How to talk to an addict to get them to understand....

[Bumblebee907]

Hello,

I am specifically looking for the advice from people who have struggled with addiction issues.

I have a relative with addiction issues, who is trying to get on top of it, but regularly enables their own behaviour by making excuses, often resorting to "alcohol,* is the worst* of them all" arguments. I don't disagree that alcohol addiction is a massive problem! But it's almost used next to excuse their own problem.

I want to continue to be supportive and encouraging, and I'm really looking for any words of wisdom from people who've been on the other side, but recovered, about what to say.

They are highly intelligent, And so that seems to make it worse somehow, because they always think they can out-think the addiction.

I am sorry you are going through this, Bumblebee.
Unfortunately there is nothing anyone can do to stop an addict using or drinking - the addict has to want to stop.
I recommend you go to an Al Anon meeting - you will find help and support there.

I am also intelligent and it was hard as so much of the information is made so agonisingly simple. I was in one therapy session where the group had to discuss calories, another where we were made to come up with ways alcohol could damage our bodies - but asked of us in a way that indicated they truly thought we didn't know this (which some didn't).
It also meant I could outthink the rehab therapists, understand what they were saying in seconds and repeat with added information. I believe I was fairly insufferable 🤦🏻‍♀️. But that's the way I am..
I can't offer much advice except the addict needs to come to the conclusion that they need to stop. They need to want to stop. Please tell them that you cannot outwit addiction, you can be highly intelligent but addiction does not care, in fact this feeds into the addiction and increases its hold on you. Use the intelligence to stop.