Driving myself crazy with Facial Asymmetry

[JellieT0tz]

Anyone else hate their asymmetric face?
I remember being in my 20s and seeing myself reflected in bathroom mirrors where the illusion gave you your true face image rather than the mirror inage you are used to. It hit my confidence massively and I wondered if people stared at me as I looked as though I had a medical issues. Now in my 30s and many compliments and nice pictures later, I got over it but I have a successful Instagram over the past year and when I record videos the correct way around my asymmetric features jump out at me and to me I look as though I have had a stroke. But I dont see this when I record with front cam or look in a mirror.

It's undeniable that my mouth slants higher one side and pulls the other side over which covers my teeth on one side more but I dont know how much it is noticed by other people.

People say 'well its because youre not used to seeing yourself that way' but in that case isn't it like looking at someone completely different? And in that instance I see someone with a wonky face!

I do take some comfort in the fact that everytime I have mentioned it to people they laugh at me for being ridiculous and tell me I dont gave a wonky face.

My husband sees it now though, that i talk more to one side. He says its only when we analyse it rather than it being a striking feature and he always caveats his honesty with a million compliments and tells me everyone says im beautiful (God I sound like I love myself here but this is what I am wrestling with - are they just being polite? Are they just saying it to make themselves feel virtuous that they see someone funny looking and call them beautiful?). Then even yesterday talking with my husband I said I think my mouth is odd because my nose was bent when I was younger (by my child bouncing intk my face on a trampoline and me not realising the extent of the injury!) to which my husband started scrutinising to see where the bend is, he hadn't ever noticed it

Has anyone worked at their face symmetry and improved it? I cant tell if I need masseter botox, lip work or a complete jaw realignment for my overbite (which in itself isn't a problem as my teeth are pretty straight). I also feel wuth my nose that it may need something as the nostrils and cebtre bit are misaligned which I think does affect my sinuses.

Or is this genuinely something everyone sees when they mirror flip themselves? I've just recorded some videos on front cam, they look fine. Mirror flipped them and its all wonky! This is what people really see!

"is this genuinely something everyone sees when they mirror flip themselves"

Yes.

Nobody is symmetrical. Stop mirror flipping.

Yes, I notice asymmetry on faces and there is something really attractive about it, like Amy Adams is a good example
natalie Dormer ?something from game of thrones
symmetry can be beautiful too,
I guess it’s so subjective to each individuals taste ?

I absolutely feel this way and it actually hurts my brain to try and work out what people see vs what I see. And it makes no sense at all to me that if people saw what I see when I look in the mirror, they’d see me differently to how they see me now. I do really think it’s because we get used to seeing ourselves a certain way and not because we are asymmetric gargoyles!

Everyone sees this when seeing their face the right way round. This is a huge problem with Instagram culture - people becoming obsessed with what they look and scrutinising their faces all the time.

Wow Natalie Dormer has a slightly more exaggerated version of exactly what I have, one sided talking and the other dragged over teeth and I actually girl crushed her in the Tudors when she was Anne Boleyn. That has really cheered me up, she doesn't look odd at all!!

This. Get off social media.

Yes this is me!! I thought noone else probably had this. If someone records a video its not as pronounced with but then im doing it myself lots to try and work out what people really see!

People look a bit different as a reflection. OP, I really wish for you that you could not give a shit about this. You are a person. You look like a person. That’s all there is to it. Don’t try to look like a piece of plastic or some filtered person or an AI person. Own your face - it’s yours. It functions - sees, smells, smiles. Don’t fuck around with it and try to forget about our toxic culture of looking like a plastic doll.

Yes, I have this when I see my 'true' face, but it really is only noticeable to you because it jars with your usual version of yourself. It cannot actually be worse just because it is flipped - that would make no sense. The left side of my face is ever so slightly larger than my right side - cheekbone, masseter, jaw, nose, all of it. A side parting and some layers around the face have made me feel better about it, but honestly I don't think anyone has ever noticed.

Look at someone you know well in a mirror, OP.

If you think other people give a shit about your face then please don't worry. They don't.

A symmetrical face would be highly abnormal. We all look weird when we flip the mirror. Stop thinking about it. That way madness lies.

I know, I know it has become worse since I started this but I make money from it too so its not a side hustle I'd want to quit. Even if i did I'd still be scrutinising, when I first noticed in approx 2005, there was no insta so my issues do pre-date that!

I know someone who talks on one side of their mouth and it is noticeable BUT it’s not a bad thing - it’s just something I associate with them now! Like if they had bright red hair or something along those lines. Just a feature. Everyone has something other people notice about them and we can’t control what that thing is!

You tend to fixate on so-called faults, in your 20s / 30s.
I know I did. It’s all part wanting to look good as possible.

Can imagine it’s much worse nowadays, with Insta etc…
You look fine they way you are, don’t get any stuff done!

I think when you become overly focused on anything it becomes an issue. I had Bell’s palsy a few years back (left side of face paralysed) I did recover but not 100%. I’m aware thst I need to focus on moving my face in a symmetrical way as it can start to look droopy on left especially when tired. A smile evens things up for me so I’ve had to adapt away from resting bitch face as I’m public facing.

There are exercises that work on symmetry and strength. I don’t think people see my face and think it’s wonky. I think if I pointed it out they’d start to snd once seen can’t be unseen.

Start mirror flipping everyone - both of you stand in front of a mirror and look at the person next to you in the mirror - they look really weird!!! My husband’s mirror face freaks me out! This doesn’t need fixing it’s completely normal

Or even better find a photo of someone you think is stunning and hold that up to the mirror then look at the reflection - bet they look odd too

No one except you cares what you look like. That’s the truth and understanding it will free you

I agree @gianfrancogorgonzola.

Learn to accept yourself as you are now. (You’ll wish you did as you get older and look back!!)

This is an instant fix! You are completely right. But how on earth does this work? Jenna Coleman who is stunning once flipped looks odd and asymmetrical - I dont get it, how is it I see it when flipped but not the regular way!?!?!

Also, not many people have images and vids staring straight into a camera!

This thread is therapy 🥰

The reason it looks so weird is that, for example, you're used to seeing that person with the left side of their lips tilted higher. When you flip the image it jars with what your brain thinks that person should look like - it doesn't just look neutral, it looks INCREDIBLY wonky because that left higher lip is now the lower than average lip.

And you think "Ew, what a wonky face". But people who see how you actually look would feel the same way ("Ew how wonky") looking at your reflection. It's because your brain isn't used to seeing that.

It doesn't actually mean you're any less attractive than what you see in the mirror.

But it's also true that no one really cares about how you look. Attraction is way way more about energy and charisma, even for women

I am quite sure there is nothing wrong with your face! Get out and about and live your life, and stop looking for problems where none exist, be interesting and interested in others and people will always find you attractive.

What a great example! I'd go as far as suggesting she'd look a bit boring without the assymetry.

I'm wonky as fuck but when I was younger it never held me back.

When I contrast two significant relationships in my life, I find both men very good looking. The symmetrical one had quite a catalogue model vibe when young, whereas the wonky one looked like a catwalk model or rock star. Neither is better looking, just different.

I worry about this and used to hide away a lot. I have a muscle wasting disease and I can’t smile properly only with one side, i cant emote well so people sort of look horrified when talking to me as my face does not move very well and almost looks like I’ve had heavy Botox. Im tired of hiding away like Quasimodo though and this year is my year of not caring.

I bet you are gorgeous op, just having to do your clips/pics has made you over analyse as you have to look at yourself a lot.