I'm addicted to the internet

[Blinkonce]

I know this is what everyone says but I am addicted to the internet/devices and it is ruining my life. I've tried so many times to come off it, I've got rid of computers and phones, got my husband to block things on devices and tried several blocking apps. I wish I could just not have it at all but so much of life is internet based now. For example I got an old brick phone, but I miss out on WhatsApp family and friends groups, and I can't send my parents photos of my baby so I got a phone and now am back on it, scrolling mindlessly for hours and hours a day. I put a blocker on my laptop which is great but any phone internet blocking apps can be pretty easily overridden, I download them but then get desperate and find out how to uninstall etc. Id like to not have internet at all but Im a new mum and it's great to find friends on or new groups, but I spend hours a day scrolling, I just can't help myself. My husband just says to have some self control but I can't, I actually feel like I am deeply addicted and I can't help myself. He asks me why I go on it so much and it's because it numbs everything, I don't have to think about anything,I can just absorb it and feel blank. I honestly feel like it's like a drug or alcohol addiction, I can't help myself and often find sneaky ways to get around anything my husband has put in place to stop me from looking at it

It's been like this for almost 20 years and I have wasted so much of my life. At one point a few years ago due to living in a random place I couldn't get internet and I was so unbelievably creative I did so much exciting stuff, but then I moved and got the internet again and that all stopped. Having a baby helped but I'm on my phone whenever I'm breastdeeding and also when she's playing and I feel so crap and guilty about it. Please does anyone have any advice? How can I stop using something that is so integral to daily life? Should I just go completely old school and not have the internet, or devices? but then I'm out of the loop for finding out about new mum things and speaking to friends and family. I just feel so desperate to change things. I just wish it didn't exist.

Hi @Blinkonce . I'm sorry you're struggling with this. I too love my phone and watch YouTube, tik tok and other random shit but I work full time so obviously have long breaks away from it and it's mainly evenings and weekends in-between housework etc. I don't really have much advice apart from have you tried setting a timer? I think it's perfectly reasonable to scroll your phone when you're breastfeeding but after that maybe switch it off and have a job to do or go out with your baby, just so you're getting regular breaks. When you're on it, set a timer and when that times up, either turn it off, give it to your husband or put it out of sight. See if you can wean yourself off it for prolonged periods. I know it's easier said than done though but you've proved you can do it before and get creative again! You just need to break the habit. When your baby is toddling around, you'll need to have your wits about you and not have your head buried in your phone so try and think about your baby who I'm sure you love deeply so you're doing it for them 😊.

Thank you @Livebythecoast I will try timers but I think I will probably ignore them when the time comes, I just can't help myself. I have no self control. I feel like I need to go cold turkey but how to do that when live is so Internet based? I have broken the habit before but always get back into it after a while. I really wish it didn't exist!

My husband tries to help but I end up lying to him about it or hiding what I'm doing.

@Blinkonce ah okay. It does sound like you're going to have to get some professional help then maybe?. Ironically you'll need to Google (or get your husband to) as I've had a quick look and there's lots of help out there or you could try hypnotherapy?. Sorry I haven't been any help but I hope you manage to find something that works for you and wish you all the very best.

Op I get you. I have often felt like this, always pick up the phone every time there is a gap of doing nothing, it's such a bad habit.

Instead of saying your addicted to the internet, think of it like you're addicted to communication and information. I feel like I do it to escape somewhat and in an age where the answer to anything is at the tip of your fingers it's easy to just check your phone for the solution to boredom, loneliness etc

I don't know the answer because I struggle myself but I do know I'm better when I'm surrounded by people or have been out the house more. Try and get to the root cause of why you have this need to constantly be reading stuff or scrolling. It's a mind numbing activity for me which might mean I need to find other ways to escape and relax

You can't avoid the internet or communication so I'd avoid trying all the timers and apps, try and get to the bottom of why

Good luck

To add... maybe start a diary and log every time you pick up your phone for a random scroll. What were you doing at that time? What were your emotions?

I found myself doing it straight after a falling out with my teen the other day, it was so inherent that I must have been trying to mentally escape for a bit

I know this is a fairly old post but I can totally relate to what you’re going through. It’s funny how that if you said to people that you had a, for example, alcohol addiction then they’d take your problem seriously. I don’t think that someone that claim to have a drug or overeating addiction would be told to just “have some self control”, they’d be encouraged to get professional help.

I would advice going on Internet and technology addicts anonymous (ITAA) and observe a few online meetings as a spectator and also read the information available on there. You’re not alone in this. It’s a real addiction and there is help to get xxx

internetaddictsanonymous.org/guide-for-newcomers/

Here is the link!

You can get a box that locks your phone in, and it's impossible to get out till the timer is finished.

Me too! Following.

I sympathise. I've started leaving ohone and laptop downstairs when I go up for bath and bed. It just puts a barrier there so they aren't the last and first things I do each day. It's hard though, and it is SUCH a waste of time.