Giving up alcohol

[Icandothisnow]

Morning, I’ve been following posts in this group and all the inspirational stories and tips posted to help people who are struggling. I have been struggling. I decided I needed to stop drinking alcohol not just for my own health, but for my family too. So on Friday I tipped the left over wine down the sink and had 0% alcohol Gordon’s gin and tonic. I didn’t miss my wine at all.

Yesterday we went out for a family tea and I had one glass of wine. That was it. And I didn’t get any wine from the shop on the way home. Today I’m going to send my DH to the shops for groceries with strict instructions not to bring any wine back. I did a 5km run yesterday and today to help with my health.

I struggled to get to sleep both nights. My legs were very twitchy and I couldn’t get comfortable. I’m hoping this will change with the exercise and later bed time. I was falling asleep some nights at 8pm and up from 1am with very bad anxiety and a racing heart. I daren’t say how much I was drinking but it was a lot each day over a very long period of time.

I’m determined to make permanent changes so I thought I’d post here for accountability. For now I’m going to focus on not drinking wine, and keeping up the exercise, before looking at my diet. I have a milestone birthday in about 16 months time so that is going to be my focus. I could cry thinking how much money I have wasted on wine and family time I have missed due to drinking. We had such a lovely night last night and I’m determined to do this - hence this post.

Day 3 today and it’s a Sunday. It will be tough as it’s gorgeous outside - perfect wine weather. But I won’t. I’ll keep busy and start the back to school prep. Wish me luck, and if I get the wine wobbles I’ll post here instead.

You can do it. We're here for you!

Thank you. I’m doing lots to keep me busy and hopefully west myself out for tonight. Run dibs, ironing done, lunch done, one load of washing on the line, one almost ready to go out. Hopefully I can distract myself until around 8pm as that’s when I have generally gone past wanting any wine.

Well, Ive got to the end of day 3 with no wine, and none in the house to tempt me. I’ve done lots of washing, stripped and made 2 beds and my DH has made a very nice black lentil dhal for tea. It’s such a nice evening tonight - usually I’d be sat in the sun drinking wine. But not tonight.

Hi @Icandothisnow
Well done!! Keep going! Keep us updated x

A lot, but over a long period of time each day. That’s why I didn’t realise how much I was drinking. Some days I’d start at 2pm and drink until around 8pm, other days I might start earlier or later dependant on what I was or wasn’t doing. It was only wine though. Nothing stronger. I have no idea, other than reading inspirational posts on mumsnet, what made me decide to slow down. I guess reading what people do in the evenings that I was missing out on. Hence the nice meal out last night and family meal at home tonight. I’m not aiming at this stage to stop completely. I will do eventually but if I say never again then the first time I slip
up I’ll give up. Whereas if I cut down significantly I can get over it and carry on abstaining the very next day. The zero alcohol G and T’s are helping though! It’s now 8.15pm and I’m not craving a glass of wine at all.

Thank you! I will. Day 3 done now and hopefully day 4 tomorrow.

How are you doing OP?

Thank you for asking. I had a glass of wine last night, just one, and much later than I would normally have one. We had a lovely evening sat outside as a family rather than me going to bed early. I’ve decided no more wine until Friday - we are going out for lunch so I’ll allow myself one glass, and no more. It’s nice that I am managing to control it rather than caving in like I would do. We had an issue with one of my older children yesterday that would ordinarily have sent me running for the wine. I’m pleased I managed to control it.

I need to watch what I’m eating though. I wasn’t going to at this point but I’m eating more and I feel bloated. I’ll up my water intake to see if that helps, rather than having diet drinks and 0% alcohol G and T’s!

That sounds pretty cool and controlled under the circumstances of life!

I feel like those able to moderate whilst remaining very conscious of the dangers, if you like, are very fortunate and can have that one glass without slipping down a slope.

As for the bloating, that's par for the course I think when we stop or cut down as our bodies adjust. My weight fluctuates so much I can look a little size 10 one day and a 14 the next depending on how many carbs I've eaten and where my hormones are situated so don't worry about that too much.

