The Items that Got Away

[bluepirate]

I waver between sensible and impulse buying, sometimes depending on the time of day, and whether I'm in the vicinity of a glass of wine. I recently dropped £250 on a totally impractical pair of boots at 11pm on a Friday because it's just too easy to access Vinted from my phone when I'm in a devil-may-care mood. It was daft and I've only worn them once, but I'm not sorry.

But in the past I've also hesitated, and lost the item forever. Sometimes I've left it in the digital basket and come back to find it forever out of stock. Sometimes I've saved a picture, and now I forlornly image-search to find traces of the fashion prize I wanted.

I'm thinking of things that I couldn't justify spending that much on, at the time, but which I've never forgotten. I still look for them now, but in some cases I don't even know what to type in as a description: I just have the vague memory in my head, and wish I'd been rash and bought it at the time, because it's been on my mind ever since.

Am I alone or do you still mourn the things you never bought? I have a little list, myself - how about you?

God, yes - loads of things.

But quite often when I have hesitated over something I realise months later that I probably wouldn’t have had much opportunity to wear it anyway. (White leather dresses seem to be a recurring theme.) Certainly, since Covid I have less inclination to leave the house without good reason, so even the clothes I have are hanging unworn for long periods.

However, I get better and better at discerning exactly what will be of lasting value to me - trying to ensure I’ll have a decent wardrobe if I make it to old age - so it’s not hard to justify buying something unfeasibly lovely if I can.

Thanks for replying! It's a balance isn't it... I sometimes think I wish I had the thing just for the sake of HAVING it, so I could enjoy the real thing in my wardrobe rather than just looking at my little screengrab. If I wore it once, to a memorable occasion, and had a nice photo of me in it, that would seem worth it (I tell myself). Hanging unworn doesn't seem a total waste to me, if I got one good use from it: it would be associated with that single great outing.

It's also a case of having a bit more money than I did when I first saw these items and thinking with hindsight that I should have just gone for it.

I think all my mistake purchases have just been the wrong size (depop, Vinted, ebay) rather than huge style errors.

Very interesting to hear that yours are white leather dresses! Mine aren't

I have a very lengthy list dating back to my early teenage years… it includes things I once had but lost; a yellow silk shirt that an old flatmate persuaded me to part with, another I lent to someone who never returned it. A dress that I sold to pay my gas bill. Then there are the scalloped shoes in pearlised leather from 1980, a Jasper Conran coat at a designer sale that was the best coat I have ever tried on but a bit too much of a stretch financially as it was totally impractical, things I stupidly dithered over on EBay.
DH points out, sensibly, that I can’t buy all the things I see and love, not being a multi millionaire, but still there are things that tug at my heartstrings decades later.
I am obsessed with clothes to an unnatural degree though !

The things I mourn are things I actually bought, and lost or ruined. There was an amazing big jumper from Boule (does it still exist?) 30 years ago, which was wool, thick, warm, and never bobbled. Fucked by candle wax, by one of the teens.

There was a cashmere long cardigan (mid thigh) in silver grey, which I wore till it was holey.

And a red dress I made for myself out of silk whilst at uni, 1920s style, which most definitely wouldn't fit me now, anyway! (Size 8) .

Ps the Boule jumper cost a fortune, but did not bobble! Young people, don't be fooled by modern knitwear manufacturers and their retailers that this doesn't happen. It usually did, in the past, because the quality was so superior.

A pair of flat (inch or so) heeled tortoiseshell Fendi sandals circa 1998. I worked at a nice shopping mall in Essex and there was a fab shoe shop which sold a lot of designer and bouji brand shoes.
I used to go in and try them on every week and kept thinking of buying them but never did. They were expensive of course but they were gorgeous.
I really wish I had 😭😭😭😭 I’ve regretted it forever.

I hope I'm not spoiling the thread by confessing that I'm a fella. My interest in this discussion is purely fashion, nothing weird! To make up for it, here are some of my lost treasures - I found them saved from years ago in an old picture folder.

You might well think I am better off without them, which would probably be quite helpful for me. Still wish I'd bought that embroidered patchwork McQueen skull t-shirt even though it was a couple of hundred in the shop. The Paul Smith pink wedge is not very practical but I loved it when I saw the pic again just now. And the oily brown Westwood (I think) poncho with the orange boots still appeals to me.

I've image searched and this was Paul Smith 2014! that's how long I've been pining for it.

Those are all rather fine choices, @bluepirate - though the Westwood might have been difficult to fit into day to day life. The t shirt is gorgeous.

I have one or two young adult nephews (as beautiful as the young always are) who take no particular interest in clothes. So I’ve started obsessing over their wardrobes as much as mine.

That skull tshirt would get worn by me at least weekly.

Thank you @RandomersAssociation I feel validated!

