Gray hair but wavering….colour ideas without having to grow out again.

[baffledmummy]

I’ve been growing my colour out for the last 2 years. I am naturally brunette with reddish undertones. It is now chin length and would say I’m about 30-40% gray. Sometime I like it but I got a passport photo taken yesterday and I washed and styled my hair before it…but…. I look…unkempt and OLD (I mean I look my age but in comparison to what we are socially conditioned to think a 47 year old looks like, am definitely not that!). I’d like to maybe experiment with colouring again but can’t bear the thought of a grow out demarcation line or having to dye my hair every month to hide the roots. I’ve had highlights before and didn’t mind them but don’t think (but needed toning frequently given my red undertones) so probably a bit too high on the maintenance factor for me. Semi-permanents seem to suck right into my hair and will create a demarcation line which I will have to grow out. I’ve tried those wash in shampoos with no luck (they don’t make a difference). Any suggestions or things I haven’t thought of yet? I almost think it would look better if I was 100% gray.

No advice I’m afraid, but I’m in exactly the same boat! Glad I let the greys grow out, but now I don’t love the overall colour look. I too have thought about actually just dying it all grey (I know Sali Hughes did this), but I’m not sure I’m up for the maintenance.

Maybe have your stylist add some lowlights? When done strategically it can make the gray strands sort of "pop" like a natural highlight. Very low maintenance.

I used Bleach Fade to Grey for a while when I was trying to blend the colours in. It's a kind of graphite colour so it cools down the brunette and darkens the grey that's growing in so there's less of a contrast. My hairdresser was quite impressed with it and recommended it to some other clients trying to go grey (she doesn't do colour services herself).

Having said that I did keep my hair shorter than yours until it had properly grown out. Do perservere. I love my hair colour now and could kick myself for not having done it years ago.

Could it be the cut or the 'quality' or your hair that made you look unkempt in the photo? Rather than the colour. I've stopped having highlights so I can try to improve my hair quality/texture.

I'm 58 and have a bob with balayage, brown smudged roots then into blonde highlights (you could go copper or a lighter brown if you dont like blonde).
I keep on top of my roots by either using a root hairdye and just dabbing around my hair line and my parting in between professional colouring, I also use a washout mascara type root touch up (Superdrug)
I also use toners from Superdrug to keep my blonde bright.
I find it's really easy to maintain

I like the idea of this but I am not sure my hair is white enough to make a difference with lowlights if you know what I mean? I think I’d need to be >50%. I’d definitely consider it further down the line.

I don’t know…I mean passport photos are notoriously unflattering and I think trying to hold a “neutral pose” just accentuated my frown lines and my hair colour made me look quite washed out. I’d made an effort with my makeup too! I just had my hair cut recently. Admittedly in the style I’ve had (and liked!) for the last 10+ years so maybe I need to try something different with my new greys.

I grew out my dyed brown hair during lockdown and it is now naturally white at the front and grey at the back. I didn't like the white at all but have now discovered Bleach London Fade to Grey as mentioned upthread. It's a shampoo (looks black) that I use twice a week. My hair is now a mix of a gorgeous shiny grey colour and a subtle purple. I love it and feel so much better and will use it forever

I like the idea of this but I am not sure my hair is white enough to make a difference with lowlights if you know what I mean? I think I’d need to be >50%. I’d definitely consider it further down the line

Same here😂If my hair would cooperate and turn a pretty white right in the front I'd use lowlights and let the grey be my highlight. But nooooo...so I'm blonde for now.

Have you ever considered longish "curtain bangs/fringe"? Nice way to update your style if you want something a little different. Flattering as well.

I’ve been using the lighter shades of elumen - it doesn’t lift your hair colour at all so for me it dyes the whites but doesn’t change the browns, and on my hair it fades out slowly so there’s not a sharp demarcation line. I put a mixture of half vinegar half water on my hair first to get it to stick.

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@Tremping and @ForPearlViper thansk for the recommendations…is it just the shampoo and conditioner you use or do you use the toner kit too? I’ve just looked online and they are out of stock…I’ve added my email to the waitlist 🙂

baffledmummy I just use the shampoo. I did buy the condition but it looked very purple and the shampoo was supplying as much purpleness as I wanted. I get it via click and collect from Boots.

Manjistha powder mixed into your conditioner might give your whites/greys a red enough tinge to blend in with the rest of your hair.

I used the toner. I've never used the shampoo and conditioner.

It's in stock at Boots. Do bear in mind it is quite cool/ashy in colour and will tone down your red undertones. I liked this as I've spent my life trying to avoid anything that puts red tones in my hair as they don't suit me!