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Does surrogacy have to be a formal process or can you simply just get pregnant?

13 replies

Nicki282 · 16/08/2016 22:11

Not asking for any specific reason just wondering.

Does a surrogate have to go through a formal process or is it as easy as going to the doctors when pregnant and saying your carrying it for someone else?

OP posts:
SouthPole · 09/09/2016 20:54

Yes, it is as simple as that.

There's a lot more to it, obviously!

2 time surro here.

AppleJac · 09/09/2016 20:55


allthecarbs · 09/09/2016 20:58

You take the pregnancy on as your own I think.

If using your own eggs that baby is legally yours until you sign to hand it over after birth.

Sorry for being nosey but is it something you are doing? I've always wanted to but dh hates the idea of it. It's an amazing gift.

caroldecker · 09/09/2016 21:32

AFAIK, even if not your own eggs, the baby is legally yours (in the UK) and the surrogate mother can claim maintenance from the father.

SouthPole · 12/09/2016 21:48

Both my surrogate babies were nothing to do with me genetically but my husband and I are their legal parents until the Parental Order is granted (6 weeks to 6 months after birth).

And THAT is why Wills of both surrogate and husband and the Intended Parents are so important...

Lumdeedums · 09/10/2016 15:59

Also a two times surrogate and have been both TS (used my eggs) and GS (IVF. No relation) and although there is t masses of laws surrounding surrogacy it does have to be formal and done correctly.
Surrogates in the UK, TS or GS are the legal mothers and their husband or civil partner are the legal second parent. In order for the Intended Parwnts to get legal responsibility of their child and the surrogates rights extinguished, they get a Parental Order.
You need to have an agreement outlining intentions of all. This covers pretty much everything from testing to termination, loss to wat to do upon the birth.
Though not legally binding it's needed usually by cafcass who investigate to write a report for the court for the PO.
You also need life insurance for the surrogate for 2 years for £200,000 or so.
Def not something you should just 'wing'.

Hilary37 · 05/05/2017 18:33

Hello all
Myself and my husband have found a surrogate and we have decided between the three of us to enter into this privately ie without going through an agency or paying a lawyer £600 plus!
We have however looked into the legal implications and are fully informed and aware.
We would however like our surrogate to attend some counselling before we begin as we are going to everything we can to support her along the way.
I am finding it difficult to find a counsellor willing to speak to her as we are not connected to a fertility clinic. Reason being because we are going to attempt 3 home insenimations before going to iui.
Can anyone help with finding a private counsellor?

Lots of love and luck to all!

talithaandrew · 21/11/2017 06:07

Yes! It's as simple as that. Even though there’s a lot to it obviously but you care for the unborn child as your own. In some parts of the world like the U.K, the surrogate can actually demand maintenance of the baby from the father if need be. Being a surrogate is an amazing gift it’s a bit melancholy but that’s life. Hope I answered your question sufficiently. Best of luck!

AnnJo84 · 28/11/2017 02:12

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ignislime · 17/12/2017 06:49

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Mummmmyyyy · 06/12/2021 22:33

Hi, does anyone know the best UK surrogate groups to interact with surrogates?

What about abroad? Has anyone done this abroad?

Motherdare · 06/12/2021 22:57

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FertileGround · 30/05/2022 15:56

If you want to go abroad you should work with an agency that has experience with it because the laws can be so different.

Some people prefer abroad because the IPs are the legal parents from birth in some countries. Your baby can also potentially have citizenship form that country as well which can open up more options to the child as an adult.

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