Has anyone "embraced the grey" successfully?

[CaptainOliviaBenson]

I've been dyeing my hair since I was 12. My roots have been fully grey/white since I was in my late twenties. I'm now 46 and the state of my hair after 30 years of (mostly) home dyeing, perms, treatments and heat styling is absolutely awful!

Ever since I had my youngest nearly 18 years ago my hair has been thinning mostly on top. (It used to be really thick and curly). It's that thin on top now that I have to wear it up in a ponytail when I leave the house to cover my baldy patches.

My hair is currently dark brown (natural colour was dark blonde) and my grey roots are coming through so quickly that I'm dyeing them every 2 weeks! I feel like I'm making the condition of my hair so much worse because I'm dyeing it so frequently.

My little sister (41) embraced her grey 6 months ago and it looks fantastic! Although the transition was a lot easier for her as she'd been dyeing her hair light blonde for over a decade so you can't really tell until you get quite close because her hair still looks blonde.

Do I stop dyeing my hair and just let the grey come through? I did try once before around 2 years ago where I didn't dye my roots for around 3 months and it looked bloody awful! 😬 I just don't suit light coloured hair at all! My other dilemma is it's my stepdaughter's wedding in 3 months and I'm (technically) mother of the bride and sitting at the top table. I don't want to look an awful old hag! 🤦🏻‍♀️

The pink looks fab!

Following as I’m off to the hairdresser tomorrow. I desperately want to grow my grey out as the condition is so bad now (long hair, mid brown/orangy now). Haven’t dyed since last October but have to try and find a new job so need to look professional. Will maybe ask for highlights then at the top? Will post before and after pics.

I got fed up with dying mine in my early 50’s; I started going grey at 18.
My hairdresser did lighter and lighter lowlights as the dye grew out then I got it cut really short to get rid of the remaining colour.
I was silver by my mid 50’s and have remained so ever since!

I think having lovely glowing skin makes a huge difference to how grey hair looks so if it was me I might leave my hair colour largely alone until after the wedding except maybe professional colour and cut with a view to starting the greying process, and up my skin care game.

I've gone short and lilac!

Find a good hairdresser and take their advice. Mine is very clever with mixing colours and only ever colouring the roots.

Explain about the wedding and have lovely hair on the day and then consider how to proceed.

A lighter colour will be easier to grow out and might be more summery. If you don’t like it grey you can always have it coloured and try again later?

Have a wonderful time at the wedding and decide about your hair later 🌞

That’s stunning! Love it 🥰

Her a hairdresser to dye it grey, with silver highlights. It'll look fab. For your wedding. Then the grey can grow in, you can see what you've got, and then adjust any highlights or let it go natural, as you choose. Or maybe go completely grey, but a couple of occasional silver highlights. It's not forbidden!

I think Queen Elizabeth (the second) carried it off very well, but perhaps the crown distracted one's eye.

Have you thought of wearing one of those?

It's hard, I'm in 52 I have grown out all my solid dye and have a mixture of grey hair and blonde highlights. My hair is much better condition and it's loads cheaper to get high lights every 6 months rather than regular dyeing. A friend did say to me oh you look great, if you got rid of that grey hair you would look 45. I am quite happy with being 52, it did knock my confidence and resolve a bit though .

Absolutely love that! Would you mind posting photos of the cut? It looks great and similar to what I was thinking about longer term. Does it need much maintenance day to day? How is it as it grows out (the cut not the colour)...

I haven’t dyed for 9 months. I’m naturally very dark. My hair is tied up here so you can see the dark brown of my longer hair against the roots which are getting increasingly grey. It’s frustrating because it’s not a lovely silver colour which I’d hope for.

im torn between being patient and breaking the dye out.

I went grey at 54 not planned but my hair colorists LOA rolled right into Covid so I just stopped coloring it. I love it. It’s the best thing I have done with or for my hair. It’s healthier grows better looks better and more natural and I receive many compliments particularly from younger people. And the time money effort can go to another facet
of your appearance. You were given good advice up thread…see a color specialist explain the timeline and goals with wedding be first and foremost. Also my DM stopped coloring her hair young and her sisters who continue to color into their 80s have dementia but not her. It’s my own theory but surely all those chemicals over decades are bad for our health

I started getting greys as a teenager (naturally a brunette, so quite noticeable), and like the OP, dyed my hair for years and years. Just before Covid, I'd had enough, my hair was always going brassy, and the condition wasn't great. My haridresser did a bit of a salt and pepper job on my hair, and at the time I wore it short anyway. I wasn't quite taken with it, and experimented with a colour depositing shampoo that my hairdresser recommneded me. I've not looked back! I've now got a lob, I'm completely silver, BUT once a week I use my colour depositing shampoo and am pinky/purple, which fades with each wash into a lovely soft lilac/pale pink. I get a lot fo compliments from young and old, and it's been brilliant for the condition of my hair, which is lovely and soft and shiny.

They do all colours, including natural colours, if you wanted to try for your brown?

https://www.justmylook.com/celeb-luxury-m402

I tried to go grey about 10 years ago, so committed to it then when I too became MOTB I got a grey put in to cover what was left of the brown

Got bored with grey, went blue, then purple and even red I think at one point till I got bored with all that and had it chemically stripped , which left it orange so had to be brunette again for a couple of years till two years ago I said sod it and let it grow out

Thats how it was last week, just had another cut to finally get rid of the orange which were looking like highlights come the end. Now Im full on silvery grey

Gorgeous!! 🤩

Oh that's interesting - lots of options on there, which range do you use?

I’ve embraced it - had no choice due to dye allergies. I’ve posted the same picture a few times (apologies to everyone who has seen it before). I initially got blonde babylights to blend the demarcation line and I wasn’t massively happy with it because it was too warm for my colouring, but I coped with it and it did help overall. I’ve said before, I think I’m lucky because my hair is soft, shiny and quite silver and I know it can be disheartening for people who maybe have dry or frizzy hair as can be the case when it goes grey. The only way you’ll find out though is to give it a go!

Oh and I get loads of compliments!

My hairdresser bleached my brown (dyed) hair platinum and toned it silver. Then grew it out. Was actually really easy. But it's short, which helped.

I agree with a PP - you would prob find a short style hides your baldy bits way better than a longer style

I forgot I'd started this thread!

Thanks for all your replies definitely some helpful tips, and those posting pics, your hair all looks fab!

@EmmaStone thanks for that link, I've had a look and I might give the colour wash shampoo a try when my roots have grown out a bit more.

@CaptainOliviaBenson re the bald patches. Please go to your doctor's about this. You should have blood tests. It's really not normal at your age

I have waist length hair and have finally grown out all of the dyed blond. I'm not thrilled with the colour which is light brown and white, but it is no longer like straw and feels fantastically silky and has got much thicker.
It used to cost me £150 a month to get it done and to be honest I just do not want to pay out that kind of money on my hair any more, and sitting in the hairdressers for hours on end is a real bore.

It’s the time element which puts me off. If i could click my fingers and my hair be done then I’d be more tempted.

But the hairdresser told me I was looking at a 5 hr appt when I enquired about starting to go lighter/blonder/highlights to hide the grey better than dark hair.

My hair was longish it takes a long time so my hairdresser did balayage type thing to to break it up. I still have some dark hair as well. I use the purple shampoo now.

I have to say that the thickness and condition of my hair has improved enormously since I stopped using chemicals on it.