Advice for teenage DD

[mermaid101]

My DD is 15 and I’m looking for some advice to help with her clothes. She is a size 8 for jeans/skirts and her bra size is 28GG.

It’s really hard for her especially in summer as the pretty strappy tops all her friends wear look different on her. I’ve been shopping with her today and anything she wants to wear makes her look like she is going on a night out.

we have to get her bras from bravissimo which she hates and I was like this at her age and my mum was horrible to me and made me buy huge size 20 tops which were not age appropriate. I think it has really affected me.

part of me thinks I should just let her wear what she wants but I think it would draw a lot of judgement and unwanted attention.

I would love to hear from anyone who has some suggestions for me

Next have packs of really nice sleeveless vest tops. They have a deep v-neck which is good for big boobs but they’re not strappy. They’d look great with jeans or cut off denim shorts or skirts.

Honestly - at this size, I would be very open to her coming to me once 18 if she wanted a breast reduction surgery.

As for the immediate issue… my teen lives in low slung jeans or urban outfitters joggers, a vest top / slightly too low cut t shirt for my liking! and then almost always a jumper from urban outfitters etc over it.

I’m not really sure that there’s many options i am afraid… especially with summer coming up

What sort of thing did she want to wear that made her look like she was going on a night out? Just for an idea of the sort thing that appealed but I assume you vetoed?

Bravissimo have some very pretty bras with a 28 back size (DD1 is a 28DD and she loves their pretty bras), what does your DD not like, or does she just perceive Bravissimo as a shop for women with big boobs? DD1 is very evangelical about it, she is tiny (size 4) and always tells people that they need to be properly measured and explains about sister sizes and why someone with small boobs can be a DD. DD2 has bigger boobs and she wears tops that cover up a bit more than DD1, more baby Ts than strappy vests but that is her choice rather than mine. Her belly button is always on show though.

But really, just let her wear what she wants, she's 15. You telling her her clothes are inappropriate is the issue, not her bra size.

Honestly - at this size, I would be very open to her coming to me once 18 if she wanted a breast reduction surgery.

She has a 28 back, her boobs won't be enormous, but at 15 she propably feels self conscious in comparison with her friends who have typical small and gravity defying teenage boobs. No need to have unnecessary surgery that can have serious side effects.

What does she want to wear and let’s try and navigate that. My own DD loves a cami top with joggers but she doesn’t have much in the way of boobs to worry about.

Is that the BOB size?
Boux Avenue do bras for small backs. My DD has a small back at (actually a 26 but no chance of getting that) but the opposite problem and self-conscious. Their straps come up tight so a 30 does fit a 28 inch ribcage. My DD lives in jeans and joggers- would that make her look less like she is going out. Would a minimiser or sports bra help?

Just pause for a minute and reread

1. 28GG is very very large, heavy and uncomfortable. Will impede exercise and I doubt she’s finished growing and really impacts clothing choices it would seem
2. i would be “open” IF she came to ME wanting surgery

better?

Second Boux Avenue, really good at fitting too, so worth a visit maybe. Marks and Spencer also has pretty bras in larger cup sizes, and Brastop online is always worth a look

As for the clothes, I’d probably just let her wear the vest tops, assuming not too plunging . Maybe layer them for extra coverage. Them or a fitted crop tee with the baggy jeans/trackies they all wear now

jackets like this are popular and would suit

bershka

I wear 32FF which is a sister size of 28GG. I'm a size 10, my boobs are not unmanageable. My DD who wears a 28DD is a size 4. The OPs daughter will be somewhere between us. And nowhere does the OP say it impedes clothing choice, just that she thinks 'anything she wants to wear makes her look like she is going on a night out' which tells me this is a mother who is worried her young teen looks too sexualised, not that the teen herself is finding it difficult to find clothes she likes or is uncomfortable (she won't be since her Mum is getting her bras that properly fit).

Breast reduction impacts nipple tenderness (so reduces sexual pleasure) and can affect BFing. Not something to be casually suggested for a child by someone who has read a couple of paragraphs on the internet.

Marks and Spencer also has pretty bras in larger cup sizes

They don't sell 28 back sizes beyond a D so no good.

And look at Zara for tops and jeans

Sweet Jesus

at this size IF my 18 year old came to me and said she wanted a breast reduction to a size 28D for example, I would be OPEN to it

got it? Now?

we have to get her bras from bravissimo which she hates

somewhat impeding her clothing wear

I think high neck sleeveless tops might be good, and patterns tend to make shape less obvious rather than plain colours.

She’s got to be self conscious at GG. At the same age I took DD to Rigby and Peller. Yes, expensive but the bras they suggested were great. A DD is nowhere near a GG. And that’s going to make her out of proportion. I know how hard that is!
DD is still a 30F. She’s slim but has the boob genes from me! I had a breast reduction but waited until I got an inheritance!

Regarding clothes: vests with wider shoulders. T shirts and nothing too skimpy I’m afraid.

They sell 98 different styles of bra is a 28GG, hardly restrictive. In my experience (2 teen DDs) all 15 year olds hate going bra shopping. Better to go to Bravissimo and have a vast choice than to go to M&S and have nothing in her size.

Well this girl isn’t happy. She isn’t you.

My point is

my 18 year old come to me and say she’s so unhappy with her breasts and their size and feels it impact her day to day quality of life and would like surgery to reduce - hell yes I’ll be “open” to it.

You @FruAashild would shut her down. And that’s your way. Fine

But it’s a bit of an unfashionable shop for a youngster.

Needs must and all, but I see why she’s fed up. It’s the opposite of boux Avenue, or the pretty little things her friends will be getting

She could also search out some influencers on Instagram with her build. Google says Maia Andrews on Instagram is 28G. The first reel I saw is a Berska try on of tops. Could be good for inspiration.

The OP asked if she should let her 15yo wear skimpy clothes like her friends. I said let the teenager wear what she wants. You suggested surgery as a solution. I don't think I'm the problem here.

Reread the op

no where does she say her daughter wants to wear skimpy clothes

she wants to wear what is in the shops for this age group, which by virtue of her breast - always looks very revealing and skimpy

And the op started the thread because she wants to help her daughter who It’s really hard for her

I’ve been shopping with her today and anything she wants to wear makes her look like she is going on a night out.

part of me thinks I should just let her wear what she wants but I think it would draw a lot of judgement and unwanted attention.

It is the OP who is uncomfortable with what her daughter wants to wear.