Do you also have very wide shoulders? What do you wear?

[BrakesOff]

I spent years trying to lose weight to fit into clothes that just weren't the right shape for me until I finally realised that it was my wide shoulders that meant that anything fitted just wasn't going to work. It's worse when I'm fitter and stronger but even at my skinniest my shoulders are man-sized!

I can't wear women's fitted jumpers, tops or jackets, dresses with tight armholes or anything with fitted shoulders. I have to size up but then it's often unflattering lower down and I look like I have a massive waist too 😂

Anyone else got a similar struggle, and what do you wear? Am trying to buy fewer, better clothes so want them to be right, but I've made so many bad choices over the years.

If I could just wear tucked in vest tops all the time it would be fine but as autumn comes I'll have my usual struggle with what to wear and as always end up wearing the same baggy jumpers!

I have this issue and have fully leaned into an 80s silhouette over the last couple of years with oversized shirts, jumpers and T shirts, usually with a fitted Lycra style skirt or fitted trousers. I will buy shirts a size or two up if necessary and will happily wear men’s shirts too. I think it suits me since I’ve lost some weight, when I was bigger it would’ve probably been less flattering. You could also buy tops a size bigger and get the sides taken in - apparently this isn’t massively expensive.

I found out I’m a ‘flamboyant natural’ in the Kibbe style system and I must say since I figured this out I have been absolutely loving my broad shoulders and enjoy picking clothes that show them off: it’s a great system as you’re encouraged to think of these things as a blessing to be worked with rather than something to disguise - it really changed how I feel about my body shape.

I buy from German and Scandi brands. Esprit, Cos and Arket are all cut for larger frames, and I'm sure there are more. UK brands seem to be cut for big busts and rounder stomachs in the large sizes, and I find French, Italian, Spanish etc tend to be too short and tight on the shoulders whatever the size.

Yes! I have a wide skeleton, so wide that I look ill at a size 10 and was anorexic.

Ok, I have some reading to do here! Never heard of this. 80s style often works for me, particularly batwing. I'm definitely not flamboyant though!

This is interesting - Cos is my only go-to that I can hope will be flattering. Not everything but more of their pieces than any other brand. I haven't looked at Esprit.

Sorry to hear this @Disturbia81. The size of my skeleton has made me want to lose weight for years, but even at a size 8 in non-stretchy jeans I can only wear fitted tops in a 16 or I can't move my arms!

I have this shape, I also came out as a flamboyant natural in the test, I find the only dresses I can wear are of a stretch material, nothing that is Taylored ever fits my shoulders bust, unless I size up then its too big on the waist hips.

Googling flamboyant natural and seems to be my type exactly, really interesting.

I've found my people! At school I was 7.5 stone, size 8 hips and a 14 on top due to shoulders! Off to look up a flamboyant natural....

When you read the description of flamboyant natural it sounds quite unflattering but really it doesn’t mean ‘built like a brick shithouse’ - just that you have a strong vertical line (over 5’6”) and that you have width in your shoulders and ribcage. You can still have a small waist, curvy hips etc and look feminine. But instead of trying to make yourself look narrower or more petite, you try to dress in a that honours your width and height. I really recommend looking into it a bit for a fresh perspective.

Also was gonna say that i buy quite a lot of vintage 80s and early 90s jackets and dresses; shoulder pads are surprisingly flattering as they seem to kind of sharpen the line down from my shoulder and make it look neat and intentional. I love jackets with big shoulders and the waist nipped in as well as longer wider styles that sort of hang down from the widest part

massive shoulders here too!!

I prefer men’s jumpers as they fit so much better and are just way more flattering. Can’t explain exactly how or where they flatter more than women’s jumpers but perhaps it’s because with a women’s jumper I would need to buy a huge size and then have it all baggy and shapeless over my stomach and hips, whereas I can find men’s jumpers that fit my shoulders AND my much narrower hips. (I also basically have no waist, I don’t go in and out there, just massive shoulders and then narrowing down to the hips… it’s tricky!!)

Agree that Scandi brands are great, especially if you want to wear dresses. It has taken me years to find dress styles that work but finally I have! I like shirt dress styles (never belted, as that just accentuates my non existent waist) or sack/smock styles. But the latter only really work when I’m my usual size 10/12, if I creep up a size after a long period of crap eating/not moving enough then sack styles just make me look larger. They work great otherwise though.

