How do I update my style??

[Ka1978]

I want to find some new clothes, but am struggling to know where to look!!
I am late 40’s, about 5’ 8’’ and generally a size 14. I quite like my legs, have a bit of a tummy and normally wear jeans and T-shirts / sweatshirts. I don’t have anything against these but want to venture out and change things up a bit.
The problem is, I don’t know where to look - I want something a bit different to the high street options.
Can anyone suggest any websites / brands I should look for?
Thank you!

What do you see people wearing that you like the look of? What colours, fabrics, patterns(or not) appeal to you? What is your budget? What is your life like - what do you need clothes for?

What do you need to dress for - a new job, fancier school gate crowd, Hollywood bought your novel, or do you like the new barista at your favourite coffee shop?

And what sort of budget do you have - strictly Vinted, or strategic Net-a-Porter sale, or somewhere in between?

Ha - I took so long to come back to my post after being distracted, I didn’t see the one above mine.

So, the new clothes are not for anything particular. We have a casual work dress code, my son is passed wanting me anywhere near school gates and I can only dream of the Hollywood situation!
It’s more for me - I have spent a long time feeling like there’s no point making an effort because I don’t like how look in a lot of things, so why bother? I hope I’m beginning to come out of that, and want to stop looking like I’ve come straight from walking the dog!
I like casual, not overly ‘dressed up’ and while I think a lot of people look nice, I can’t see myself carrying off what I see them wearing!
I am more on the Vinted end of the scale - but don’t really know what to search for, because there is just so much to look through. That’s really the reason for asking for recommendations - I am just so out of touch! I want something different (but not radical), and don’t know where to start!

Can you give us examples of women whose style you like?

Yes, from a million posts here I’ve gained the impression that once people fall down the Vinted rabbit hole they can lose touch with what’s actually current, and how things are being styled right this minute.

So it’s worth your time to regularly browse a good number of sites, regardless of whether they’re above your budget, just to ‘keep your eye in’. Then you’ll have a clearer idea of what to look for pre-owned.

At the moment I like the styling at

& Other Stories

YMC

Alexandra Golovanoff

and the clothes at

Margaret Howell

Lemaire

(amongst others)

so if I were looking at pre-owned sites I’d be imagining those sorts of items and outfits.

Have a look at Melissa Murrell on instagram, she’s a personal stylist but does lots of casual looks on normal women.

I'm not quite sure what look you are wanting here, but I've got some tips on where to start.

First- remove things that make you look dated, or you dislike wearing them. I'm afraid (for mumsnetters) that that would include skinny blue jeans for starters. Just changing up one thing, like getting some wide-legged trousers or jeans and then starting to think what would go with those is very helpful for me, anyway.

(I'm not going to argue whether skinnes are round the corner again, some people can get away with a black skinny like Claudia, but she's very confident in her personal style and the OP is not).

Or go the dress route, I can't help with that as I find midi-dresses slightly dated looking and I'm short so they don't work for me, but you are taller and might look good with a midi denim skirt or something like that.

If you go on Vinted, I'd search by fabric, and by brand- so the brands above, for example, or search by wool, cotton, cashmere, leather, only nice quality items then pop up (with a few fake ones scattered in there).

Decide if you like the Scandi look, if you do, then I'd go for linen shirts, a proper wool coat (as the very cold time where you have to wear puffa jackets is passing) or a wool jacket, and white/navy/green t-shirts underneath. I don't entirely go for this myself, but I prefer plainer colours and lovely fabrics which are from that style- I don't like it all too outsized or covered up though.

I also then dress that up with lots of lovely jewellery which stops me feeling my look is so plain.

Great hair too.

I am shooting in the dark here, so if none of this appeals, that's fine, just give us some more clues to the type of look you want (as you say you don't want to look like everyone else, somehow).

Go into a John Lewis or an M and S or a Zara and try on things you wouldn't normally pick but you are drawn to in some way. Typically this might be the colour, the texture, the shape. In particular focus on colour - a quick way to update is to wear more variety of colours or pattern. id guess if you aren't bothered about what you wear your wardrobe is very black, grey or navy dominant, with few patterns or brights? Avoid turquoise, fuschia, red, orange and explore more contemporary colours such as aubergine, coral, all greens, cornflower blue. Matched with non black neutrals (dark brown, khaki, beige, cream, dark grey). Consider footwear as priority also. If you are wearing same old shoes that will date or not compliment your outfits. So also experiment with trying different shoes and boots.

What really helped me was finding fashion influencers on Instagram to show me the kinds of shapes and outfit ideas that worked for my build and height. Then I scoured Vinted for the items I could (mainly all stuff that was still in the shops, BNWT for absolute steals) and topped up on basics from next/M&S etc. Replaced my whole wardrobe and felt so much better.

Which influencers did you find helpful please? Soooo many are insufferable!

Work out what colours suit you based on skin tone, hair and eye colour as this will help narrow down what to look at.
Define your no's and then go online to work out what shape clothes best suit your body type.
Maybe try a John Lewis personal shopper experience to get their input as well.

Once you have this you can use this information to choose better elsewhere.

What I tend to do is keep an eye on Pinterest and Facebook, Insta etc. Save images I like the look of, then see what the common themes are, as against specific items. Then look for a version.

I like Uniqlo a lot at the moment, reasonably priced food quality basics. I'm living in their barrel leg trousers.

One way I stay in touch is by going for a walk around my local H&M at least every few months, not with any intention of buying but to see what's current and how it's being styled. I know some people prefer to look online and I browse websites too but I find they can be a bit overwhelming and, for me, there's nothing quite like seeing the clothes in real life.

I pick my local branch because it's not, in all honesty, particularly well stocked and certainly not cutting edge so I figure they'll only make room for a trend if they're confident it'll sell.

I like Cara Suthers, Kerry Villers and Lauren Bradshaw - comfy put together mum style but it is all quite casual. There's loads out there, you just need to find the ones that work for you!

In terms of influencers to give you some ideas, try Caroline’s Style Hacks, The Silver Kat, Style in the Stix or Wardrobe of a Mid Life crisis. All a bit different from each other but might give you some ideas.

Also have a look at Wardrobe Strategy on Instagram and Patreon. She’s a stylist who writes some really interesting and well researched posts about fashion and style.