Hi OP - I'm well over 100 days alcohol free, having ditched it back in May. I didn't intend for it to be permanent having been through many months alcohol free is years gone by, however this time it feels definitive. I don't think I'll ever go back. I also recognize that moderation doesn't work for me. What starts as "a few drinks on Friday" turns in many drinks 4 days a week after a few months.

Highly recommend the following reads to support in the coming days:

The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober
Sunshine Warm Sober
This Naked Mind
The Sober Diaries

Great supportive tools and really help solidify a desire to enjoy sobriety.

I didn't have any struggle quitting, other than reimagining my overly romanticized view of alcohol - the sundowners at a beach bar after work on Friday afternoon, the first beer at the airport before a flight, the pre-game G&T before a night out. All of those activities have been just as fun (if not more!) sober. Mainly because I remember them, don't have anxiety about it, don't feel gross the next day, sleep brilliantly and am now living my best life. I've discovered non-alc alternatives that more than foot the bill, from adaptogenic elixirs to zero % beer.

The r/stopdrinking Reddit thread is also a great help if you need.

Good luck!

Thank you, I am sure I won’t always be this controlled and will slip up at some point. my goal ATM is to cut down as much as I can, if I slip up I’ll just have to accept it and not let it defeat me. Get straight back on to AF the next day. Having thought about everything I think I would fail at day 1 if I said I’m never drinking again. Because I have changed my decision from having no alcohol at all, to just a glass (not bottles) if I want one, it’s made me more likely to say no. I’m on day 5 now with only 2 glasses of wine during that time. I’m really proud of myself as usually it would be many, many bottles over the same period of time.

I haven’t done my 5km run today though as I’ve been working, kids back in school, after school appts/driving etc. it’s too hot to do it now but I might get up early tomorrow morning to do it. It’s only 45 mins out of my whole day and it will make me feel good.

I’ve noticed a change in some health issues as well. Positive changes which are spurring me on. It’s early days but I’m determined to be as healthy as I can be in time for an important holiday and milestone birthday, as well as healthy for my family. My Fitbit stress and sleeping stats are also improving!

Hi, I’m on day 7 now of my huge cut back. I had one glass of wine yesterday (so 3 now over 7 days) and I then had zero alcohol G and T’s. I’m sorely tempted now to have a glass of wine as I’ve finished work for the week!

however, I need to do a 5km run to keep up my fitness. I haven’t done one for 2 days and my goal was to do it every day. It’s a bit cooler today so that might be my motivation to have one glass later on if I still fancy it. My Fitbit is showing ever improving stats which I’m delighted with.

Urgh, gave in last night and had quite a few glasses of wine. Woke up with a horrible furry feeling in my mouth and feeling very annoyed with myself. I’m not going to give up though - back on AF today and I’m going to stick with Diet Coke at our lunch out today.

thank you for the book recommendations. I have only just seen them so will download one of them today.

I definitely second quit lit suggestions. I found Alcohol Explained by William Porter very helpful to change my mindset around drinking. Prior to reading that I had always had tried to rely on willpower over something I wanted - reading it stopped me wanting to drink in the same way.

Thank you. I’m on holiday today so that can be my lunchtime reading. I’ve tipped the rest of my wine away so I’m not tempted and got my zero alcohol G and T’s in the fridge ready for tonight. Day 8 today with only one major slip up. Im not going to start at day 1 again.

Got through day 9 (a Friday!) with only one small glass of wine at lunch as we went out. Nothing afterwards. Normally I would have had up to 2 bottles as it’s my day off/the weekend/beautiful weather etc. really struggled to sleep (ended up taking sleeping tablets to help). My legs were twitchy and it was so hot. Tired when I woke up but not groggy/hung over which is fab. Let’s see how day 10 goes today. I’m determined not to have any wine.

so, 4 glasses of wine in 9 days. Less than 1 bottle. I have cut down enormously and I’m so proud of myself to get this far. And I’ve saved so much money. I might start putting my saved wine money to one side each day to see just how much I was wasting on it.

And just to kick my bum into gear and burn off those wine calories from yesterday I’ve just done my 5km run and got a pb for it!

@Icandothisnow how are you now?

How’s it going , I’m on day 1 today , been heavy heavy drinker all
my adult life . I don’t want total abstinence but be able to have a drink now and again without drinking daily as I always have done . Read all posts on here and just think I can do this