Should I go to rehab ?

[Namechangemewchow]

There’s a long backstory but basically I’m a 49 year old woman who’s had enough. I can’t get myself out of the routine of drinking. Over 100 units a week. I’ve tried to stop and I can’t. I’ve had lots of traumatic events happen over the last few years and this has exacerbated the problem. I’m depressed, anxious and unhappy even when on the face of it I should be grateful for everything I have - fantastic children, a good job, new house and money in the bank. I feel that a completely new environment would help me to recover and just feel better in general.
I’ve found a rehab abroad which has been recommended and is significantly cheaper that the UK. I could afford to go though it would be a decent chunk of my savings. Work would be fine - I could get a fit note for 4-6wks. However I’m worried about leaving my children. I’m not sure what they would think or how it would affect them.
Should I keep trying to muster up the willpower and do it myself. 1000’s people do. Or should I bite the bullet and get more info ?

I think rehab is a good option for someone who has tried to stop drinking multiple times and is relapsing. I would however suggest that you contact your local substance misuse services and see what they have available. They may have links with rehabs around this country which may be a cheaper (however often longer waiting lists) option. Looking at what your triggers are is very important as if coming back to your environment after rehab, could this be a trigger for you and potential risk of relapse? I would also say that you need to have a look at what after care support is available for afterwards to help you maintain the changes you've made. This could be 1:1 relapse prevention work and groups. This is vital in helping you to maintain the changes. Good luck!

Hi OP, I’m sorry you’re struggling. Admitting you need help is a huge step so for that- well done.

How long have you been drinking for, and what support do you have? Particularly for your mental health?

Rehab is a great idea to kick start the process and get that initial sober phase done but the bigger challenge would be staying sober once you are back in your own environment, if nothing changes. If you can identify why you drink, for example if it is linked to your depression or anxiety, and you don’t put support in places or make changes to deal with those things long term then my worry would be you spend the time at rehab and are successful but then fall back into the same routine once you are home.

Genuinely I wouldn’t worry about your children assuming they have someone reliable and loving to take care of them for that period of time. They will be far less damaged by a few weeks with a friend/family than by spending the rest of their lives with you struggling like this.

Good luck! X

IMHO 6 weeks isn't long enough, especially if you will be returning home after you have completed rehab.

Changing long-term entrenched behaviour takes a very long time. I would recommend contacting your local substance misuse service. Ask them about detox and talking therapies. See what they can offer in terms of short term and long term support. Find out what charities in the area work with addiction.

Stopping is relatively easy. Staying stopped is much more difficult.

My dad died of alcoholism in his early 50s. I would have given anything for him to be open to going to rehab. We would have paid. Losing him forever when I was young was much more damaging than if he’d gone away for a month or two and gotten the tools to get better. I wish you all the best OP.

Absolutely this! Local addiction services can usually arrange funding for one stay at rehab/detox. What is most important though is that you are open to engaging with groups and 1-1 support, it is vital to maintain sobriety, and will help you understand why you drink, triggers, future coping mechanisms for when life throws you stress, and relapse and prevention techniques.
you deserve to be free of the alcohol. I hope you seek help xxx

I think your first call should be to your GP - I am not sure what the threshold for withdrawal is but if you are drinking large amounts consistently everyday it may cause an issue if you stop cold turkey. You could require a detox first. Lots of substance programs run out patient as well, and can provide long-term support compared to a rehab. This might help you put better coping mechanisms in place if you are interacting with them alongside your daily life and triggers, rather than an isolated intense burst which then might be hard to incorporate into day-to-day life.

Forgot to say OP. Good luck! Be kind to yourself, because you deserve kindness and a life where you don’t feel burdened by this.

Are you already engaging in services here? Some people think rehab is a fix all, but unless you have a long term plan to address the route causes and face up to changes that need to be made all it will do is dry you out temporarily