Is it really that bad?

[Petuniapet]

I'm so tired of people commenting on my pale skin in a negative way! Mostly from my in-laws and work colleagues (under the guise of 'banter'). It's just wearing a bit thin now and it's making me self conscious as to weather I really look that bad.

My dad is Scottish and I take after him for my complexion. I wear make up most days but I don't fake tan as I also have very dry skin and it never looks good on me unfortunately. I do tan eventually on holiday but it never lasts long and I don't particularly enjoy being in the scorching heat for hours on end anyway. I used to go on sunbeds in my late teens but I don't won't do that anymore as my friend had skin cancer from sunbed use.

Is there anything I can do to compliment my pale skin? Or any tips from fellow pale Mumsnetters for batting off the negative comments?

id lean into it. Have you had your colours analysed? We all have specific tones which enhance our natural colouring. Knowing which yours are might make you feel a bit more settled in your own skin?

I have a colleague who has possibly the fairest complexion I’ve ever seen. I’m always a bit distracted by how clear and beautiful her skin is tbh.
I don’t bring it up but she sometimes says she might get a spray tan or use gradual tanner and I will say I think her complexion is lovely but that if it would make her feel more confident then it’s worth a try.
Sorry people are so bloody rude, where I work you’d be hauled off to HR for making unwanted personal comments if the affected member of staff made a complaint.

I too have very pale skin, with dark brown hair and blue eyes. If I had a pound for every bit of advice ive been given on how to get my skin to tan. Ive never asked for this advice btw. However im having the last laugh now because I look at least 10 years younger than most at my age, all thanks to copious amounts of f50 to stop my skin burning.
Embrace your beautiful skin and look after it.

im the same. I have very pale skin and dark hair.

I look back and it was beautiful I see now. sadly I had psychosis and have developed a very nasty skin disorder - which is very disfiguring. I wish id never worried aobut my beautiful skin

Ignore them. They're idiots.

I have been looking into colour analysis. It definitely intrigues me. Everywhere I've looked seems so expensive though!

Sorry you have so many rude people in your life. Tell them they are being rude. They can either admire your beautiful skin or keep their unsolicited advice and opinions to themselves.

I never gave my skin tone a second thought until about 10 years ago with FIL and MIL made comments and they've never really stopped. Back then I had nice clear skin, but since I've had children I have quite bad rosacea on my cheeks which is why I usually wear make up every day. My friend has skin just as fair as me but she says nobody ever really mentions it but I think it is because she is quite striking looking with it whereas I am a bit more 'mumsy' looking (translation: a couple of stone too heavy and hair needs doing).

Take it as a compliment and be a bit smug with it…
eg:
Dickhead: Gosh - you’re pale!
you: thank you! I make sure I keep out of the sun as it’s so dangerous and aging.

Ask chat gpt

I had my colours done by ChatGPT the other day! It was so good (and free obviously!) I put a photo on and it recommended colours, jewellery, make up and hair colour.

Light brown hair and hazel eyes so maybe I look a bit washed out? I don't know. I never even thought of myself as pale skinned as a child/teen but I'm quite conscious of it now. I even had a doctor in the hospital comment how pale I am after I gave birth (I was paler than usual after losing a lot of blood) and telling me I needed to go on holiday. I just asked him if he was paying and that shut him up!

That's a great idea! I'll have a look at doing that!

You can get a course of IPL to treat rosacea - it worked a treat on mine!

Embrace your skin tone, its who you are. Take a look online for ideas of colours to work with and also the colours that can wash you out. The colours that you wear can make a massive difference to your overall complexion.

You can ask chat gpt. I'm very sceptical about about it. "My colours" are the colours I like.

On other people I might look at what some one is wearing and think that's a great/terrible colour but I don't get the "that colour really suits you/makes you look dead" thing.

Im so pale that I look blue. I wish I had some colour to my skin but such is life.

People are so rude to pale people. I’ve had all the comments over the years about reflecting the sun, blinding people with my white legs.. you get the picture.

I’d also suggest getting your colours done. I’m so pale I’m translucent. Go from bright to white in the sun type of pale. Never tan just go red.

getting my colours done has helped me as im
now a navy girl rather than black and I look so much better for it. Also vitamins and supplements. When my iron and folate levels are low my skin looks dreadful and pale but when I’m on top of anything it looks so much better.

also good skincare! I find no one comments half as much as they did on how pale I am when I’ve got clear skin.

i know you said about your friend and skin cancer, please make sure you wear an spf every day regardless of being in the uk and being pale!

Yep, completely with you there. I think it's even more wearing as I'm 3 months post partum and already feeling shite so extra comments on top don't help!

I'm another vampire.

If i could have milky, clear white skin, I'd embrace it.
But it's moley, and mottled in the cold. And you can see my veins. And I veer more towards yellow white than milkmaid white. Once dark hair and eyes.

Yes I think my legs have burnt a few retinas in the sun in their time 😂

Some great advice there. Thank you! ❤

Do it on chat gpt, I got the exact same results as colour me beautiful

I'm Scottish and olive skinned, as is my dad. Two of my kids are pale blondes but do tan, other two are like casper and will burn from even the flickering of the sun(or maybe even a bloody light bulb), I've taught both dds what colours work best for their tone, both very different, one very blonde/blue eyed, the other dark brunette and green eyed. . Nothing else there is to it really.

I’m very fair, cool undertone and dark brown hair/green eyes. I love it. Jewel tones and red lips. Embracing Snow White vibes. Never understood why people constantly seem to pity it/recommend fake tans etc. Baffling.

I am very pale with dark red hair, I used to hate being so pale but I actually love it now im in my 40s. My university lecturer once called me pale but interesting! I think its about finding your style, leaning into it. Chat gpt recommened purple was a good colour for me to wear, I wouldnt dream of wearing purple but I actually found something nice and went for it and it looks great on me.