Blazers and other masculine tailoring also work. I’ve recently discovered a love of pleated wide trousers, the sort of thing they wear in eg Brideshead Revisited, with either a pretty top or a mannish shirt. Obviously you have to be careful not to look like you’re actually dressing as a man (unless that’s what you want!!) but somehow it weirdly works, I feel much more feminine dressing that way than if I were to try to squeeze my body into a feminine dress that makes me look like a rugby player!!!

I am so grateful for this. It really helps to read these ideas being shared.

@ShadesOfPemberley do you buy men's shirts too? I have great loose shirts from Cos but when worn with pleated baggy trousers I do rather billow 😂

Wear anything that let's your shoulders be free, the worst thing you can do with a wide frame is confine it in something tight. It makes you feel uncomfortable and it makes your frame look bigger. Think princess Diana's in her off the shoulder black dress. She had a wide natural shape and she was a knock out when she let those shoulders out. Look up David Kibbie - you sound like a natural type - you will get lots of good ideas from him.

I'm broad-shouldered, tall and muscular too, and I also find 80s silhouettes work well for me. It's all that power dressing - quite masculine lines, but flowy and voluminous cuts. Look up Kirsty Alley, Kathleen Turner, Sigourney Weaver and Angelica Huston for inspiration. For current looks, no-one has better shoulders than Michelle Obama.

The great thing about having good shoulders is that clothes hang really nicely. I've realised after years of trying that pretty just doesn't work for me - I'm never going to pull it off, and I always look awkward. I've learned to embrace the bold, statuesque and comfortable, and it makes me feel confident.

Agree that the Scandi brands are built for Viking women, and I find Massimo Dutti often has good cuts for me. Wide-leg trousers, mid-calf pencil skirts, silk or linen shirts, oversize blazers and jumpers are my staples, as well as kaftans in the summer (it's hot where I live, and Margo Leadbetter is my spirit animal).

Omg this is what I have, it’s very limiting. Bloody wide shoulders, I spend winters in leggings and oversized sweatshirts and summers in oversized boxy T-shirts and shorts.

I've embraced billow and I look better for it. We have been conditioned from birth to believe that the main aim of women's fashion is to diminish us - to look smaller, take up less space.

Those of us who came of age in the 90s were presented with one feminine ideal - skinny as fuck.

Thankfully, the body positivity movement has allowed other shapes and builds to do fashion. My philosophy is I'm here, I'm taking up space, deal with it.

But on a less esoteric note, when I wear high-waisted wide-leg trousers with a shirt, I usually only do up two buttons in the middle of the shirt. It creates a very casual Empire line.

Part Two is another Scandi brand that works for my (partly Scandi) frame…

I'd ignore the Kibbe thing. There are only 2 options if you're over 5.6 which really isn't tall.

I'm a swimmer so really recognise your issues. I felt ok until breast feeding and now have saggy breasts in unflattering nursing bras. Looking forward to going back to being flat chested! I wear patterned mens shirts, batwing tops, roll necks, lots of Cos stuff, and boxy tweed blazers. I mostly dress like an archeology professor.

I can also recommend a shopping holiday to NL where women are generally a bit more solid! Dutch brands that work well for me include Claudia Sträter, Vanilia, WE and Sissy Boy. Most of my clothes actually come from H&M though

I have wide-ish shoulders - I like them actually but they definitely don't need to look wider than they are - so the absolutely key thing I find is avoiding drop shoulders - look for a seam that sits on your shoulder; and secondly wide-ish legged trousers or skirts on with some volume on the bottom so you are balanced out.

As well as having broad shoulders I spent much of my youth as a competitive swimmer, so I have lots of muscles there too. I look to other former swimmers for inspiration. Sharron Davies is a good example.

For shirts I tend to go for soft fabrics that will stretch. I’m currently wearing the Selby jersey shirt from FatFace. I have it in several colours. I avoid round or crew necks. Wide shoulders and big boobs need a bit of a V to offset them. Another vote for wide leg trousers. The M&S wide leg jeans are surprisingly stylish