There's one more item at least on my list, but I don't seem to have saved a pic of it.

It was a Paul Smith suit jacket, pin-striped except that the stripes quirkily become hand-drawn, wobbly lines towards the bottom. I don't even know how to describe it for Google to find it for me.

The skull t-shirt can be found in scattered pics online but I haven't seen it available to buy. To be honest I am tempted to ask a seamstress near me to just knock up a copy. She did a fantastic job duplicating these patchwork jeans, also Paul Smith, and also vanished by the time I decided I wanted them.

Close up of that excellent skull t-shirt

I have a friend who bought a Vivienne Westwood jacket from the original Kings Rd shop in the 70s, then didn't have the nerve to wear it and sold it for £20. Whenever I'm plagued by regrets, I think of him and feel better.

You need to ask MN to edit the title of this thread, OP, and put a trigger warning.

I'd happily forgotten about the Gucci jumpsuit that I hesitated too long on and lost - retailed at about £3K, on Vinted for £250.

Then you and your thread came along. Thanks.

@bluepirate you have now derailed my morning to scroll Vinted 😁

Sorry everyone 😁I'm an enabler it seems.

MANY green sequinned dresses
A brand new with tags cashmere cardigan on vinted recently

A black high neck bold floral dress from Next in 2016 - I was holding out for one that had the pattern repeat matched better than the one I tried on.

(Do we also count the faux fur jacket and brocade dress I failed to collect from the dry cleaners before it closed down?)

One of the Alexander McQueen Damien Hirst collab scarves. I was on mat. leave at the time and couldn't justify the £500-ish. They now go for lots more on Ebay (and maybe Vinted).

A Viv Westwood dress with the classic pre-Raphaelite art on it. She did a range not long before she passed and I dithered over a dress that was nearly a grand - it sold out in my size and I've thought of it ever since. Nothing has come up on Vinted or Ebay yet.

About 15-20 years ago, a pair of knee-high leather Mulberry boots (do they even do footwear any more?) I couldn't justify the price at the time but I'd still be wearing them today.

Let’s not go down the dry cleaner route, @Whataretheodds - that way madness …

I did buy some Mulberry wellies about 12 /15 years ago, @Anothernewname123 - one of my best buys ever. Fitted beautifully, and made of such strangely perfect rubber that everyone mistook them for leather. They took me from beach to theatre in the same day many times.

I like all your ones, OP. Especially the suit and the t-shirt.

Mine are almost all lamenting the things that no longer fit. When I was thin I cared a lot more about being thin (thanks 90s / 00s cultural influence) so bought everything in the smallest possible size I could possibly wedge myself into. I don't actually want to be that size again, I'm quite happy with current muscles and curves but I wish I had the automatic right to the same clothes, sized up.

I struggle to let go of some items, as if owning the smaller size might somehow open up a portal to finding the bigger one, one day.

A necklace I’ve been coveting for years. It’s solid gold so the price fluctuates (always up!). 4 years ago it was around £300 less than it is now. Should have bought it then but talked myself out of it. It’s now too expensive for me to buy.

Thanks everyone. Long-time reader, first-time poster, and I appreciate you all being welcoming!

If anyone has any pics of long-lost items, bonus (interesting to me anyway)

My main regret is the Draw-In Light devore mermaid dress - velvety and gorgeous with shells over the boobs which makes it sound tacky but it really wasn't! Only £200 but I was absolutely skint at the time and couldn't scrounge up enough cash. They were such a small company that's it's very unlikely I'll ever find one on vinted.

There was a gorgeous oversized cardigan from MaxMara that I never bought and always regretted, but I managed to find it on Vestiaire - that was a happy day! Still wear it all the time.

There are a couple of things I really regret getting rid of, too - a vintage Fendi shoulder bag, thick knit Joseph jumper and the most perfect, soft vintage army shirt/jacket. It was when I was going through a kondo phase 😭

I absolutely subscribe to the portal sizing-up possibility!

I have been guilty of buying the Lovely Things in two sizes to avoid this dilemma. If I particularly love something I will see it as my duty to round them all up, and will scour Vinted until I own four of them so that I will never be without. Thankfully my tastes don't run to expensive designer so I can do this without bankrupting myself. The storage space, however, is an issue...

This item wasn't expensive but I just wish I could have bought another pair when they were in stock.
They were pewter platform high heel shoes from Dorothy Perkins from about 10 years ago (I think). I was out one night and I ended up breaking the heel off one of the shoes (it might have been possible to recover them from such an accident where the heel was hanging off the shoe) but I was so frustrated I chucked them in the bin and bin collection day was the day after!

I liked them because they were sparkly but not silver and not black, more like a dark charcoal colour so went with so many outfits I had at the time. Did I mention that they were comfortable too?

I really miss those shoes now.