Fabulous outfit for a BBQ??

[BetterLuckTomorrow]

I’m looking for an outfit, probably a midi dress, that I can wear to a bbq and feel, if not a million dollars, then just really confident in. I’m dreading going due to one of the other guests, who I’ve not seen in a long time and have a difficult relationship with, so I really want to look my best!

I’m five foot seven, size 12. I’ve got large boobs and still a fairly hourglass shape (less so these days after two children!). My arms aren’t particularly toned, I’ve got fairly large thighs and cankles. My calves aren’t too bad. No I’ve got pale skin and mid brown hair. I don’t feel comfortable wearing anything particularly low cut.

I don’t have any sense of style whatsoever and don’t really know where to begin. I buy most clothes from H&M, M&S, with the odd item from Hush thrown in. I’d like a dress under £150 if possible but could spend more if needed. It’s for a BBQ but other attendees are likely to be dressed smartly so I’d rather be over dressed than under dressed. They all spend a lot on clothes and are very well groomed.

I would be so grateful for any suggestions, I don’t know where to begin!

I'm going to go a little bit against the grain here, you don't mention your age but to me lots of these dresses are quite ageing.
I would refocus the budget, spend a bit on getting your hair blown, brows done, nails and pedicure done. And then with your figure I'd go for a wrap midi dress with a sleeve that lands somewhere around your mid upper arm. I'd personally try to avoid floral unless fairly subtle. The polka dot dress above makes me think of the zara dress that was everywhere a few years ago so I wouldn't go there either.

If you go to a store like JL or a nice brand (think mid tier / higher end high street) they will love a brief like this - it’s what sales advisors are paid to do! (I worked in retail a long time, we loved finding an outfit that made the customer look and feel fab). Especially if you go on a quieter day, avoid peak times like Saturday afternoons. Phase Eight seem to have had a bit of a revival online lately, otherwise Anthropologie, French Connection, Jigsaw etc

I always veer towards simple and elegant for occasions like this (less is more) instead of anything too loud. A really flattering shirt dress with a belt (blue, black or white) lovely sandals or castañer wedges and gold jewellery (Anthropologie have great gold plated earrings etc in at the moment that look classic and expensive). Alternatively a well cut black maxi with tan accessories, gold jewellery & a decent pair of sunglasses.

If it’s not too dressy, look for the best and most flattering pair of off white jeans you can afford, a black silk tshirt or a blue shirt & classic accessories.

I love the colour of this dress:
https://www.newlook.com/uk/womens/clothing/dresses/bright-blue-cotton-broderie-hem-midi-dress/p/885366143

Zara has some nice shirt dresses on at the moment.

https://www.zara.com/uk/en/woman-dresses-shirt-l1091.html

Not sure about the advice to wear gold. It doesn't suit everyone. I think silver suits some people better.

I was looking at them thinking the same thing. These are all plain, safe, unfashionable dresses. How old are you op?

Loving some of these dresses.
Just flagging the shoes on/off thread from elsewhere and make sure you think about shoes you can stand all day in on grass or if you have to move in doors you feel comfortable not wearing shoes with if the host asks you to take them off.

I'd scroll through the Outnet to check out some brands you might like
Iris and Ink would like great with a cropped cream denim jacket
Over budget but easy to wear
Also look at Ganni, Maje on there

But maybe also think of getting a skirt with plainer top. Skirt and top can help you find something that works with on top with larger boobs and upper arms but allows you to define your waist. Like this blue midi or red mid/maxi

They've not got much in the way of bbq outfits yet but I got an amazing midi dress (short sleeves, plunging neckline, slight split up front/side black and floral coloured) from Oliver Bonas last autumn/summer and it was in their sale. Sosander also have some nice dresses too which are on the glam side:

[[https://www.sosandar.com/clothing/dresses/?style=Midi+Dress

[[https://www.oliverbonas.com/fashion/dresses/midi-dresses

Why go for a dress - these are all so "mumsy" - your title said you wanted "fabulous". You are tall, and have a great figure - huge slouchy trousers, or a jumpsuit would be more fashion-forward. There are some great ones on Nobody's Child site, like this. It would look great with some cleavage, and I know you said your arms aren't toned, but with a fake tan and a statement necklace (for example), it's going to look great.

I'm guessing OP is likely to be in her 30s/40s.

To me - it doesn't matter what she wears so much as long as the style, colour, suit her.

There's a boutique I go to locally when I want a dress for a bbq/summer party which is colourful, but statement like. It does those Greek key dresses that you can pay much more for and also long floaty dresses in all sorts of colours and patterns, Italian imports mostly I think.

You then just accessorize with the right amount of bling and/or accessories and you're done. Most women I know wear this sort of thing out out. This shop makes a killing so she knows what she's doing! The Ted Baker/Coast type dress look is very overdone and passe now. This website has a few wow factor dresses too:

[[https://www.no-angel.co.uk/product-category/shop-all/dresses/

I think OP should really get herself to a personal stylist at John Lewis or somewhere like that and preferably go with a friend or relative to help her.

