I'm early 30s, two DCs 9 and 6. I gained weight before I had them and have only lost some of it, but kept all my insecurity and self consciousness. I'm finally moving forward in that regard but have barely any clothes I feel comfortable in. Literally 2 tops, 2 pairs of jeans, a couple of hoodies. I find it so difficult to find things I like, I'd like to find an influencer type person with ideas but rarely see anyone with a style I like. As a teenager I was pretty emo, wore huge flared cords with tiny tshirts.
Please help me with some inspiration: I still quite like an alternative look, kind of rock/indie/grunge I guess but not super out there, more subtle, whereas 'alternative' fashion often seems to be full alternative or nothing if that makes sense? I need to build a wardrobe rather than outfits I guess. I favour black clothes, maybe some khaki/olive/burnt sienna/brown. I have dark-ish ash blonde hair, blue/green eyes, tan easily - so imo light colours make me look washed out.
A big problem is I am overweight, about a size 16, sometimes 14. Almost everything at the moment seems to be tucked in/short tops and I have a real pronounced pouch that I'm self conscious of, partly from being bigger in the past and partly post c-section. This seems to have just made a big block for me in buying clothes, I discount almost everything when I know reality is nothing will hide it and I need to accept it really. I'm 5'8", quite big boobs, slim legs, still have a waist and a bit of definition but obviously soft given my size.
At the moment I wear skinny jeans and doc marten Serena or Chelsea boots. I like the though of bootcut or flared jeans but not sure what shoes I'd wear with them. I also tend to wear looser tops which feels OK with skinny jeans as somewhat balanced, I don't know what to wear with looser jeans. I quite like tapered leg trousers, structured jackets/blazers. I'd love to wear a leather jacket but I always look like a huge square shouldered top heavy boob monster in them. Trench coats are a secret thing I'd like but again don't know where to start. Feel like black would be too gothy for me, is khaki weird? Camel maybe too pale.
I'd love outfit inspiration, online shops I may not have heard of... Anything to get some vibe and sense of myself back. I'm so tired of feeling frumpy and embarrassed wearing the same things on repeat.