Hairdresser moral dilemma

[IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads]

I live in a large village, and have had my hair cut in the local salon for 25 years. I know the lady who owns the salon pretty well. Her son and mine went to school together. We both helped out at Cubs together. We have many mutual friends.

However, I want to try a different hairdresser in a nearby town. I want to try a curly hair specialist salon, and see about a style (inverted bob) that my hairdresser says won’t work with my hair (I had it as a teenager though, but I am happy to accept that teenage hair and 50-something hair is different).

Thing is, DM and DD get their hair done at the local salon). DM also uses the beautician upstairs from the salon. So do I occasionally. If I go out, I either have to pass the stylist’s house or the salon. If I go to a different salon, my longstanding stylist will probably know before I get home! I don’t want to offend anyone, or burn any bridges, I just want to do something different with my hair! (Shoulder length, thick, curly but rarely ringletty).

That sounds unspeakably insular.
I'd just bite the bullet and go where you want.

Can ‘someone’ buy you a voucher to use at the new place - that would at least excuse the initial visit.

I think I would have to lie and say that a friend’s dd is doing hairdressing training and has asked if you would be a guinea pig for her.

Just go, and be breezy about it. No guilt.
Nothing to hide.

I like the voucher idea.

I'd say a person who lives in that village gave you a voucher for the hairdresser, so you thought you had better use it up as it's a tight month...
Or just be honest and say you wanted to see a curl specialist.

I don't see why you have to be dishonest in this situation? If I were the hairdresser, I'd be offended about the lie not the customer choosing to go elsewhere.

Following with interest as I have the same dilemma. I feel your pain OP.

Yeah I like the idea of saying that someone gave you a voucher. If you go back to the usual hairdresser in your town next time I bet they say, “omg who cut your hair last time it’s AWFUL!” 😂

Why is lying necessary? Just say that you wanted to try something different, as she was reluctant to offer you what you'd asked for.

I suspect that how someone would choose to handle this dilemma is more a matter of temperament than anything else. I'd take the straightforward approach and simply say that you want to try a curl specialist. It's honest, perfectly reasonable and doesn't store up trouble if you decide to stick with the new hairdresser. But straightforward and frank is usually my preferred approach.
If I were the hairdresser I'd prefer to know the real reason a long-standing customer was switching sooner rather than later. Being lied to would piss me off and, if village life is as insular as you say, the truth will seep out eventually.
You never know, the salon might decide to rent a chair to a specialist for a few hours a week if there's evidence of demand!

Hi. Am a beautician in a small town so not the same but similar. People disappear all the time. Even the ones who have been with you since day dot! Most of the time they pop back up. At the beginning of my career I maybe would have done some soul searching but now I just assume they found a more convenient appointment time elsewhere/ someone cheaper/ closer/ someone they have more in common with/ they've seen good work on social media and wanted to try someone new.

It's just par for the course. If she's been in business long enough not to take it personally. If she is CF enough to ask - voucher, family friend, or even just 'it's been X years and I wanted to try something new' surely would suffice?

Presumably it goes one of two ways. You love the new person and want to keep going to them in which case you don't need to say anything. Or you realise grass isn't greener and go back and still not sure you need to say anything. Maybe just 'it's been cut elsewhere since I was last here'. Then it's more she's lucky you've come back. Once you've established you are not necessarily going to be loyal to the end of your days, it will make it easier to stray again.

It's not very professional to start demanding why you went elsewhere

I would just say that you have found someone prepared to do the style that you want, so you are going there to get it done.

I feel your pain. I am currently taking a diversion around my old salon when I go for a run. Never committing to a hairdresser again!

The thing is if you lie you'll be caught in the lie for ages. I think you need to tell her you want to try a curley specialist. Please let us know how you got on with the new hairdressor.