Just as my A/W breastfeeding wardrobe gets sorted, I discover a most heinous oversight

[LetThemEatCake]

what to give birth in!!???

am thinking this with these??

You will bleed all over those lovely socks the second you get up to shuffle off for a wee. Bad idea!

Well I can't extoll the virtues of cashmere socks and specialist "birthing wear"! But, I can heartily recommend homebirth surrounded by Diptyque candles .

I had a homebirth with DS2. Candle light, frankincense and lavender essential oils burning away, no music. Everyone was so quiet and calm (except for me who, at various times, was mooing like a cow......even though I was supposed to sing through the contractions ).

I was nekkid through the majority of labour so no fashion crisis for me! Although there is photographic evidence of me wearing a mahoosive white sweatshirt, sitting on a birthing ball, eating soup......to this day, I have no idea where that sweatshirt came from!! Quite possibly it belonged to our new au pair at the time...... I had gone to the salon 3 days before DS2 was due and had my highlights done, eyebrows, legs and the necessary waxed, and a pedicure. I look back at the photos and I don't shudder at the sight of myself (DS1 was a totally different story).

Now you tell me I bought candles to the delivery suite only to be told I couldn't use them because of the gas. My cashmere socks did however survive as I ended up having a blood transfusion and was therefore in bed with a catheter for 24 hours after.

I can't think of a time in my life when cashmere socks would have been less appropriate!! Candles?! Specially created wrap tops?! Bugger that - spend the money on chocolate and give birth in an old nightie or in the nuddy. There's nothing wrong with shaving your legs and blow-drying your hair if you have time before the big event but there's nothing you can spend money on that will make you look attractive as you push another human being out of your chuff. Too many bodily fluids.

With everything going on, would you even notice cashmere socks? I wouldn't have noticed if I'd been wearing sandpaper on my feet. Surely it's not just me?