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Original poster

Would you/ did you buy a second hand wedding ring?

60 replies

MonChoufleur123 · 09/10/2023 19:18

We got married during Covid - tried to rearrange the reception 3 times and ended up just having ourselves and witnesses at the registry office, no celebration allowed. At the time I used my grandmother's ring which has huge sentimental value. We said after the pandemic we'd get 'proper' rings - then the cost of living crisis hit! Most of our savings for the wedding are long gone. I've seen an eternity ring I really really love on Vinted. It's higher spec than I'd be able to afford new, so unusual looking but really 'me'. Would you buy it - or wait a few more years to try to build up savings to buy something new? Have you bought a second hand ring? I feel weird about a ring possibly being taken off someone's hand after they pass away and sold. Am probably overthinking this but it's such an important, symbolic purchase.TIA!

OP posts:
Its5656 · 09/10/2023 19:25

Yes me, I got my wedding ring from a second hand jewellery shop. Not sure where DH got the engagement ring from but I love it.
We had a covid wedding (not full lockdown but restricted) we used what we would have spent on a bigger wedding on a nicer honeymoon.. travelled around Greece. Don't regret a thing.

CharlotteStreetW1 · 09/10/2023 19:31

My engagement ring is Victorian and is perfect for me. My wedding ring was my mother's - she had died not long before the wedding.

So second hand or literally "pre-loved" is fine by me.

(Apart from Kate having Diana's ring when it was from such a publicly unhappy marriage and it's a monstrosity)

afaloren · 09/10/2023 19:33

Yes, I got mine in the Jewellery Quarter. It was the only wedding ring I really loved. It’s Victorian.

Jesusmaryjosephandtheweedon · 09/10/2023 19:35

If you really love it and it's very "you" then go for it! It's not about other people it's about you, you have to look at it for the next 50 years!

MrsDanversChickenSandwich · 09/10/2023 19:35

I've always liked antique posy rings. One with a sentimental inscription rather than a religious one though.

ChilliPixie · 09/10/2023 19:39

Yes me! We were really poor when we got married, I pawned some old jewellery and bought my wedding ring from a second hand jewellers

Would you/ did you buy a second hand wedding ring?
Torganer · 09/10/2023 19:41

I would say it’s quite common to have a vintage ring. Mine is so old the diamond was cut by hand, I love the look of it. The diamond has probably been reset many times (my setting is from 1920, diamond is a lot older) and I love the thought of that. I wanted a plain gold band and bought that second hand too, I got them to slim it down slightly so it matched the thickness of the engagement band. Hatton Garden has some lovely shops for this and they come with full authentication.

Wineocloc · 09/10/2023 19:43

I’m considering getting a vintage diamond ring as I like the old cut diamonds but when you mention rings getting cut off dead peoples fingers that does put me off a bit!! They are beautiful though and nice to keep, and will always be valuable

henrysugar12 · 09/10/2023 19:46

I was given a wedding ring of a relative, and had it valued as I thought it didn't look like the 9ct gold it was supposed to be. It was 22ct gold and from 1800. The relative that brought it, brought it as a new ring back in the 1970's when it was actually 175 years old!

PeacockingAbout · 09/10/2023 19:51

If I'd found what I wanted 2nd hand I'd have definitely gone for 2nd hand. You get more for your money, you're not supporting current diamond or gold mining which can be rather problematic (it was in the olden days too of course but its already out of the ground now) and you can get some lovely unique styles. If you've found something you like - go for it. The important symbolism is in your relationship and what you're creating together not in the ring's past.

tinselvestsparklepants · 09/10/2023 20:13

I've got a second hand engagement ring and a wedding ring my dad found in the garage! I love them. They are perfect for me, environmentally responsible and didn't cost £££££ so I can wear them every day without worry.

C1N1C · 09/10/2023 20:18

I think I spent a grand total of about £200 on my partner's wedding ring. Anyone who pushes for more (male or female), especially 3 x monthly salary is an absolute gold digger. It's meant to be a symbol of love, not a symbol of extravagance or 'proof' you're serious (that's what the wedding is for!).

I applaud you if you buy/use second hand :)

poetryandwine · 09/10/2023 20:19

PeacockingAbout · 09/10/2023 19:51

If I'd found what I wanted 2nd hand I'd have definitely gone for 2nd hand. You get more for your money, you're not supporting current diamond or gold mining which can be rather problematic (it was in the olden days too of course but its already out of the ground now) and you can get some lovely unique styles. If you've found something you like - go for it. The important symbolism is in your relationship and what you're creating together not in the ring's past.

This. My MIL had a lovely antique wedding set, bought from a pawn shop, that now belongs to her eldest granddaughter. Both couples married as students so it is romantic and fitting.

Mouthfulofquiz · 09/10/2023 20:20

Without a doubt I would (and do) wear second hand jewellery. If you love it, go for it!

mrsmingleton · 09/10/2023 20:24

Are you planning on not using your Grandmothers ring now?
TBH I don't think I would be buying a ring from Vinted though unless you are sure about it's credentials.

Redlarge · 09/10/2023 20:29

Yes,got a lot better quality than if bought new. Got it polished professionally. Ring was better than marriage but that's another story
Go for it

MariePaperRoses · 09/10/2023 20:46

The Royal family and landed gentry have been passing down heirloom jewellery for years.

It's funny how there is a drive to ban plastic etc but pre loves jewellery isn't a topic often discussed.

MrsKarlUrban · 09/10/2023 20:47

My eternity ring is 1930's sapphire and diamond I love it. I love old jewellery

Millybob · 09/10/2023 20:50

I prefer old jewellery, though I think your wedding ring is the ring you were married in - so why not keep your grandmother's?
Think of it as being imbued with all the vibes of a happy marriage.

Apollobinds · 09/10/2023 20:51

Both my engagement and wedding rings are from a second hand jewellers. We were skint back then so it made perfect sense.

Frenchfancy · 09/10/2023 20:54

Yes to second hand/vintage. Both are rings are (30 years married). But would never buy gold jewelry from vinted. You need to go to a proper jewelers to make sure you are getting the real thing.

Original poster
MonChoufleur123 · 09/10/2023 22:11

These are all lovely stories of old rings, thank you! And great advice. Maybe the next step is to take a photo of this ring I like off Vinted to some second hand jewellery shops and see if I can find something similar where it will have been properly valued and cleaned etc. My grandma's ring was her engagement ring so I'd love an eternity band to go alongside it.
Thanks so much everyone who has responded 😊

OP posts:
Tacocatgoatcheesepizza · 09/10/2023 22:15

DH and I both got our wedding rings off EBay!! 15 yrs later I still love it. It’s absolutely right for me and I know this because rings NEVER fit me as my fingers are so tiny. My engagement ring had to be made so much smaller it doesn’t have a hallmark anymore, but this ring fitted perfectly.

DrMarshaFieldstone · 09/10/2023 22:15

Our wedding rings were new but only because we wanted a particular matching style. My engagement ring and almost all of my nice jewellery is antique.

I wouldn’t buy fine jewellery on Vinted though!

newrubylane · 09/10/2023 22:18

If you're not keen on your grandmother'a ring, would you consider having it reworked to your taste. Depending on what you want it can be surprisingly reasonable.