It's all very well us saying, this dress will look great or this jumpsuit/slouchy trousers, but she really needs to try things on in person, is my viewpoint and then find a wow colour/print/style that works for her, whether that be trousers/jumpsuit or midi dress (or other length).

OP - could you speak to the friendliest of one of the guests and ask her what she's wearing, maybe even she'd help you?

I used to have a best friend who was an East London girl but quite glam and loved to dress up. I had my own style but she liked to turn me into a Ted Baker/Coast dress, fake tan, fake nails, Botox type and she'd help me and give me advice which I took and I did do that look for a while. It was hilarious because she loved high heels, but one evening we were drunk, coming back in a taxi from a club and both of us took off our crippling high heels and walked the short bit from the taxi to her house in bare/stockinged feet laughing and crying at the pain we endured with heels!

I still ended up going my own way, with my own style, which was nicer dresses but not along her lines and which would've looked silly on me!

I don't think there's anything "wow" about that. Because of the budget I suggested Pink City Prints.

If the budget were higher I'd have suggested Klements or Alémais or Egg. Or possibly Ganni, Baum und Pferdgarten or Stein Goya.

I suppose I'm not intimidated by or particularly impressed by (or tbh even notice) the sort of immaculately groomed look which needs botoxe, blow dries, "simple gold jewellery" nails etc so if it me I'd pick something non high street that it's very unlikely anyone else will have and none of the grooming.

Would you consider renting a dress if you want something amazing just for the day? Maybe something like this and then spend the rest of your budget on a manicure/hair styles?

Lovely dress but I think too sack like for an hourglass, it may hang off the boobs and make an hourglass look like they dont have a waist

Where’s her arm gone in the second picture??

Oh my goodness, thank you SO much to all of you who have posted suggestions, I really appreciate it.

Sorry, I should have said that I am 38. I’m not too bothered about looking ‘mumsy’ I don’t think. I am a mum, I don’t really mind looking like a stereotypical mum. I dress more for practicality and comfort these days than anything else.

Style really isn’t a strong point for me, I see people and think they look great but don’t seem to have the skill to pick out exactly what about their look works so well and be able to replicate it. I am so envious of people who naturally have an eye for what looks good, I most certainly don’t and just don’t feel as though I have the energy at the moment to put lots of effort into working out what would look good on me so I half heatedly follow a couple of middle aged Instagram influencer types and that’s about it.

Yes, I’ve asked for ‘fabulous’ and I don’t have a good idea what that looks like for me. I’ve never worn a jumpsuit before. Am I a jumpsuit person? Off to have another look at more recent suggestions on the thread over a coffee. THANK YOU for all of the food for thought!

I have the Somerset maxi dress from Anthropologie linked to above and I think it’s perfect. The prints are great, it suits a curvy figure, it’s lovely, good quality cotton. Worn with flat glitzy sandals and nice jewellery, it’s perfect. Not at all mumsy. I get lots of compliments

How about Aspiga?
Nice summery vibe

I'm a little bit older than you OP but same height, dress size with larger chest and hourglass.
Majority of the dresses suggested would make me look much bigger than I am.
Whilst I don't go for low cut, high necklines don't do me any favours and some of these suggestions would make me look very matrony.
I bought a fab midi dress a few years ago from Bravissimo. Our local store closed down but sure you can order online
Fit perfectly and really did a lot for my shape
I feel very comfortable and confident wearing it

Am I a jumpsuit person?

If you're an hourglass, probably not. A dress that shows your waist is essential.

In fact, you're probably best off looking at a retro/vintage sort of place. They will have plenty of dresses that fit over the waist and bust and flare out at the skirt (although the pencil skirt/dress is often the way forward for hourglasses). Or some palazzo trousers with a cinched in wrap top or long sleeve Bardot top.

Unfortunately, when your waist is a lot smaller than the rest of you, it's very easy to lose it if something is loose, frothy or too flowy and just make yourself look big and shapeless. That waist needs to be seen; it's the first rule for an hourglass.

https://mintvelvet.com/products/lilac-floral-pleat-mini-dress
I’m similar shape to you and bought this from Mint Velvet. They have some other beautiful dresses. They have in-store personal shopping, you can make an appointment

No offence but I think this is a little reductive. The waist doesn’t have to always be seen as an hourglass! I’m an hourglass and although I have some clothes that cinch in at the waist , I also have some lovely floaty/flowy dresses that don’t. Not everything has to be about showing off curves. Plus the whole retro style is a bit of a cliche now I think.

But if you are having larger bust then loose fitted clothes around your waist just add to the volume and you look two sizes bigger- I know this from own experience.

I’m probably a slimmer hourglass. I have 2 jumpsuits and one I love, palm tree print, the other black rarely worn it. I did have a loud pastel Aztec print one which wasn’t really me either but was nice in summer.

Don’t forget that lots of dresses including the wide Greek key type need a belt to show off your waist or not if you have no waist or have a small one, eg hourglass.

Belts have been my new best friend in recent years.