Hair getting me down

[40andshadedgrey]

I need some advice...

I have always had dark brown hair but started getting greys around 18. Now I'm 40 and have been told I'm 85% grey. It all comes around my hair line and around the crown. If I dye my hair within 10 days it is noticeably grey again. I have fair skin and blue eyes and when I have tried to go lighter in the past I end up looking very washed out. If I have any highlights at all put in my hair, the second I go out in the sun, they go orangy.

On top of that I have a lot of very fine and curly hair with no time to sit and dry/style it in the morning.

I just feel like an absolute mess. It's affecting my self confidence and I think about it all the time. I think that dark hair suits me best but I just can't keep up with the maintenance.

Has anybody else dealt with this and has any ideas going forward?

Unfortunately I can't go with anything too bold colour wise due to my job.

I’m pretty much grey but get it dyed by my hairdresser every 4 weeks , nice little hairdressers it is , £28 for the roots and I dry it at home as have curly hair.

By week two I’m getting grey at my hairline, my hairdresser told me which products to get from Amazon, I use Matrix I think it’s called with peroxide, and just do it myself until I next go. As long I don’t show any partings I’m fine !

I am I've dyed my hair it didn't touch the blonde/ silver bits at all I've just plucked 20 out I'm 38 why this early what😰 can I do?

You need a dye that is especially to cover greys. Or go to a salon and that will be better. I don't think you should pluck them as you could damage hair follicles and end up with thinner hair overall.

It doesn't sound like you have too many so I'm sure using the correct dye or getting it done professionally will be the answer for you.

I’m no help OP but in a very similar situation . I’m naturally auburn and with very pink toned skin with freckles so the richer hair colour suits me so much better. I’ve tried going lighter and it’s awful no matter what shade I try.

I’m 60 and about the same underneath my dye I have a short pixie and have had it coloured slightly darker, so it may be you need a more professional dye or different tone which will disguise the greys as they come through
I go every month
for the first time ever I’m posting my face.. just because I can

You don't sound as if you had very good hairdressers before? A good hairdresser will be able to use a tint to cover the greys and give you some highlights which will be appropriate to your colouring. I get mine done every 8 weeks but could push to 10 if necessary. Life is too short to live with crap hair.

If you like the highlights then use hair sunscreen and wear a sunhat. Try going just one shade lighter than natural colour. Any amount of lighter makes the grey a bit less noticeable and our skin pales as we age too so your face should be able to take it.

Dye it monthly and by day 10 you're going to need hairstyles that don't involve a central or side parting. A little paleness around the roots doesn't show up so much (if you're light skinned anyway) when the hair is tied back/up/part up. It's the parting with the badger stripe that looks awful.

If you're darker skinned I can see how the paleness at the roots is going to be problematic as soon as it shows up regardless of parting or no parting, I can only suggest adding a headband at the hairline to cover it, either the elastic kind or a scarf folded into a strip in a colour matching your outfit and knotted at the nape of your neck under your hair, you can use hair grips to keep it in place.

I do leave the hairdresser with all greys covered and highlights in s tone that suits me. But the regrowth is so quick on my hair and highlights change colour in the sun.

Oh nice, the pixie cut suits you. I just don't think I can keep up with monthly appts, financially or physically.also the roots look bad after 10 days anyway

I like the idea of a headband...Will have to try some out.

Try John Frieda Defy Grey shampoo and conditioner. A friend put me on to this and it works very well.

I use the coloured root spray, or coloured dry shampoo.

Personally I would embrace the grey and make some subtle changes to your clothes and make up to complement the lighter colour.

Would you consider getting it dyed grey all over - the hairdresser could help you pick the best shade for you - not all greys are equal. This would blend with your regrowth and you'd not need to dye it so often. Combined with a really good style it could look great.
I used to know a beautiful woman who had the most amazing grey hair - she was in her late 30s/early 40s and the grey hair was absolutely perfect on her.

Failing that, have you looked into henna? IIRC that's more permanent than other hair dyes

That doesn't sound right. Does she use a toner? Highlights should not be going orangey. I would be changing hairdresser. My highlights might lighten up a bit but have never gone orangey. I think it's your hairdresser that's the issue.

This is my current go to hairstyle, wide headband with all the rest back in a claw clip.
Not sure it works but at least it's cool for summer!