I used to be pretty. Now I am dead rough. It all happened so quickly and i feel really bloody pissed off about it.

[swottybetty]

so now i am sulking.

bloody children. only two and a half years ago i looked lovely. then i had two kids i look awful.

fat obvs with rubbish boobs. i used to have ace boobs.

bad clothes cause no cash.

skin hair etc all shit.

feel very old and haggered.

it all happened so quick and i shall prob never be pretty again and i feel so rubbish.

aitch - i have highlights - I'm not sure about bf dd when i'm sitting under the dryer with all those chemicals on my head! (i started the highlights when i was pregnant cos i felt so frumpy - now i'm wishing i'd stuck with just dying my hair at home - that was more managable!)

stayfrosty - thats good advice - i keep thinking oh i'll chop my hair into a funky bob - then i realise this may result in me having to go out without it all straightened and styled and that would make me feel poo

Look on the bright side. Our mothers generation was middle aged after having kids but many of us are still babes at this stage and for many years beyond.

Fake tan, lush body and hair products etc cheaper than ever before and available everywhere including supermarket or online. Hair straighteners - instant boost.

Women have an array of tricks at their disposal - high heels, flattering clothes etc that can disguise a multitude of sins.

My top tip is, buy clothes for the size you are, not the size you wish you were. If you hate the number on the label then cut if off. Nothing worse then somebody refusing to admit they've gone up a size or two and looking like a burst sausage. You actually look slimmer in the bigger sized clothes.

Oh, so it's not just me then

I agree so much with the haircut advice, if I'm ever starting to feel down, that's the first thing I do.

Also, I try to find the time to just wallow in the bath with a facemask on, shave me bits and give my nails a quick coat of shiny stuff.

I've stopped going shopping, it's just far too much hassle and, actually, quite depressing, seing all those tiny little skirts that I'll never wear again. I just order online and try on in the comfort of my own home, changing shoes & handbags, messing on with the hair etc, it's almost like getting ready for a big night on the town pre baby days!

You don't have to spend a lot on yourself, just little treats can help to boost the way you feel, some costume jewellry, a new lippy, a funky nail colour, a pair of pretty knickers.

I think it's too easy to forget to pamper yourself a little when all of your time and money is focused on the kiddies!

I totally agree with MorrisZapp too about the clothes sizes! My wardrobe is full of lovely things that are to small, totally depressing!

Aw i know just how you feel, i have just posted asking for some facial skin cream advice as i feel so haggard. I even used that word!

I am too children too, maybe we should do some kind of 'lets get ourselves feeling good again' thread...!

I'm the same - having children has aged me beyond recognition.
When I tell people how old I am, there is an uncomfortable silence where they are supposed to be saying "ooh, I'd never have guessed".

I am growing my hair as I think it suits me better longer, and hope to lose 1.5 stones will feel a bit less matronly.

i know i look a mess most days,but after 5 children and having hit forty a whle back,the best boost for me is knowing that i CAN still look good

in the summer i still can get beeped by white van drivers!! very shallow but oh,so flattering!

i try and buy one new thing a week for me...

I could have written your post. DS keeps thinking pics of me are of my friend as she is obv. ageing much better.

Had a big at your post IloveTIFFANY!

I used to be so at the toots and whistles, chance would be a fine thing these days.

Perhaps we should club together and hire a white van and go out and do some tooting!

how old are you all?

I found 35 a key age for me. My skin got substantially worse after 35.

Don't forget to change skincare products as you get older, I was still using my 'teenage' stuff until I was 30. Much better skin now I am using the right stuff!

