How to style myself as 'alternative' but in a more sophisticated way.

[WelcomeToTheBlackParade]

OK sophisticated may be a little stretch but I'm over 40 now and always been 'alternative'.

I lost weight and decided I was 'too old' for it and ended up dying my hair brown and buying a whole new wardrobe of standard , basic clothes.

But just didn't feel like me :(

I want to look nicer than black band tshirts, bat prints and ripped jeans but how do I do that?

I want to stick to mostly black still but in a more mature way.

Any recommendations?

Following for ideas. I love this lady's style, but it's a little more full on goth than I would personally go:

https://www.instagram.com/stephaniemacdonald923?igsh=MW9sdWk0bHl2cWI5OQ==

Accessorise with bags, shoes and glasses

Whilst I’m unable to relate to the concept of feeling too old at 40(!) for a style, I’d suggest looking at some decent leather trousers and skirts, boots, silk shirts. All Saints has an alternative aesthetic that blends well with an existing wardrobe. Velvet jackets and chunky belts. Look at what Kate Moss wears.

Disturbia have some really nice clothes. They have a nice edge to them and I found them really good quality.

Where do you shop?

I think a lot of clothes on disturbia for example are much "classier" than most of the other alternative sites - lots of dresses with interesting patterns etc.
Other than that just mix it up -checked trousers/flowy skirt with a plain t shirt or blouse or a lacy top with smart black jeans etc.

Go 90s style with dresses and chunky boots (tights in winter) over t shirts or blouses, you can get loads of dresses with vaguely gothy prints or just dark colours on vinted etc.

Or just wear a lot of black but instead of washed jeans with holes and baggy band tees wear plainer, smarter version but accessorise with several necklaces or a print scarf or retro handbag or something. I've got an Alexander mcqueen (second hand!) bag with the skull ornaments which adds something to an otherwise plain outfit.

Oh and maybe look at insta/Pinterest for the dark academia style ideas as that's basically grown up goth - there's a thread on here somewhere too.

This is effectively my style. I have approached my maturing alt style as 'corporate goth'. I buy a lot from Disturbia and Killstar but mix it in with Uniqlo and, weirdly, Hush (they do a lot of plain black/dark grey). The big change has been footwear as I just want comfy feet now! I do have some DMs but only suede/soft ones, and my New Rocks only come out for gigs. Fly London and Vans have been my swap. I still wear cropped band t-shirts and jeans but now it's high waisted wide leg and huge platform boots. If I was absolutely loaded I would just buy All Saints 😆

I would wear black, grey or cream and silver accessories, buy from Cos, M&S, Arket. Androgynous style or plain clothes cut in interesting ways. Jewellery and shoes can make a plain black dress alternative or classic. Look for fabric, cut and texture instead of prints. Dress on the smarter side than casual. Your hair style and make up also plays a role. Flowy curly long hair looks good with bohemian dresses whereas a sharp bob doesn't imho. Decide a capsule wardrobe for the next 3 months and on 1 or 3 hairstyles that you will rotate depending on outfit. Bag old clothes away, you will know what to keep when you start revisiting the bags to get something out.

This isn't my style so maybe I'm being far too simplistic about it but, if it were me, I think I'd buy a tailored blazer and some smart jeans and then just mix things up:
Smart jeans with Band T shirt
Ripped jeans with blazer etc etc.

Could you pick an older celebrity with a similar aesthetic that appeals and get some inspiration? Winona Ryder? Clea Duvall? Rose McGowan? Christina Ricci? eg They seem to do blazers with jeans and t-shirt a lot.

Have you looked at the long-running dark academia threads on here? It won't all be alt but there is quite a crossover, especially with brands like Disturbia: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/style_and_beauty/5178967-dark-academia-3-de-vestibus-agamus-the-conversation-continues

Also have a look at Sammi Jefcoate on Tiktok or Insta.

I don't think much to the pop socks but I like the general look.

I love Disturbia.

I'm 52 and still very fond of a band t shirt, though now I usually customise them to change the fit, neckline and sleeves as a boxy t shirt does me no favours. Skinny/ slim black jeans and long Vonda (the ones with the embroidered roses) are on strong rotation.
I like tops from Manners Ldn for the comfort and interesting things like mesh backs or sides, and the Asri dress is a great goth summer basic.
Little Lies have some good pieces, and I wear the Marianne dress a lot - done up over a tight top and leggings with boots or more open with a vest top and jeans

Have you looked on Hell Bunny? Some of the tops knitwear and dresses might fit your style.