My son smokes weed, he lies about it, he's stolen from us in the past. He knows how much I hate it, my DH is disapproving but not angry like I am. This evening, I went out to the conservatory to find it locked from the outside, the keys were in the lock, I knocked on the window to get DS to open it up and I could smell that he had been smoking weed in our back garden. I feel so disrespected. He knows how much I hate it and worry about him and he did it under our noses. Last year, we went on holiday without him, he stayed at home and our neighbour said she could smell weed coming over the fence, she had her kids out playing in the back garden. If it was every now and again, at the weekend or the odd party, I wouldn't mind so much, but I think it's all the time, I don't know because he lies. I know a lot of slack has been given about weed since I was a teen, but he is just so unmotivated, he looks like a tramp, he dropped out of Uni and is currently temping, doing very few hours a week. I am so disappointed with him and I don't know what to do. I lost my DD to cancer when she was 5, his older sister, and his younger brother, my youngest is severely disabled, it makes me angry because he's intelligent and gregarious and he's just pissing his life up the wall, it makes me angry because his sister and brother will never have the chances he has. I just feel worn out with it, usually, I'd flip out and have a go, but tonight, I just told my husband to turn the internet off. I don't know what to do anymore and it seems to be the norm for him. He's 20 in a few months, he's an adult, I'm sick of treating him like a kid, I wish he would grow up and be more responsible. We don't give him money, he doesn't sign on, but I know he has stolen from us in the past. Right now, I'm angry and want to kick him out as he really doesn't care about what we think. He was the most well behaved child, he hated the thought of even being told off at school, we had to leave Elf at the cinema when Buddy was put in jail, he couldn't bear the thought of it, but it was like a lightbulb went off when he went to college, he seems to think, "what actually can you do about it?".