Scared booze - help!

[KEG973]

I don’t know how it’s happened but I’m up to drinking roughly a bottle of wine a night.
I have a wonderful life, husband, kids and yet every night I down a bottle of wine, expensive wine but that is merely to assuage my guilt.

how do I beat this? Anyone been there

Yes. In my 20’s probably a bit worse than you actually in terms of units.
9/10 units a day is likely to give you some mild withdrawal symptoms so I wouldn’t stop dead. Also wine is deadly in that it’s Moreish ( especially good wine! ) so we’ll need a game plan to reduce this down. I would stop buying wine altogether and get either a couple of bottles of lager or fruity cider which are between 2-3 units each and enjoy those instead for two weeks. You can probably then go cold Turkey from the 6 units without feeling rough. Mentally, you’ll find you’re swinging from euphoria and self approval of cutting down to feeling grumpy and irritated. You’ll probably find you get a witching hour (6-7pm for me ) when the craving to drink is really intense. Plan to be busy during that time, walk the dog, go to the gym, deadhead the lavenders, paint a doorframe… whatever. But don’t sit idly where you normally do to have a drink.
I used to drink to cope with anxiety and it got out of hand. I now enjoy an occasional scotch or red wine in a my chair while I’m reading/ playing music etc.
its okay, you can do this. At this stage it’s just a bad habit , it’s not a lifestyle and it’s completely reversible!
book a spa day or a mini break with the cash you save aswell.

thank you so much for taking the time to respond. It’s so encouraging to know someone else has been there and now has a healthy relationship with alcohol.,

How long did it take you to regain control?

switching from wine to something less strong and tasty is a great idea, this is all scary as it has been a crutch for a long time for me

Similar. I'm down to drinking half to 3/4 a night.

I buy the little botts so it's not there to drink more. Expensive but worth it. I have the odd af night too. Trying to increase those.

Same. I now just do this on Fri and sat and it's so much better as I end up actually feeling tipsy now (which I like) whereas I had an annoying tolerance before . Ive bought CBD drink called TRIP instead and have with ice. Takes the edge off the craving as it relaxes you like wine does. Does the trick for me. Oh and I go to the gym Mon- Thursday 7-8 which is the time is used to reach for the bottle

@KEG973 i found it easy to cut down initially , but there were certain triggers like stressful days and boredom that would make me falter at times. The thing is, after just days of going into the alcohol free break period you notice yourself looking and feeling much better which can be a real motivator. It was probably a year before I could be trusted with a bottle of wine or spirit in the house without over indulging though so keeping a limited stash of a couple beers or something and allocating one or two treat nights is probably essential until then.
there’s no magic to it , it’s just about keeping busy to overcome the urges and finding a replacement activity to help you relax.
take up some sort of craft / hobby and settle down to it when the booze gremlin starts whispering in your ear and you’ll win most nights.

Can you fill your evenings with something different? I quit cold turkey, but what helped was making myself nice AF drinks. I signed up for an AF subscription box, but most larger supermarkets will have a bit AF drinks section. I did a lot of tonics with AF gin, lots of ice and fancy garnishes. Now I often have a Corona Cero while cooking dinner.

And then during the times when I would usually want a drink, I filled my brain with something else. I listened to a podcast (there are loads out there about stopping drinking) or I dumped the children with my husband and went on a walk or did some gardening.

I also got support. There are lots of 30 no drinking things out there. Bee Sober has a 30 day AF experiment. I think there is one with This Naked Mind as well. Or there is a guy on Instagram called Sober Dave who does a live every night during Dry January. You can go back and listen to each of those, one each night, to get you through a month.

Have a look at the Sobermummy blog or Claire Pooley's book 'the sober diaries'. William Porter's 'Alcohol Explained' is also a really useful read. Reading the latter stopped me wanting to drink. Reading the former helped me understand better what alcohol did to my body. Reading the former helped me understand some of the bumps in the road from a more practical point of view.
Nearly 10 months without drinking now and I am much happier, sleep better, less anxious, run faster and thinner than I was