Husband post addiction

[Hello1989]

I have posted on this before but in short my husband went to a rehab this summer for a mental breakdown and weed addiction. He was emotionally abusive during this time and quite honestly it was the worst time of my life. I had to keep it together for our 22 month old daughter. However he really did turn a massive corner about 5 months ago not only with how sorry he was etc but he’s been sober of both drugs and alcohol. So I am happy he’s come this far. The issue I have is that he is still very depressed. I just found out I’m pregnant and struggling with his negative moods. I have said to him it would be nice to have a smile in tbe
morningssometimes (it seems to be very grumpy and ‘off’ in the morning but gets better in the day) but we are 5 months in and it’s just constant. I notice he does it to his family too but not our daughter which is a positive. Everyone comments on how one worded and grumpy he is. I feel he misses booze and drugs and is failing to see all he has in life but I end up snapping because I’m just sick of being someone who is so low. We’re also only mid 30s so I’m like is this what it wkkk be rest of my life. Do I leave in a couple years after 2nd baby is born and I’m back to work? So many concerns

I’m not looking for advice on leaving or money just if anyone else has experienced similar after addiction

I’m honestly really confused as to why you’re adding a second baby to the mix. Is he on board with this?

I think if he’s so low and it’s not being addressed it’s a massive risk and only a matter of time til he relapses. Has he engaged in any new activities, hobbies, etc that will give him that rush he needs?

DP goes to the gym a few times a week now, volunteers and maybe twice a week goes on a big drive with very loud music. It seems to work for him.

He needs to seek therapy/counselling.
Whilst giving up drink/drugs is brilliant & should definitely be acknowledged as a huge achievement, life is still life.
Whatever he was trying to escape or numb with substances doesn't magically disappear.
He needs to address the why.
I think if hes not willing to do that, then you need to leave, for your sake & the children's.

He does weekly therapy and speaks to his psychiatrist once a month, he is taking his meds goes to yoga and running every day etc so he is trying but its incredibly hard the moods I find more than anything. Think I was looking for others dealing with depression in husbands and if it gets better or go through bouts etc, also how to not let it affect you. I find I try and stay out his way in the mornings

I would think twice about a second baby, unless you are in an immediate position to support yourself and your children without him

Rehab etc isn't the magic wand everyone perceives it to be people don't come out of rehab into a life of rainbows and fairies they come back on to real life with all the same issues and less coping mechanisms it can take days to years for some to feel normal life around them he is five months in and now has extra stress of another baby and by sounds of it partner with unrealistic expectations try talking to him and asking him what he needs and listening to the answer and actually do something with the answers