Is there such a thing as living beautifully?

[PhilosophyStoned]

This is not strictly S&B in a conventional undertaking but I think the audience on this board may engage in my pondering of the sun lounger. I have had time to rest and let my mind wonder for a few days, and do a bit of a stocktake on my everday life, what I would like to do less of and more of when I get back home. I feel like work stress has become all consuming, ruining every part of my existence. I can’t remember the last time I took time to enjoy something ritual like - a coffee without a device, cooking something from a recipe, never mind properly choosing ingredients or even travelling outside Lidl for food. Chose something nice to exercise in. Everything has become functional to “get things done.” I am getting through life like a to do list. So, I have wondered if it is really possible to work full time and still somehow live like you savour each day? What does it mean? Does owning less or more helps?

I think doing things mindfully helps.. even boring things like cleaning the toilet.. if you put all your focus on the task your doing and really take in the smells, how things feel what things really look like, nearly everything you do will feel ritualistic

Oooh, this is just the sort of thread I like!! I think mindfully is a good way of putting it. Seeing the joy and beauty to make things feel more special. I have been veey convicted to be thankful recently. It has made me consider all the lovely things in my life that I take for granted, but which are so special. If someone took them.away from me I would be heartbroken/really miss them. Some of that is the visual/aesthetic but it extends beyond that to the people in my life, my job etc.

I like this sort of thread too. Every holiday I decide I need to slow down, garden more, swim and walk more, less device time etc. but then I come home and real life hits and I’m dashing about like mad again. But! I tend to feel more content when I’m going at life busily knocking off my to do list. I feel a bit lost and low when I’m on holiday. So god knows what the answer is! I do agree that mindfulness helps and also having as much beauty around me as possible.

Don't be silly

I drink from my favourite glass.
Have beautiful smelling rooms
Wear the best perfume.
“earn” 90 minutes of football by putting washing away in the half time….
Send a heartfelt messsge to a friend randomly..

Those little things help me feel like I’ve living and not existing?

Yes I'm completely with you, OP and I try to build this sort of thing in. I even went through a phase of trying to use candles not electric light when I woke up in the morning in winter in order to have half an hour of peaceful adjustment but it wasn't very practical 😂 I think when you're busy it's too easy to get into "doing" mode where even the things you actually like to do become just a box on the to do list.

I had a colleague whose wife was Japanese, and he's learned from her a very complicated way to make tea- not a full tea ceremony just a very detailed and mindful process- and it used to irritate me tremendously especially as we had a very busy and fast-paced office- "JUST MAKE THE BLOODY TEA"- but actually now I can completely see the benefit of a ritual like this, particularly when everything else is busy and fast-paced.

Things I try to do-

• not always dressing for practicality
• drink my coffee while walking round the garden
• tai chi and yoga, especially slower forms of yoga
• cook from scratch where possible
• choosing ordinary household items with care
• communing with my dog
• reading poetry

I suppose the common thread is actually living your life rather than treating it as another thing to be ticked off the list.

I think living beautifully is a thing, yes, and it's something I try to do, though I'm a bit too much of a scruffy klutz to pull it off quite as well as my namesake.

In a second hand bookshop years ago, I found "My Secrets" by Joan Collins. I bought it kind of as a joke (although I do love Joanie), but it's actually a really good self-help book.

It has this wonderful line:

The couturier, Valentino, who lives more beautifully than practically anyone I know, is rumoured to have once said that he would rather starve than eat off an ugly plate!

I am inching towards my home being just beautiful in every way, but it's a long old road when you're not rich. I don't mean making it magazine-perfect and spotless at all times (fat chance with my pets), but just being done, and everything in it thought through for comfort, practicality and aesthetics.

I do love dinnerware though, and I collect various studio pottery services, as well as vintage linens, glassware and so on.

It’s a lovely concept.. living more purposefully, appreciating nature, wild life, noticing the things around you, noticing emotions and just letting them be.. not trying to fight them.

I think of this as more living mindfully, which is good. Living beautifully for me is more aesthetic and material, but I suppose with an element of mindfulness - the William Morris adage of having nothing that isn't useful or beautiful.

I like to, for example, wear nice things to exercise in, or even to garden in. I don't mean smart or fancy, but thought through, practical and well made, so that I feel good wearing it.

I always try to just slow down… there’s literally nothing that doesn’t benefit from being done more slowly!

Even if I’m in a queue of traffic and, when it eventually starts to move, I don’t immediately nudge up to the car in front… I just gradually roll.

Making a sandwich - using really lovely ingredients, and taking the time to make it look really appetising on a nice plate, with one of my extensive supply of lovely soft, old linen napkins.

Preparing my cat’s dinner carefully and ‘serving’ it to him like he’s in a posh restaurant - it makes me laugh to myself if nothing else as I say to him: ‘Would you like to follow me to your table, sir’ 😂 and he gets an excited little trot on to get to his dish as I put it down.

Noticing and appreciating the lovely things I own: everything from my beautiful old (occasionally temperamental) car to my favourite hairbrush or the little glass pot on my dressing table that I keep cotton wool pads in. Also, my dressing table - it’s my space to take time to pamper and look after myself and I spend ages rearranging stuff in the drawers, rubbing moisturiser into my face, writing birthday cards, reading messages from friends on WhatsApp or a bit of poetry… I never do anything ‘admin-y’ or tasks I don’t enjoy whilst sitting at my dressing table… it’s a space for indulgence and pleasure.

I imagine this might be unpopular on Mumsnet, but Matthew 6 changed my life:

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your lifea]?
28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Quality of life is about accepting that you’re not fully in control, and that’s okay. You can die at any time, and that’s okay. Just have a nice time and be a good person while you’re here.

yes, for me, it’s about filling my life with things that make me happy. they don’t have to be expensive, but they need to be meaningful.

Making dinner with some herbs and spices i brought home from holiday.

Exercising in my workout jacket from Lidl for £10 makes me smile as it fits me amazingly and would choose it above way more expensive ones.

a charity shop find i later found out was a much sought after vintage hipster brand.

Stalking items i want online until i get a discount.