I have two (possibly related) dilemmas. Help with either please!

[Sidebeforeself]

Dilemma 1 - I cannot find a jeans style to suit me. Im 5 ‘ 4 , 2 stone overweight with thick sausage legs. Skinny looks just awful, straight looks like skinnies should, bootleg sticks to my thighs, Mom,boyfriend and barrel are too wide at the worst part of my thighs. Wide legs are good but only if I wear a heel so no good for day to day. Any other styles I can try?

Dilemma 2 - I live in jeans. I don’t mind that (apart from Dilemma 1!) but Im plagued with thrush/BV etc so really need looser clothes. I like skirts but only with tights which obviously doesnt help. What else could I wear for casual, day to day life that might give me more..air ?!

Thanks. I am a nightmare I know!

Stockings?

Dilemma 1: I like carrot style jeans (also chunky of thigh).

Dilemma 2: I cannot wear jeans in hot weather. For trousers M&S is good for wide leg cotton or linen trousers. Toast is great for a wide leg with a bit of shape (I think they call them balloon trousers).

And cotton cycling shorts under skirts/dresses are an absolute essential for the larger leg - they avoid the chub rub so you stay comfy. I get a multipack from Amazon.

If thrush/BV is an issue make sure you change knickers throughout the day especially if it is a hot/sweaty day. Or wear washable period pads to help avoid a moist environment (sorry for using the m word!) e.g. https://amzn.eu/d/034L8JMx

I think the person who said leggings meant under skirts for the same effect as tights but more breathable

I thought of you yesterday OP as I was trying on jeans in M&S. I came away with two styles - boyfriend midrise ankle grazer (but I bought them in 'regular' length, so they're full length on 5'4" me as I find ankle length just makes my legs look shorter and fatter than they already are), and wide leg jeans in 'short' as they are the correct length. I tried on six different pairs of various styles. The barrel leg ones weren't flattering.

https://www.marksandspencer.com/boyfriend-mid-rise-ankle-grazer-jeans/p/clp60775574?color=DARKINDIGO

https://www.marksandspencer.com/high-waisted-wide-leg-jeans/p/clp60504942?color=DARKINDIGO

https://suzydlondon.com/products/153-faux-leather-ultimate-joggers-1?variant=56018019058038 I am same height and a little bellied and these are fab. I have a few colours.

Book in to John Lewis with a personal shopper and tell them what you want. They can preselect a selection and they will go and grab others that might work for you as they get to understand what you like/don’t like. Later time I looked it was a free service but it has been a while .

Thanks everyone for your comments. Bless you @zurigo for thinking of me and I’m near a Marks tomorrow so will go in and have a look.

Just to answer a few general points. I had never thought of opening the crotch on tights - such a good idea! I cannot get on with stockings at all.

I am already doing a lot of things to try to beat the BV. Never use bath rustiness , only cotton underwear etc. I think Ive just prone to it. Couldn’t sleep in PJs without knickers as I’d need to wear a clean pair of PJs everyday and Im not doing that much washing!

Leggings under skirts I dont like but the suggestion of cargo pants is a good one. I’ll look out for them now Spring stuff is in shop. @jeaux90 I think those pants would make dilemma 2 even worse!

I’ll also look into getting some wedged trainers so I can wear the wider legged jeans.

Really appreciate your help.

There are a lot of cotton trousers around generally at the moment in a variety of cuts - I was in London recently and took the opportunity to try a lot on. I came away with two of slightly different barrel cut one in green and one in blue. Really wearing them a lot at the moment.

mine were from Uniqlo

I’d cut my losses and ditch the jeans. I find them heavy and uncomfortable and much prefer, especially now we’re coming into summer, loose linen or linen blend trousers. They’re much more comfortable and go with anything. If you get a linen blend they don’t even crease much. H&M do a huge range with prices from about £18 to £70 ish and they have loads of colours and shapes. Here’s an example:

https://www2.hm.com/en_gb/productpage.1318791002.html

I am 5ft and find that one of the problems with jeans is that the knee placement (which creates the overall shape) ends up halfway down my calf, so taking up regular jeans legs makes me look stumpy and frumpy. It is worth trying on “petite” length jeans and seeing if the shapes are better. (Just hold them up next to “regular” ones and check that the knees are closer to the hanger to make sure that they will fit you better.) Failing that, I have found that Uniqlo & Muji jeans are shaped for a more human figure than most European jeans that are aimed at supermodels.

