I phoned but could only talk to someone in the exam department as they won't be fully staffed until next Tuesday. She told me his results were not all Cs as DS1 had claimed. He got a C for media, C for drama and a D for English.
Not sure what to do. Last year was awful with letters arriving monthly complaining about late coursework, not being fully equipped for lessons, not turning up for lessons, messing around in class. Each time he had an excuse. He said their system was slow and that the issue had been resolved, the teacher was mental, they had him confused with another student and various other reasons why we should just ignore the letters.
We went in for a meeting and he admitted that he wasn't working as hard as he could have been but promised to turn over a new leaf. I asked the teacher we had the meeting with not to send any more letters home as they just caused upset as DS1 denied all responsibility so was pointless. She said she'd keep in touch via phone calls and DS1 signed an agreement to attend all lessons. I thought things were fine now but having received this letter today they're clearly not.
DS1 isn't here today and won't be home until after 10pm so I can't talk to him about this yet. Today I've swung between anger and tears. I'm furious/upset that he lied about his results and that he had a place for next year. I can't go through another year like last year and feel that it's time he got a full time job and moved out. We've had money go missing and have to lock our bedroom door. He's rude and only talks to us politely when he wants money or a lift or something.
I'm just wondering if anyone else has been in a similar situation and how they handled it. Please don't suggest we all sit down and discuss this as it doesn't help if one person round the table won't be straight down the line. Also, not helped by him saying "This conversation is over" when he's asked a direct question he doesn't want to answer.