Need bra fitting help for my autistic daughter - any advice please 😊

[Icantpeopleanymore]

My daughter is 14 and has followed in my footsteps unfortunately...she already is wearing a 28H bra. I am in around a 30/32J so I understand how to get them to fit well and whilst I've been able to work out over the years and lots of bras which size and brand I can wear comfortably, we are struggling to get her in the right one.

She's currently in a Cleo panache t shirt bra, as she's not happy with patterns or lace of any kind. Coping ok with the underwires, but won't really tolerate lace or anything she sees as being itchy.
It's fitting ok, but I do feel like the moulded cups aren't quite stretchy enough or fitting well enough. 28 back seems to be pretty perfect for her. Fairly certain after trying lots of combinations that we have that right, but she saying the underarms are too high and are rubbing.

She's really struggled with her confidence and self image (cutting, anorexia etc) over the last few years and I'm just so happy to see her being comfortable with looking at bras and being willing to get one that fits properly, I don't want her to feel uncomfortable as then she will just go back to her awful badly fitting sports bras that aren't giving her enough support, she's already got stretch marks on her chest because of the speed with which they have grown and EDS which makes skin thin and stretchy...I remember this age and being acutely aware of having a larger bust and how horrible it can be to feel like people are looking or that it's restrictive in terms of clothing etc.

Any advice, or brands we can try? She gets pretty fed up with trying lots on even at home, hates shops due to crowds, we have no bravissimo near us either.

My DD is a 34f. She wears a Marks smooth bra. Bravisimo is the only brand I know that does a very small back.
Miss Mary has a new smooth bra without wires but only to a H cup.
My daughter is SEN and won't do a fitting but will show me now when trying on at home.
Bio oil will reduce the stretch marks.

Thanks! Yes, mark's do a 28 back but not up to an H cup, I'll look at the other one. She gets so stressed out by the attention of trying them on, it's a nightmare. I feel her pain with the high sides too, really bloody annoying. I've looked at all the shapermint and lemonade dolls bras that have no wires and are stretchy, but those things are never made for a small back size.

Bravissimo Freya idol think it's called. Simple, smooth padded and I don't find it comes too high at the sides

Oh dear I don’t hsve much advice but just to say I really feel for her. I can’t tolerate normal bras and am grateful every day for my small bust so I can wear non wired crop top type ones.

primark do lots of different styles of bras-some made from that tencel(?) fabric which seems much nicer to me than lace or satin. Maybe try there?

Freya is always good. For something different though look at Lemonade Dolls, no underwire, most are lace but they have a couple of tencel ones.

Thanks all I'll have a look. Primark no good, no where on the high street does the sizes she or I need. I did look at lemonade dolls but I found their website really confusing and they don't seem to do them in a small enough back. Going to phone bravissimo as the do online video fitting, however it's unlikely she would be ok to be on camera with them.

I hate my bust most days, it drives me mad trying to find bras and I lived throughout my teen years in really badly fitting bras as it just wasn't a thing then to have a range of sizes, so I'm just glad there is such a range, I just find it completely overwhelming!

Bravissimo were very good with my youngest DD…..she has multiple surgical scars (RTA and various run ins with oncology surgeons thanks to benign bone tumours) Some have keloids which make fitting extra difficult. her confidence in her body was knocked for six and she finds most bras very uncomfortable and difficult to try on. Staff at Bravissimo take their time with her, have been very sensitive to her extra needs, ask if she needs help from outside the door as they are aware she may find it difficult to do up some bras and her extreme anxiety of people she does not know even seeing her worst scars. Might be worth asking if your Dd could just visit the shop, see the fitting rooms and hear how the staff would do a fitting, create a social story for her and arrange for a fitting during a quiet time for the shop with someone who is sensitive to customers with extra needs.

Molke.

Definitely cater for small band/ big cup.

Brastop.com has a great range and free returns so if you can shell out upfront for a big delivery and return what doesn’t suit that might work?