Change in perosnal style - natural changes or midlife crisis?

8 replies

Drcrafty · 03/03/2025 16:31

Hi everyone - I did search for a similar topic but couldn't find one. A little background - I am almost 50, love clothes and have always enjoyed buying and wearing nice clothes. I have always been very overweight, and still am, but despite this have always pretty much liked myself and thought that when i made an effort, I looked good. I am losing weight now - 2 stone stone and many more to go, but I am hopeful that I will continue to be successful. The thing that is confusing me, is that my style used to be a bit boho but polished - lots of maxi dresses, bold colours, Monsoon was a favourite shop. Now, I find myself buying things.....differently. I don't fancy wearing my dresses and seem to be preferring a more styled, pared down look. Wide leg trousers or nice jeans, fitted top and knitted cardigan or jumper, still colour but less pattern and print. As I sort through my wardrobe I am giving a lot to the charity shop and setting aside the other decent bits to sell. So far, so good of course but my fear is that this change is temporary and I am going to deeply regret getting rid of everything that doesn't fir my current state. Is this an age thing? A stage of life thing? (Happily married, love my fairly responsible job). A menopause side effect or a weight loss thing?

Apologies - I am rambling, but I would love to know if anyone has been through the same issue and has any insight. I am shopping at the lower end of prices (high st) to test out the items I am drawn to now - and am feeling excited about putting outfits together. Anyone got any thoughts?

OP posts:

DelphiniumBlue · 03/03/2025 16:41

I’m in my sixties, 18-20, and grey.
I used to love Boho style but I ve found it doesn’t work well once you look, how can I put it, more faded. Messy doesn’t work for me anymore. Which is a shame.
What works better now is something sharper. I do still wear dresses, sometimes flowy ones, but I’m careful not to wear pastels. Bright colours like red and orange seem to work well, and I’m a bit more careful about grooming and makeup .
It’s not do much that my taste has changed, it’s more that beachy boho doesn’t cut it anymore, just makes me look scruffy rather than laid back!

marthaisintheway · 03/03/2025 17:06

I'm 63 and agree with pp. I've always been a bit boho, love Monsoon, but have had to alter it a bit as I've got older. I think pastel, lacey flowing frocks can look a bit Miss Havesham if you're not careful.
I tend to wear the same silhouette but steer clear of flowers and twirly bits. I like blocks of colours. So today I wore an animal print long skirt, red jumper,red socks and dm clog thingys (that's an official term).
I'm a size 16-18, if that helps.

henlake7 · 03/03/2025 19:29

I wouldnt spend alot of money if you are mid weight loss journey TBH. I found that my style changed alot once I lost weight in my 50s. I used to wear more athleisure type stuff in quite neutral colours but it didnt really appeal to me nowadays.
Even the things I wore mid weight loss arent my style now. Now (8-10) Im all about retro/vintage, patterns, colours...basically all the things I was too scared to wear when younger!!LOL

Bimblebombzle · 03/03/2025 20:24

I could have written this and I'm 44! I found myself in Cos today thinking wow this is the shop for me, whereas before I've just been generally confused by Cos! I'm interested in the silhouette and natural fabrics.

Really interesting points OP. I think for me some of it is being driven by fashion - wide leg trousers demand boxy or sculpted tops. I also think the two dominant (broadly) styles in modern fashion seem to minimalism and boho, although that could be nonsense! I wouldn't abandon boho pieces you love especially in your colours/textures/quality, but maybe go with one boho piece on a more minimalist outfit? Go with your heart. I am also a fan of boxing things away - if you haven't thought about it for 6-12 months then let it go after that. Also looking at a piece you can't get rid of - why, what does it do in your wardrobe, can you update it with something that feels more you etc.

I had my colours done professionally when I turned 40 and how I intend to rock style is through colour.

Bimblebombzle · 03/03/2025 20:24

I had my colours done professionally when I turned 40 and how I intend to rock style is through colour.

jeaux90 · 04/03/2025 05:54

I'm 53 and have a decent career, my workstyle changed a lot over the last few years.

I'm now a no heels person and I'm always wearing nice wide leg trousers or suits/cigarette pants.

I buy nice trainers like Nero Giardini etc

I'm all about comfort but with a touch of class/trendy

Original poster

Drcrafty · 05/03/2025 12:56

Thanks everyone - I am guessing the message is - change is inevitable and as I am enjoying it, there isn't really a problem!

OP posts:

Floisme · 05/03/2025 14:52

My thoughts are that change is indeed inevitable but that it isn't always permanent. I've changed my style quite a few times and at first I used to think that was it and that I'd be dressing in this new way for the rest of my life. Now I've realised that not only was this delusional but also that I'm as likely to go back as I am forward, e.g. I've done androgyny and boho at least twice, albeit in different ways each time.

Of course you can't keep it all, but there are many things that I've got rid of and that - even allowing for changes in size and shape - I've deeply regretted 10 or even 20 years later. The trouble is, I also find it very hard to predict what's worth keeping and what isn't. So I don't have any easy answers but nevertheless, before parting with an item, I'd scrutinise the condition and the quality and bear in mind that you may not be able to afford to replace it, like for like, in years to come.

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