Daft question: What to wear to a funeral?

[Lua]

I know this seems a stupid question, but I never been to a funeral. Am I supposed to wear black head to toe, or this is just in the movies kind of thing?

Also not a style question (not that the first one is...), but how about kids? Do they wear black?? and am I crazy to bring my along (6 and 3)?

It is my husbands great aunt, she was a lovely lady and 103! so I wanted to go... bu perhaps I shouldn't because of the kids?

any thoughts?

many thanks!

taking your children fine imo (although i would rather get someone to look after them - mine would be fidgeting and griping the whole hour)

Children in normal clothes (maybe navy or darker colours though)

head to toe black isnt neccessary for you either imo. What have you got? Black trousers? Grey top? etc...

sorry to hear about your great aunt btw - 103 is quite an achievement though!

I'm not sure a funeral of a Great Aunt is a great place to take young children. Could someone mind them while you go and then deliver them afterwards, to lighten the atmosphere a little at the 'cake and tea' part of the day?

I was thinking about black trousers and something else not as dark - but didn't know if it wold be considered disrespectful.

Thanks!

Well I have been to several over the past two years, and usually wear a dark suit that I would wear for work, with a plain white blouse - sombre wear rather than bold patterns and colourful.

I have taken both kids recently to my grans funeral, but it was more to do with childcare issues as the funeral was 150 miles away from home. At more local ones, I have left the kids with other people for church and crem part, and then gone and fetched them for the wake, as family love to see them all.

I guess it all depends whether you have an option to leave them elsewhere, my Mum had my two for DH's uncle and his mother. I fetched them after the ceremony and it really cheered everyone up, especially the younger one, as some people had never met him. It does depend upon their behaviour and whether the other relatives would approve!

Hope you work something out!

you are both right, I think I will try to get there for after th funeral.

Same problem here it is an hour away, and all the family is going. So I want the distant family to see the kids. But pehaps I can show up only for after the burial? there will be a lunch thing... or is that bad behaviour?

Wear what you think the dead person would have liked. Maybe something you wore when you saw them at a special time - a party anniversary, some event where you really enjoyed yourself and your great aunt was there.
My husband died a year ago, and the people I really remembered from the funeral were those who wore their characteristic garb (one friend in his purple dms) or something normal that they would have gone to the pub with him in.
If your great aunt was fond of your children (and I bet she was), don't worry about taking them either.

Please don't worry about formality, you should be there remembering and celebrating someone you loved.

I think any dark trousers and coat perfectly acceptable.
Plus,for any 'older' person's funeral in our family we have taken the children.
My gran was 96 and we thought taking them was s uch a wonderful celebration of her life,they were her legacy,ifyswim.
Death is part of life,after all,and if funeral is a celebration of life,as in a person of her age,what better way to pay tribute,imho.