Thinking about going blonde

[LovesWatermark]

I've always found I age in jumps. I'm 35 now and find I've recently had one of those ageing jumps recently... I suddenly feel like I look so much like older.

It doesn't help that the DC seems so big now, I've been background ill for ages and life has been so stressful. Altogether, I just feel I look so old and worn out compared to how I used to even last year. Anyway, I have decided that having my hair lighter would help to lift me, generally. I've started going firmly grey this year too, which is definitely not helping! I've never had my hair died before though, so I know nothing about it. My hair was naturally light blond until breastfeeding first DC when it went to dark blonde; with 2nd DC it went to bronde. (I still don't understand this. I've never met anyone else who had permanent hair colour changes from pregnancy/feeding like this!) I think I'd like it to be a sort of warm mid blonde now.

Is there anything I need to know or think about first? I will be getting my lovely hairdresser to do it, definitely not attempting it on my own...

I have mousy brown hair that naturally nightens in summer and gets quite dark in winter. I went for balayage as I am low maintenance but I was starting to notice greys and the blond really helps. It’s not bleachy / ice blonde so it looks more “natural”

That's where it's painted on, right?

How much lower maintenance? I'm quite lazy regarding personal maintenance really - that's the main reason I've never dyed my hair before...

My hairdresser charges about double for balayage compared to highlights. Which I'm somewhat open to if I can get away with being lazier, but not really sure what the difference is.

Highlights look a bit more obvious to me as they are more blocky by nature and you have root regrowth. I get balayage twice a year. I ask for it to start fairly high but not right near roots so you don’t get obvious root regrowth. The colour “thickens” out towards the end. Not having to have roots redone is so much lower maintenance and I think has a better overall look IMO. I also like the look of ombré and other balayage-type styles.

It shouldnt be so damaging since ur already lighter. K18 is really good for after.

Go for balayage as you won't have the growth issue as frequently..

Btw, I felt I looked old when I was 34 / 35 and also had background health problems. When I look back at photos I was right.

Fast forward a few years and I looked phenomenal! I made lots of lifestyle changes which resulted in glowing skin, glossy hair and a great figure. So don't despair. Things never stay the same with kids / family life and I hope you get your health issues sorted.

Please let us all know what changes you made! 40 here this year and feeling the aging process quite acutely 😅

I wasn't very happy with my life and I went on quite a mission to feel good. I didn't really think about my appearance, the looking great was like a side effect.

I drastically cut down on booze, I got really into yoga, running and healthy eating.

I was single and childless and gave myself permission to not feel obligated to turn up to my friends' family events. I know this sounds like a weird one and maybe not relevant to you but it can be adapted; are you spending your (very precious and finite) time doing things and with people that make you feel good and happy?

I began pursuing hobbies and passions just to see if I'd like them and became really curious about exploring options.

It all sounds vague I know when you were probably looking for some info on supplements or skincare products but I'm telling you the truth.

I prioritised being happy and fulfilled above all else. Then making good choices became automatic.

Thank you. This is all great advice ❤️

Everything @Goditsmemargaret said, but in terms of appearance, this

… drastically cut down on booze, I got really into yoga, running and healthy eating.

At the ripe old age of 72 I can attest to the value of prioritising one’s health and leading a life that is rich in interests and experiences. The only thing I would add are the use of skin serums and regular weight training with dumbbells.

Going blonde is a long term maintenance headache.

Highlights are not always blocky. As regards the technique it depends how much grey you have. What % would you say?

Really not very many, but enough for me to be aware of them now. Probably only about 5%, maybe even less. Last year it was only about 10 single hairs at my hair line.

This is what I need to do I think. I've been having massive sleep problems and ended up with chronic background infections from being too busy at work to take sick days when I first started getting ill months ago. I also had to take on some care for my partner, who became disabled which has been very stressful and taken a toll on all of us. And parenting teens and preteens suddenly started being difficult in the last year or so!

I think I just generally need to prioritise looking after me a bit more. This happened before with my sleep and I started properly putting myself to bed with aromatherapy oils and a proper bedtime. I might try that again, it helped quite a bit before. And I have got quite lost; I don't really do anything for me anymore. I need to stay at home on the whole when not working, to make sure DP has everything sorted and is ok, but I could start doing something for me again, even if it's an at home thing.

I do think that having nice hair would help too though! And it's still blond in my mental picture of myself, which is odd as it hasn't been for over a decade. I think I might just have a chat with my hairdresser. She understands exactly how lazy I am... I'm sure she'll be very happy, she's been itching to lighten it from as soon as it went dark.

Not much then!