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Drinking partner

4 replies

Jewel1234 · 15/01/2021 16:50

Just looking for a second option really .
Long story trying to make short .
Just over 6 years ago I lost my partner to alcoholism. Life was hard for all concerned .
New chapter I started a relationship just over 2 years ago with a pleasant chap he treated us well said all the right things and I started to really like him . I have 2 children at home 18 and 11 and he has one of 17 . He works away 2 weeks out of every month and although I found it strange at first we got into a rountine where by when he came home he would stay at my house one night and one night at his . He had always had a glass of red wine when he stays sometimes I join him sometimes not but what I have noticed he had started drinking more and he gets very argumentative after a few ,not majorly but enough to be annoying . My daughter seems to get the brunt end if it ! Where by he will pick on her faults as being too needy of me . Her being silly with her dog . And he would rather not do things with my family if we go shopping he doesn’t really want them to come . If we go for a walk he would rather it be just him and me . Any thoughts on going forward or am I fighting a losing battle . If all come to a head last night when my daughter said she doesn’t like him coming round when he’s had a drink . And I feel for her . She must feel like old times again . I know she’s ola enough to do her own thing but she shouldn’t feel uncomfortable in her own home no matter what age .

OP posts:
Fatherbrownsbicycle · 15/01/2021 19:15

If we go for a walk he would rather it be just him and me

So he doesn’t want to spend time with your children, picks faults with your DD, is drinking more and being argumentative. That’s not a relationship I’d want to continue. It sounds like he just wants to be in a relationship with a single adult rather than be a family man. Does his 17 year old live with their DM? Your oldest could move out in a year or two but 11 year old will be home for many years yet. They shouldn’t have to spend time/live with someone who’s going to be picking faults with them for the next decade or so until they also leave home. Sorry Flowers

Jewel1234 · 15/01/2021 19:44

Thank you for replying your right , he didn’t really want a family . But a family I have and I don’t want my daughter having to leave home because of him .

OP posts:
OverTheRubicon · 15/01/2021 20:07

He sounds awful, drinking problem or not. Like you say, this is not an ok home environment for your daughter, unless you want her to end up in the same situation, you need to give her an example of good boundaries - he sorts himself and his attitude out, or he leaves.

Jewel1234 · 15/01/2021 21:11

Thank you

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