What does one wear to a small but formal and traditional (Catholic) funeral nowadays?

[Countingthegreyhairs]

Sorry for maudlin topic -

It seems rather frivolous to be posting about this but I want to be as appropriately dressed as poss. Also, what do dc wear?

Thank you all again and thanks Georgimamma. Easter Sunday is a particularly poignant day on which to die I think

Yes, thought it would be better to be over-dressed than under-dressed and to look as if we'd made an effort but didn't want to stick out like a sore thumb either if that makes sense .. Am duly reassured! Thanks again.

We had a black nail varnish "situation" at a family wedding a while back Flipperty - an art student girlfriend of my brother's decided to upstage the bride and appear in a miniscule button covered bustier, black ra-ra skirt, beehive & black cowboy books topped with massive black Spanish bull-fighting style hat for an RC country wedding in the wilds of Herefordshire...!! No-one would have batted an eye in London (well, only one or two) and I'm not usually prudish about these things honestly but the priest took offence and it all rather distracted from the matter in hand!! !

i agreee with georgiemama. better to be slightly over dressed as it shows you have made an effort

i think your Dd outfit sounds fine. i wouldnt worry about a grey beret, it will be fine. white blouse is also great - after all , the men will be wearing white shirts i assume

unless requested otherwise i always wear dark ( not necessaaily black) clothes to a funeral.There are always other guests in navy, dark grey, dark brown etc

IMO smart and clean and dark colours matters more than black, esp to the older generation

so smart grey coat and brown dress miles better than black jeans and black leather casual jacket

Sorry KristinaM - only just caught up with your reply - thank you

I think your point about being smartly turned out as long as sombre-ish colour is important - as mark of respect - will make sure we have our hair cut and shoes polished etc

Sadly, the lady in question has now died and we are waiting to know date of funeral

Thanks again for your advice everyone

Sorry to hear this Counting.

Thanks Rip. She'd had a very long and interesting life and "was ready to go" so although sad there are many things to be thankful for too ...

How was the funeral? I hope it goes well

Sorry kristinaM - only just caught up with this thread today - thanks for asking

... it went as well as these things go thanks.... I think she would have been pleased ... and it was interesting to meet all the far-flung members of dh's family ...

most were wearing black so am happy I went with that

Thank you again for everyone's advice on here

that's good. I do think a sucessful funeral is a comfort to everyone. she sounds like the kind of person who would have wanted a proper send off with everything done decently

Yes, you are spot on Kristina, it really WAS a comfort and we were lucky enough to have wonderful contemplative music from her church choir (including some Palestrina) and a very touching sermon from her priest ... ... there was a real sense of peace during mass ....

the whole thing was arranged according to her wishes right down to some lovely spring flowers in church -

I didn't know her well so don't want to sound disrespectful - but it was almost an enjoyable occasion - I think she would have approved!

Its lovely when its personal, isn't it? When you think " Oh she would have enjoyed that piece" or " those were her favourite flowers". There is a real sense of celebrating their life rather than just mourning their death

Yes, that was it exactly. It was sad but it also "felt right" somehow.

Thanks again for asking!