"Dress to impress" dress code for 9 year old girl

[HornungTheHelpful]

My niece has to go to a "dress to impress" party for her posh 9 year old cohort. She is struggling a little at school at the moment and I would like to send her an outfit. Any ideas? She is very blonde and pale.

Op, I wish I had an aunt like you when I was nine

Bloody hell, it only means dress up. I suppose if you want to analyse every word, then no, 9 years old shouldn't be trying to impress, but by and large, it's just a phrase and a memo to wear your finery.

Some people, including children, are really into clothes. Mine has been since she was one! Yes, one! She has always been attracted to clothes - not all girly, frilly stuff either, but she took a shine to particular things and wanted to wear them from a very young age, it's not inappropriate or all about Instagram.

Talk about suck the fun out of everything.

That sounds like a great outfit and she can wear all of the components again in different ways.
Hope she has fun

Surely ‘Dress to Impress’ just means make an effort?
ie don’t show up in a Tshirt & joggers if that’s what you usually wear.

I read ‘got the memo’ in this context as being analogous not literal.
Ie many of the guests were on trend with bomber jackets but not all.
Not that a select few were told in advance.
people’s English comprehension is really poor nowadays.

9 year olds do have different personal styles even though their parents might have quite a big input in them. When I was a teaching assistant it was very noticeable on non-uniform days. Some girls were into frills and the closest thing to high heels they could get away with, some just wore jeans and hoodies, some liked sportswear, some wore something a bit more unusual. My first thought for this age and theme would be something a bit sparkly, but for all I know her friends might be more impressed if she had the latest football shirt. I definitely don't think she'd be teased or made to feel out of place for having something sparkly, though.

If by 'struggling' you mean a group of bitchy girls are picking on her then it will not matter one iota what she wears as they will sneer at her whatever she has on. She could be totally catwalk ready and they would still laugh at her outfit if they've decided she's their target. If the party invite has come from a child who is being mean to her at school then I would teach her that she doesn't have to try and impress people who don't appreciate her and go and do something nice with her on the day of the party instead.

I'm currently rewatching an old 'masterchef junior USA' where a couple of 8 year olds are rocking their own style. One has her hair in a bun and at least one string of pearls, the other has bob and a range of bandannas.

Some children are in to clothes, some prefer dinosaurs some like both.

At 9 I wore black satin trousers to a youth club disco but also the Adam Ant pirate outfit consisting of white frilly shirt and maroon velvet knicker bockers. Me and at least 3 other girls had the same outfit.

My initial thought was that people were over-thinking this. "Dress to impress" to me just seems like an offhand way of saying "wear something nice-looking", rather than anything sinister.

However, if the girl whose party it is is into the Roblox "Dress to Impress" game, then this is a very bad theme to put on the invitation. There are several probolems.

First, the game itself is horribly shallow and encourages an unhealthy obsession with appearance.

Second, choosing this theme excludes people whose parents don't let them play the game.

The third issue with a Roblox Dress to Impress themed party, though, is that it isn't really a theme at all. Depending on the theme in a particular session of the game, players could be dressed as anything from a farmhand to Marie Antoinette. So, you could wear anything and meet the theme.

Fourth, there's a risk the party girl will have decided a more specific theme for the party with her closer friends (just as there is a more specific theme in a Dress to Impress game) and those not meeting it end up feeling left out.

Fifth, the game involves players voting on others' outfits and overall appearance. This is relatively harmless in the game as everyone is represented by a similar basic avatar and you're judging the players' choices of how to decorate the avatar. But if the party degenerates into "Dress to Impress IRL" with children judging each other's looks, this could get very nasty.

Came on here to offer advice but I see you've sorted it. What you've picked out sounds fab and I hope she has a lovely time.

The whole premise of dress to impress is each round is a different theme so how could you have a party where the theme is 'robolox dress to impress'? That isn't a theme its the name of the game!

Dress as an intelligent and interesting 9 year old?

I read ‘got the memo’ in this context as being analogous not literal.
Ie many of the guests were on trend with bomber jackets but not all.
Not that a select few were told in advance.
people’s English comprehension is really poor nowadays.

I did not think that there was an actual memo. I didn't think it was necessary to point that out as it is so very clear.

This sounds great! You’ve been really thoughtful to your niece and I’m sure she’ll look and feel great.

Any chance you could post the link to the skirt please? Sounds like my daughter would love it!

Ah, OP!

When I was 10/11, I was being raised by my strict dad and very lovely, but conservative grandmother. My clothes always stood out for the wrong reasons.

I remember being sooo happy when any of my aunties bought me clothes. They were always bang on and it just made me feel that little bit better about myself.

Then when my dad had a new girlfriend, she took me birthday shopping. I don't have particularly nice memories of their relationship, but I still remember to this day what we picked out, right down to the two pairs of earrings, and even a pair of chunky heels! I wore it all to death.

You've done such a good thing, and I've no doubt your niece will always remember it.

You are a good aunt and this girl is going to need you in the coming years if her mother doesn't pull the finger out.

Yes, she's only nine now, and the theme of this party doesn't seem appropriate if taken at face value. If it's the Roblox thing, the child will be embarrassed if it turns out she doesn't know what Roblox is.

Her mother really needs to admit reality is a thing. She should be the one concerned about the child who's struggling in school and figuring this kind of stuff out for her.

Ignore the haters.

This bears repeating:
Being yourself is absolutely wonderful. If, however, you are acutely aware that "yourself" is considered somehow lacking, then a bit of war paint or camouflage...can be a really good thing for confidence

You are doing this child a huge favour, and I hope you can be an available presence in her life in the next few years. It's sad for a child when a parent doesn't see her as an individual, separate from her own identity.

What would that look like to you?