Please help me - just look at my name!

[ILookPregnantButImNot]

I had my last child 3 yrs ago, but still have people assuming I am a little bit pregnant, or looking at me sideways trying to work it out. It is horrible, and really bad for my self esteem .

I just have a very awkward shape - I do have a belly, but it isn't that big (size 12/14). My waist is really high though and very short (remember Sonia in the 80's - that sort of shape) - add a belly to that and I do look a bit 'is she, isn't she?'.

So, what can I wear to help this!!! Low rise trousers just push my belly up, empire line tops look like I have something to hide . I am not overweight (well maybe 7lbs or so), do yoga and cycle already.

Please, please give me some advice before I have to get a T shirt made for me - this is belly not baby....

I have the same problem - totally embarrassing (although I sometimes get a seat on the tube off it ;-)

In my case it is because I am a bit overweight but also because i have TERRIBLE posture.

I find that if stand properly (ie pull in my bum and tum) it is much, much better. Would that work with you?

libido - thanks so much - I am not alone!!

Yes, posture does help a bit (hence the yoga), but even then, my shape and belly still look about 4 months (instead of 5-6) .

I have concluded I am just this shape and that is that. However, I do want to see if the right clothes can help me feel a bit better about it .

Change the yoga for pilates - it honestly makes a h-u-g-e difference.

Anchovey - I did pilates for 2 yrs after my last babe. Gave great inner core strength, but made no difference to my appearance - hence I change to yoga to see if that was any better! Obviously it is not . I am just weirdly built...

have you tried the bridget jones style pull everything in pants? you can get just briefs, shorts style for no vpl or the full boob to knee job so no buldges escape. after my ds i just could not stop my tummy hanging over top of pants despite doing all the stomach excercises but these worked!

Can you forget the trousers, which IMO do nothing but create a 'muffin top' and opt for skirts instead? Skirts can be worn with a much higher and thicker waistband, which holds your belly in, and a tighter, low cut top with a cardigan over detracts from the belly and focuses on the breasts. Skirts also make your bum look smaller.

Skirt length is a tricky one, it all depends on your legs. If your thighs are decent, then opt for above the knee. If you have chunkier thighs, then knee length, and if you have generally larger legs, then 3/4 length is good. Full length for special occassion only!

HTH

Blondie - I have some of those , just can't wear them all day every day - special occasions only i'm afraid.

DSM - skirts might work, but it will always be a theoretical - I am just not a skirt person. I have never met anyone who is less of a skirt person than me .

Ta for your ideas though. I fear there is no solution. I shall just have to wait till I am obviously menopausal for the looks to stop .

have another baby.... it'll be a good excuse for a year or so

seriously though, i'm not overweight at all and have this problem, it's getting very annoying. i solved it when i was a teen by doing alot of pushups every day for a few months and it lasted til i had dd. can't resort to that now as my back is really bad but might be an idea for you?

I'm in the same position despite 5 years since DC4. TBH I had a bit of a pot belly before kids. People have asked twice) when the baby's due and I've wanted to curl up and die. Like you I'm not overweight and I exercise a lot.

I agree that posture counts for a lot - when I stand up straight I look a hell of a lot better. I also swear by the all-in-one body undergarment things (M&S have a good range - old lady section of underwear) - I wear them most of the time and feel a lot more confident. They seem to pull the flab up to my bust.

Oh, lovely - more replies - I am not alone . I have had comments three times in the last year assuming I am pg (one by a bloody doctor as well ). It makes me feel crap I have to say.

Another pg - erm, not really addressing the issue is it !

So, posture seems to be a good thing. Any ideas to pracice good posture more?

Any more ideas about clothes!!! Other than a sack?

Dirtysexymummy - you sound like Trinny and Susannah!

Did you have diastatis. Separation of the stomach muscles? I had that. I had to do loads of boring exercises. My stomach has been flatter that it is now though... so i can't even blame the prgs!

MC - no I didn't get that separation thing. I did wonder, but did the lying down test myself and got it checked by a chiro and it was fine. I actually have very strong muscles in my stomach, just a 4-5 month pg gut sitting on top . It is this coupled with my odd high-waisted shape that is the problem. I reckon if my waist were longer and lower it wouldn't notice half as much...
Ta for your though though

.... that diastatis thing might be whats wrong with me though.

i know i tore stomach muscles when i was preg with ds. went into hospital because i was in agony and was told by a doctor 'nothing to worry about, you've just torn some muscles. come back in if you have any pain'.... sorta why i'm hare doc, thanks for the concern!!!

you could always petition dh for some liposuction..... 'but i need it sweetie'