Wedding: should I put something on my head?

[whittywan]

DH and I are going to a family (his family not mine) wedding in 2 week's time and as a foreigner I am REALLY not sure about the etiquette rules regarding hats etc. Where I come from virtually no one wears one (I have only ever seen them being worn at the races at home) but having been to a few weddings here in the past few years I have noticed that they seem pretty standard.

The wedding is a very trendy one in the centre of London and I will be wearing this. My accessories include gold and bone bangles and some lovely sandals.

I have long hair with a fringe which I will tie up as I will be carrying my 20 week old DS around and do not relish the thought of pulled/chewed hair . (We are bf and I have practised pulling my boob out the top of the dress . And will be using a Bebe Au Lait cover)

My question is really whether I should put something on my head? And if so do any of you have any ideas?

I am fashion and style inept so will really appreciate advice.

Imo a hat is only really necessary if the ceremony is in a religious place where it would definitely be expected.

(however, I am not known for my helpful contributions on this part of the board! )

Yup - the ceremony is being held in a CofE church.

i've been to a ton of weddings and 99% of them have been in church - some have been catholic ceremonies, and i have NEVER worn a hat!

i'm not comfortable wearing them and therefore think that will show.

hope that helps! (enjoy the wedding)

I am sure it would say on the invitation if it was absolutely expected. Ime (I have attended many CofE weddings) there will be no problem if you don't wear a hat.

Thanks OhCobblers and onepiece. Is it generally expected to wear one, though? (Would just like to know what the convention is - at least then I can confidently flaunt it, IYSWIM?)

I don't think it is generally expected in most CofE churches. However you could always ask the bride/mother of bride. It may be that she comes from a traditional family background and if loads of her aunts, female relatives etc will be wearing hats then perhaps you would feel more comfortable if you fitted in?

Right, so I spoke to the mother of the bride and they will all be wearing hats/fascinators and it sounds like it it is pretty much expected.

Can anyone help with some ideas?

One of my neighbour's daughter married last year in a CofE church with 175 guests, and of them 3 wore a hat!
(The wedding was described by another neighbour as 'pukka' !)

My brother's church wedding later in the year and I won't be wearing a hat or fascinator, although I remember always wearing one in the 80's when I seemed to go to loads of weddings ...

Your dress is gorgeous!

Thanks Downdog

I wouldn't worry about a hat for a CofE or Catholic church. The family might be wearing them because it adds to the sense of occasion, but I doubt they'd really expect everyone else to do the same. Anyway, I don't think it would go with your dress (which is lovely, by the way) unless you wore a big floppy Bianca Jagger style hat.

But if you reckon you'd feel more comfortable with a bit of headgear, accessorise usually do lots of embellished headbands / Alice bands which could work with an up-do, and are a bit more sleek than a typical fascinator.

don't bother. even if you are the only woman without a hat, which I seriously doubt, no one is going to say anything. Your dress doesn't really lend itself to a hat/pointless bit of finery anyway.

NB I would also take a wrap or something -it's not really the done thing to have bare arms in a church imho