Tween curly hair advice please

[Gunnersforthecup]

We have just had a haircare mishap, in which a hair stylist cut off my tween's bun (she had waist length hair previously, but she wanted to brush it herself, and got into tangling problems. We had come in for help with detangling).

Her hair looks okay at the front but the back has been a bit hacked around; I asked for it not to be further "restyled" for various reasons eg it's helpful to be able to tie it back for school.

I am wondering whether we just let it grow out and steer clear of hairdressers altogether, or whether we should find a curly hair specialist somewhere along the south coast?

How on earth do you manage to allow a hairdresser to cut off a full bun?

He was snipping a little bit, I thought at the side, then he pulled at the bun and said "Can I just cut this off now"? He had already cut away 70-80% and it was just hanging on by a small amount of hair, there was not much to be done at that point other than just cut it off. I agree that he should have been asking little step by little step. I had thought from what had gone before that this was going to be the plan.

I felt at the time that I couldn't get angry about it in the salon because it would make it worse for my daughter.

I had put a lot of argan oil on as I was trying to detangle it at home as well. The hair stylist said that he had thought she had a problem with her scalp because her bun was all moist. It was moist because of the argan oil. There is nothing at all wrong with her scalp.

To be fair, I had thought she might have to lose some of her hair because of the tangles, but I wasn't expecting the stylist to decide basicallyto hack most of her bun off, off his own bat.

I couldn't see much hair falling to the floor, so I thought he hadn't taken very much off at all - until he pulled at her hair and most of the bun came away.

I have very curly hair and my mum had no idea how to manage. For future reference Conditioner is your friend its far better at detangling then oils. Wet the hair and then put in massive fistfulls into the hair then brush the tangles out from the bottom up. By this I mean start the brush on the bottom inch of the hair then slowly move up rather then trying to put the brush in the top of the hair.

In terms of the now hair cut I would make sure it's even but wouldn't need to be styled. So by even make sure the front and backs are in a straight line. I won't go to hairdressers for the reason you describe but my friend is a hairdresser and insists they are getting better in terms if learning how to deal with very curly hair. So find someone who specialises in curly hair to adress the current issue if your not comfortable cutting it straight yourself.

Going forward, I’d go to a curly hair specialist.

I have very curly hair and my experience with most hairdressers has been that they don’t have a clue what they’re doing.Most people have straight or wavy hair and that’s what their training base is.

I’ve had very positive experiences with the one curly hair specialist I’ve used and they “understand” my hair.
Most of the time, though, I cut my own because I can get away with any uneven cuts and it saves time ( and money).

If you're near Brighton there are a few places that have curly specialists. The cuttlefish salons are great.

As @Caffeineneedednow says, conditioner is your friend.
I rarely use shampoo but do a cowash
( conditioner wash).
I use a small round plastic contraption (detangler… I wouldn’t go so far as to call it a brush) and work from end of strands up towards scalp)
I never brush between washes. A quick tweak with fingers is enough.

I had tried brushing and combing through with conditioner, but it hadn't worked on this occasion (we have quite a variety here).

Argan oil and spray is usually very good though.

Her hair is not even now; it will take time to grow to the point where we can get it even. We are keeping it clipped back for school for the time being. The front isn't too bad.

She is very pretty so that always helps.

I went out on Sunday and bought loads of clips, slides, barrettes etc. I am trying to persuade her to try on some cute beanies, I think that could look good with some curls poking from underneath.

I cut my own too
its very forgiving!
as @Caffeineneedednow says, only ever comb through when it’s wet, lots of conditioner, and a big wide tooth comb.

hair masks are good, especially the garnier one which you can also use as a leave in conditioner.

never brush or comb when dry.

could your DD get some hair wraps or Alice bands for now to manage the re growth stage? I like the ones that are actually rigid Alice bands but look like a hair tie - not sure that makes sense…

You’ll probably find that even though you think her hair is a mess, she’ll get loads of compliments about it now!🤣

We have the Garnier Hair Food, it is lovely.

We have some "knot hair bands", I'm not sure whether she would want to wear them for school though.

There are, unfortunately, bits that are sticking up at the back that we are trying to clip down.

I am wondering whether to say anything to the owners of the salon. It was so stunningly what what we had wanted. But I am not sure what we would achieve - it won't make her hair better, poor darling.

The good thing is that she can't really see the back, and it doesn't look too different from the front.

I've got curly hair as have most of my family.
When you say "bun" do you mean that she had it tied with a hair tie in a bun, or do you mean the hair had a massive "nest" at the back which couldn't be detangled?

I mean that it had been put up into a bun and then was proving very difficult to detangle. It was however coming out slowly, but it was a lot of work. That was why we had gone to get help.

Curly hair lady here !! Conditioner combed through with a wide tooth comb after washing is your friend. Then a spray bottle with a water and conditioner mix to detangle each day. I'd defo go for a curly specialist hairdresser 🙂