Sort myself out November - help needed

[Weighttlosshelp]

I’m in a massive rut. Overweight yes but also such a frump.

hair in ugly bun every day, where shapeless leggings that have gone baggy.

please help me to help myself. Not depressed just in a funk, an ugly funk.

what can I do to come out in. December looking and feeling better.

*wear shapeless leggings!

Following as a bit similar. Old worn out jeans rather than leggings though.

No he'll, but I want to join you! Pretty much the same here, I'm frumpy because clothes don't look good on me at the moment anyway. Need to loose a couple stone and get back to looking half decent with clothes etc x

Let’s do this together!

Am looking at my gnarly feet thinking I could start there!

I'm in a rut too! I've had the uniform of over sized tshirt/jeans for years. Which I don't mind honestly but I remind myself of a cartoon character wearing the same thing everyday 🙈

I hate my hair atm it's annoyingly fine and super straight. If I put a beanie on for two seconds it'll be a matted mess! So I tend to french twist it out of the way.

Feeling overly stressed and skins terrible as well. Have been comfort snacking like crazy, buying ready meals and frozen pizza as I've not wanted to cook for myself even though I prep things for dc (on a blended diet).

My plan is to start off trying to drink enough water each day and to work out a meal plan/batch cook that isn’t just sugar and cheesey pasta 🙈 When I was a teenager my Grandma taught me to set my hair and I'm toying with doing this each week like she used to. But I'll start with the water 😅

Haircut.

Perfume.

Fabulous piece of jewellery or unfeasibly extravagant accessory - beanie, belt, boots, whatever. Something completely outside and beyond your usual budget but that isn’t weight dependent.

Then buy one simple plain garment to show off the accessory.

Then you’ll feel better.

@Weighttlosshelp just thinking with you saying you feel a frump - do you want to change your style completely or just smarten it up so you feel more put together?

Swapping leggings for maybe a relaxed tailored trouser? The kind that look smart but are super comfy still? Or are you thinking something more radical?

Could definitely start on my feet too 🤣 my greys have been asking for a dye for months now too 🙈 I tried shopping the other day but nothing looks good with a fat belly (and small boobs) but ended up with a nice cardigan which is a change from my usual hoodie 🫣 been good today so hopefully a few pounds off to begin with will at least make me feel better in clothes

There’s something missing for me I think. I need to lose a lot of weight but there are other people similar size who don’t look frumpy like I do. Is it confidence or something else? Not sure where to start but I want to look good for Christmas party at work or at least look put together and comfortable in myself.

original littered with typos edited to correct

1 Decent haircut.

2 leggings or trousers that fit
3 clean comfortable trainers / shoes
4 nice blouse and jumper now it’s cold
remember, you are worth nice hair and nice clothes

No doubt the OP is away following my advice to the letter …

(And setting fire to any leggings in her possession.)

@ColdinNovember have you looked at things like kibbe body type? I'm trying to work that out for myself atm

@Squirre just finished, I came out romantic. I think that’s part of it I prefer the look of loose oversized drapey type of clothes, but probably more structured outfits would be more suited to my body shape. I just feel so ‘big’ not just in weight, feet, arms, legs. Dressing in more fitted items is quite scarey.

work is pretty smart causal. If I’m not seeing anybody can be smart jeans/chino with a jumper or top and a slight smarter (probably should be smarter really) version if I have meetings. Tailored trousers for example. I hardly ever wear dresses feel like I look like a man in a dress sometimes despite the massive bust.

sorry OP for me-railing your thread

@PerditaProvokesEnmity
That is excellent advice - I am totally focusing on hair, skin, jewellery, shoes right now. I am
making a start on losing weight, but in the meantime I want to look like I care about myself and also actually take care of myself!

I think skincare is a huge boost - my face looks better than it has in years, even if my chin is apparently MIA!

@ColdinNovember There's some really good accounts on TikTok that suggest clothes for each type that "feel" like the style you prefer. I don't think it was cheap but a woman I work with had a consult with a stylist she saw on some TV show. It was virtual, she uploaded pictures of her clothes and herself and the stylist put them together in outfit suggestions to better suit her style/body with some suggestions for new pieces. I can't remember the name but I can find out. She was really good, the focus wasn't on shopping but confidence and making the most of what you have.

Do people not just take the time to try on their own clothes nowadays? Unless they’re paying someone on TikTok?

@PerditaProvokesEnmity I don't judge people who pay for advice (tiktok is free though). I think when you're body changes and your in a rut it can be hard to "see yourself" and it's not always easy to find clothes that fit well that are affordable. A neutral persons eye can be helpful for lots of things so why not clothes?

Oh, I have nothing against getting advice! But often, here, people will say I’ve bought this new thing and don’t know how to wear it - without having taken the seemingly obvious step of trying it on with all their own clothes first.

For those suggesting jewellery, do you have any brand suggestions?

@psuedocream3 I suppose it depends on budget and style but Missoma have some lovely pieces. They have a fine range as well as costume. My bf got her wedding necklace from them and it looked stunning!

Thank you, I had looked at Monica Vinander and Astrid and Miyu but they haven't quite got what I'm looking for. I'm looking for stacked necklaces in sterling silver/white gold and more delicate chains rather than chunky - Missoma has some nice options, I can see why your friend chose from there.