Have you had a swab to confirm thrush? Could be vaginal atrophy. You would see your GP/pelvic floor physio about it

God I wouldn’t be living in jeans if I was plagued with thrush - you’re doing yourself no favours. What about loose fitting harem pants? Lots of air.

Dilemma 2 - I generally prefer skirts but absolutely loathe tights. Ive worn hold-ups for decades. Much airier!

uniqlo men’s cords, chino style cut, elastic waist. I am same size as you and have been living in these, have a couple of pairs. Size M is a good fit for me (5’4, big tummy). They are a nice baggy cut and have deeeeep pockets

on the thrush thing, how old are you? I was plagued with it for years in mid-late 40s, then a couple of weeks of topical oestrogen and oestrogen peasant cleared it up and I haven’t had it since

I’ve started wearing long johns under skirts. So much more comfortable than pants, no need for tights. Look up thigh chafing shorts. I like ones with a cotton gusset, but the same fabric as tights. I accidentally bought more substantial ones with no cotton gusset recently which probably wouldn’t help the thrush situation!

I hate to make the suggestion on S&B as they are neither stylish nor beautiful. They are however comfortable and avoid any VPL.

cropped leggings do the same job. Again, no underwear just the leggings. I cannot tell you how much more comfortable it is!

I do have a drs appointment re my gynae issues. I’m post menopausal so yes it could be atrophy.

im sorry but Im really not into harem pants.

Im hoping a don’t have to ditch jeans altogether, just want some alternatives so I can ring the changes

I have two pairs of these relaxed straight leg jeans from Tu. I love the fit - it's straight, but...relaxed. Nothing clings. Worth a look? https://tuclothing.sainsburys.co.uk/product/tuc147000283

I teach yoga and like to make it accessible and welcoming, so I often teach in non-yoga clothes. I’m also someone who defaults to jeans!

I have found that I like cotton and linen trousers, normal crotch not dropped, and dungarees like Lucy and yak originals. They offer movement and comfort while feeling practical and contained like with jeans. Have a look at Lucy and Yak because they do a range of shapes and their returns are quite good I think. You also see them on Vinted. Failing that, the staff in Levi’s shops tend to be good at helping you find the right pair.

I am the same height and overweight-ness as you, OP, though my problem areas are more tummy and bottom than thighs. I’ve actually found wide legged trousers surprisingly flattering with a boxy top - sort of balances you out. I’d definitely try wide legged cotton or linen trousers as an alternative.

https://www.seasaltcornwall.com/veronica-short-sleeve-midi-jersey-dress

These sort of dresses with Birkenstocks make up my summer uniform.

These denim jersey trousers are fantastic. Comy and flattering.
I am 5ft and size 16. They look great on.

www.marksandspencer.com/denim-jersey-straight-leg-trousers/p/clp60716264?color=INDIGO#intid=pid_pg1pip3g4r1c2%7Cprodflag_srp_ts_QP_57

I wear these Wirarpa cotton cycle shorts under dresses in the summer. So comfy and no chafing or thrush etc 👏

shorturl.at/7rEf1

You're welcome @Sidebeforeself! One more thing - if you like the wide leg styles and find them flattering, they come in a huge variety of materials atm as they're just in fashion. Linen is very cool for the summer months and would almost certainly help with your BV issues. I also had this before I went on vaginal oestrogen and highly recommend asking your GP to give it a try. I had some gynae issues last year and saw a consultant at one point and she said that not only did I have atrophy, but that most women of menopausal/post menopausal age do. This was news to me as I had no idea. The solution, for many, is vaginal oestrogen, so give it a try. I've found it's helped with several different things and definitely given me a bit of va-va-voom back 😂

I have abdomen issues and need comfortable waistbands. I rarely wear jeans now in favour of pull on black or navy trousers mainly from m&s. They have so many different styles, one of my favourite for at home days running errands is their goodmove straight leg joggers.