Not a suitable candidate for Botox?!

[SinkingFeelingSoph]

So I’m 47 and have Botox and am generally happy with it (although one eye usually looks a bit smaller, it’s worth it)

My lower face is drooping and hollow so I sent some photos to a top London injector (on tv, really natural work). I actually joked that she’s say straight to facelift - and that’s what she did say! She said I was a bad candidate for Botox and wouldn’t touch me due to eye laxity (it’s never bothered me or I’ve never noticed apart from post-Botox droop) and that I’d be better off with an eye lift and also a facelift, as cheek filler could exacerbate some bags under my eyes (that I’d never noticed either). Its made me feel like absolute shit to be honest!

Surely filler is a step before surgery? Does anyone know what her issue was? I look fairly reasonable for my age - is so I thought! She mentioned it was skin laxity rather than muscle but isn’t that usual?

Ultimately she is a sales person, so she wants you to spend as much as possible. Also a professional and doesn't want to do something she knows you won't be happy with.

@Doggymummar thabks but that makes me feel worse as she doesn’t offer what she suggested. Unless she gets a referral fee!

I honestly think anyone suggesting all that work to a 47 yo sounds pretty unethical!
Go to someone who understands you don't want to go down the surgical route.
Don't be pressured into getting stuff you'd never wanted to previously.

I watch quite a few YouTube videos by American plastic surgeons and one of them (Dr Karim I think) really advises against women in their late thirties and forties from getting fillers. He says it ages them and doesn't make you look younger.
I don't think it's automatically true that fillers are the correct first step before surgery.
I think it's good the person you went to advised against fillers and Botox and didn't just inject you and take your money!

It's just a professional opinion -
just go to someone else!!

"My lower face is drooping and hollow"

Botox doesn't really help with that, though, does it? I don't think so. Have you looked into thread lift?

@sunshinechaser interesting. I hate the look of obvious fillers but friends with similar issues have had very subtle ones that has just freshened them up and aren’t noticeable

I dont know why you would be surprised at someone who wants to sell you stuff trading on your insecurity to sell you stuff.

Just because it looks okay on friends doesn't mean it will on you.

Thats why I went to her for a consult as I’d never had filler before. I’m happy re the Botox for forehead. Will look into threadlift

Because she wasn’t selling me anything - she doesn’t offer those procedures (but did try referring me to people who do)

You do not need to spend money "fixing" your face. Don't be conned by the charlatans. They are preying on your insecurities.

And fillers don't look like a "freshen up" at all, OP. Even when supposedly natural they are incredibly obvious and the effect worsens with age. It's never worth the risk that you'll look absolutely awful in 5 years due to the artificial stretching

Nevertheless. It would be " I scratch your back you scratch mine" thing.

Personally I think it's all a giant Ponzi scheme built on women's fear of ageing.

And ofc she gets a referral fee!

I think this was the video I was referring to. He says fillers don't help skin laxity at all.
I'll caveat this by saying I've had fillers in my face and I've been generally happy with them. But I know I'll get a facelift probably when I'm around 60!

You sound a bit like me OP. I've been having Botox for a few years, initially I just wanted quite deep number 11 lines done but they told me that would look weird so I ended up with the full forehead thing. I did once have my crows feet done but looked completely dead behind the eyes so didn't do that again!

However, I'm not wondering if I'm not actually that great a candidate for Botox. The effect on the number 11s is exactly what I wanted but the above-eye Botox pushes my brows down and I have hooded eyes so these look worse. As my lower face ages I also see a disconnect between the totally smooth upper face and the lower face which is aging as you would expect for a skinny woman in her 40s.

This effect is kind of what they suggested would happen if I just had the number 11s done but on a bigger scale. So I think I'm going to lay off it next time and just have the number 11s done like I wanted.

Anyway, I do think there are some people for whom Botox isn't really the answer and more surgical measures would get better results. There's pretty much nothing you can do about lower face droop other than a facelift, I wouldn't touch threads myself - I've done some research and lots of Drs don't like them. Fillers don't really seem like the answer and I'm terrified of the pillow face thing myself!

I'm not surprised they tried to up-sell you though, it's what they do. Don't let it dent your confidence though, they're not looking at your face objectively - they are looking at it as something to be fixed.

I think I’m reading a different thread than some on here- the consultant you spoke to clearly is a big name who doesn’t need to chase for business enough that she’s not prepared to do a procedure she knows will look shit just to take your money.

she’s given you her professional opinion - fillers won’t fix the problem you want fixing, or they will but will look shit. That you are better off having a different procedure if you want to fix that problem, but unfortunately she doesn’t offer that particular procedure.

think of it this way, your face will be her sales pitch, her marketing, she knows if she does what you want, it will be bad advertising for her and is better for her career to turn you down as a client.

Listen to what she said. Filler won’t look good, it might have worked for your friend but you are not your friend. This expert is saying no.

You can decide if you want a lower lift or not, or you can go to a different person for filler and take the risk that this expert is right and it’ll look shit.

You've been given an opinion by someone who is (I'm assuming) a medic and respected in their field

Of course nobody 'needs' any work but when you approach an aesthetics doctor asking for their opinion, you're going to get that

I'm another one who thinks she was just giving professional advice, not necessarily trying to insult you. Please don't take it personally.

Botox and fillers can only do so much, if skin laxity is a problem then only surgery will really fix it. Fine if you don't want to go down that route but she was probably just being realistic and steering you away from unrealistic expectations around what botox/fillers can do.

Also, don't go near threads, I have hears loads of horror stories about them.

My take is she is being ethical and professional to turn you away if she is not able to achieve what you want with fillers.

You don't know whether she is getting a referral fee but if her solution is a facelift, the chances of you getting a facelift are pretty low - due to the cost differential - so she is not likely to earn that referral fee at all.

If she was unethical, she would take the bird in hand (filler) rather than two in the bush (referral fee).

I believe cosmetic surgeons, should you go for a face lift, prefer to operate on a face that has not had tons of fillers and threads etc. The best results are for a face that is clean of those things.

Personally, if it is skin laxity, turkey neck, baggy under chin, jowls and hooded eyes due to aging, I would save up for a deep plane facelift and eye lift at a later age, which IMO is more natural looking and lasts the longest.

You have already said u gave an eye issue so the Botox u have had will look very unnatural, u could end up looking freaky if u have what else u think u need doing, sounds like yr options are leaving it as it is or a facelift.

I recently got referred by a clinician and later found out they took around 100% markup on the referral… lots of money for very little work. This was a completely different area of medicine - nothing to do with aesthetics - but I was shocked. Obviously can’t know for sure about your situation, but I wouldn’t underestimate a referral fee as a possible motivation.

I can’t speak with any authority on the procedures you’re asking about, but I hope you find the right thing for you. And hopefully you can ignore the judgy posters who think they are soooo incredibly enlightened and progressive by virtue of being anti-Botox/filler/surgery 🙄 let people do what they want with their faces ffs!

I did a lot of Botox and fillers and they can't solve everything. She's down the right thing and refused you if she feels that you're not going to get the results you want.

She's obviously in a position to cherry pick her cases as well.