A good haircut that suits you is important (needn't be expensive). Nothing will make you feel worse than 'bad' hair scraped back into a ponytail cos you can't be arsed (oh yes I sported that look for a few years

And... Underwired. Push. Up. Padded. Bra. End of.
The do fab ones in Next. And get them titties measured!

all my worries jumped on my face when i was 30 lines around the eyes especially but at 46 i dont think i have changed that much from then. I mean i still look my age not dead young looking or anything but it could be worse saying that caught a glimspe of myself in m and s today thought i looked quite glam when i left the house needless to say moved rather quickly away for the mirror

I don't have spare cash for nice creams / products but when my family ask me what I would like for my birthday / xmas I always ask for No.7 perform & protect serum, clarins stuff or vouchers for a nice beauty salon near me.

Clothes vouchers / cash are also good pressies IMO, I like browsing the sales in January and see what sensible bargains I can get. I have mounds of clothes (mainly top shop or H&M) that were in the sale but are basic enough to last for many seasons.

oh God foxinsocks, I am 35! And I'm just about to have another DC and get the broken nights again!

my friend who is a mum of 2 dc started looking v glam lately she said 'oh i went and got my make up done at one of the counters in boots and then for my birthday i asked for boots vouchers from everyone so i could buy all the stuff they used' - good idea i reckon.

I have found that cheaper cosmetics are a false economy, they don't offer enough coverage! I have had to revert back to more expensive concealers and foundations. If you put a bit of slap on it automatically makes you feel better! Does not mask my saggy jelly belly though! Must do some exercise, I don't know how my tum has got to such gargantuan proportions!

depends which cosmetics - foundation and concealer you get what you pay for - eye and lip stuff you can go a bit cheaper i reckon

Dorothea, lack of sleep has a lot to answer for I think!

I have just bought some avene moisturiser as recommended by lady in Boots, and i have just put some on my face and it is lovely!

Oh yes trying to fit in a haircut and highlights when you're breastfeeding is nigh on impossible - so you have my sympathies! Maybe just get the cut for now? Pop in for the dye job later? If you split the appts up it might not be too bad but I really know where you're coming from.

sungirltan, agree - eye and lip stuff you can get much cheaper. Saw young, newly married, well turned out neighbour earlier (had not seen her for a while) and she seemed to look me up and down in horror as if to say "she's let herself go!" DH thought it was hilarious "oh yes, she probably thinks that's what will happen to her when she has a baby!

I look back at photos of me when my last child was 6 months old and I look 45 not 28. When she started school I looked 30 again. My advice do not cut your hair short and get a brilliant bra or your boobs done, the diference to your confidence is beyond belief.

i vote bra rather than getting boobs done! (but thats a rant for somewhere else) - if you are short on cash i buy all my undies from H&M - they have all sorts of stuff and the fit is good. try on everything if you have time but def look at ones with some decent architecture underneath.
if you want to look bigger and rounder you can get thse amazing gel bras in debenhams (sorry i forget brand) although they were £20 when i bought one back along.
if time/stress is keeping you from the high street i recommend la redoute (sign up to their emails and they send whopping discount vouchers all the time) or boohoo.com/asos.com - don't know if they are your kind of styles but they are mega cheap.

i'd stay out of new look ande primark for a quick fix - nasty quality and the tailoring is bad.

if your boobs are heading south Marks and Spencers total support bras are brilliant you can get nice Black lacy ones

It just takes longer, doesn´t it? For me grooming has really become quite a project, whereas in my twenties I just had bare legs (always tanned and slim as was sporty and outdoorsy)and no make-up and long hair in ponytail...looked fine.

NOW I shave and prune reliously (hair sprouting in strange places, need to constantly check between eyebrows, on chin and...erm...other places.), my feet are grim so need loads of footfiling and varnish...Legs are grim (all that tanning led to prematurely ageing knees)and need exfoliation, moisturising and waxing....it goes on and on.

My eyes are puffy in the morning, my skin is sagging, my hair is greying at the temples but am allergic to dye, so just pull hairs out (ouch).... help help help.

DH and DCs do wonder what I am doing in bathroom all morning , I used to be such an au-naturel-girl

it is just so much more work now!!!

I am 37 and dont think I look too bad, in fact am slimmer and fitter than I was in my 20s but it does take a lot more effort