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That horrible feeling when you went out feeling fabulous… and then saw a photo of yourself ☹️

121 replies

ScreenPrinting · 09/09/2023 22:15

Just what the thread title said, really.

I know it’s silly but I’ve felt miserable all day.

I honestly thought I looked great when I went out for a friend’s 50th last night. Not saying I’m a supermodel but I really did think I looked nice. Had an outfit I’d spent time thinking about (I love clothes), my hair done, etc.

Saw the photos this morning as friends started to send them and I look awful. My outfit looked nothing like I thought, I was trying to channel minimalist sophistication but it just looked plain and made me look blobby. I looked much heavier and ‘bigger’ than I thought (I’m not remotely overweight but I definitely could tone up) and my hair looked awful.

I’m not usually critical of my appearance, I’m old enough to accept my bad points and work around them, and emphasise my good points. Which is what I thought I’d done.

I hadn’t. And now I feel really crap about myself, and silly for thinking I looked good. And wondering if I have the energy to start a new fitness/de-blobbing campaign. Which until this morning I didn’t think I was in quite such need of.

Just wondering if anyone else can relate?

BLOODY camera phones ☹️

OP posts:
SomethingNastyInTheBallPool · 09/09/2023 22:16

God, yes. I thought I looked the biz at my cousin’s wedding. Turns out I’m actually a manatee in a pretty dress.

Bogbrushhair · 09/09/2023 22:23

Definitely can. Spent hours getting myself ready for a black tie event, beautiful dress, had my hair done etc etc. thought I looked the bomb! Saw the photos the next day and could’ve wept with shock when I saw a woman who looked old, mumsie, and overdone instead of the version of me that’s in my head. Not sure I’ve recovered!

daisyhead08 · 09/09/2023 22:23

I had to check that I hadn't already replied when I read the above post. Cousins wedding a few weeks ago. I had my hair done, bought a new dress, spent a while doing my make up. Someone took photos on their phone and posted them to Facebook, tagging me. I almost cried.

Twentytwo22 · 09/09/2023 22:24

This but for every photo 😭.
I think I look quite nice in the mirror though!

EarringsandLipstick · 09/09/2023 22:26

Oh I can empathise.

However, I am willing to bet you did look great!

iPhone photos can look crap & not reflective of how you really were.

I also think evening photos never look great - lifting & stuff.

I always hate posed photos - I never seem to look 'like' myself. But more casual, less 'styled' photos I look better.

Jellykat · 09/09/2023 22:28

and thats why i never ever let anyone take my photo! that way i always look bloody amazing Wink

GreyBlackBay · 09/09/2023 22:29

Often but I think since you can never really see yourself from the outside its never likely to match your internal view.

If its really going to matter to you, like with wedding photos that might be on display in a friend's house, get someone to take photos of you when choosing your outfit.

Also be reassured that everyone else feels the same yet you think they look good.

Bey · 09/09/2023 22:35

Meme

it's not just you op there's a viral meme about this.

im sure you looked lovely

Reddit - Dive into anything

https://reddit.com/r/FunnyandSad/s/1vf8UhEdpW

letmesailletmesail · 09/09/2023 22:36

I was at a work event a few months ago and there were photos of it on the work social media accounts. The first one I saw was one I knew was being taken so I'm posed and smiling and thought I looked quite good. I then realised I'm in the background of another photo. Oh my days! I'm not posed and so it is undoubtedly the more real shot. My posture! Also, it's full length so my stomach is evident. Wowzers! I knew I'd put on some menopause weight around my stomach but had kidded myself it wasn't noticeable. It is. Then, more recently, we did a charity day and I realised that I'm in the background of another photo. This time it's a rear view. I'm still in shock. They were my favourite jeans which I have worn hundreds of times over the last couple of years. Straight in a charity shop bag!

EmmaEmerald · 09/09/2023 22:37

Earrings what is "lifting" please?

OP I totally get it. I am on a deblobbing mission and it's not about health. Also, my wonky face shocks me in pictures.

MonkeyPuddle · 09/09/2023 22:39

I bet you wouldn’t think about your mates that way when you look at photos of them x

wineandsun · 09/09/2023 22:44

Yes as above. I think I look awful in a photo and my friends think I look great and vice versa. But genuinely I'm not photogenic and I say this aa knowing someone who really really is. Every photo she is stunning and I look like a potato.

lentilrice · 09/09/2023 22:44

What you forget is that when you are talking to people and moving that you will be animated and looking people in the eye, responding to conversation or talking yourself. No-one is looking at you in a one dimensional way. A photo is a split second snapshot and has nothing to do with how other people see you. When I’m round at my sister’s and she is looking in the mirror, let’s say wearing a new dress and deciding whether to keep it, she makes this ridiculous face, sort of pouting and looking sideways at the mirror. She never looks like that in real life. She’s an attractive animated person but looks really quite odd when she looks at herself in the mirror. She does it in photos too. I think we all do it, whether consciously or unconsciously.

wineandsun · 09/09/2023 22:44

Or as below... I don't know how to tag...

Toughsteak · 09/09/2023 22:45

Does the iPhone camera lie? It captures jowls and double chin that I don't see in the mirror!

cruffinsmuffin · 09/09/2023 22:47

Oh my god ditto 😂

Went to a wedding recently, bought a dress that I thought looked slimming and did hair and makeup. Saw the professional photos and I genuinely look like I've eaten the bridal party!

But in some photos from the same evening I look absolutely fine - I have zero clue what weight adding camera the professional was using 😆

wineandsun · 09/09/2023 22:48

To add, last year my sister got married. I lost about 10lb, had hair and make up done,felt amazing and then some photos my arm looked like a hanging leg of lamb. I see younger girls posing, chin up etc... I need to know how to pose...aged 43

lentilrice · 09/09/2023 22:48

@wineandsun I’m totally unphotogenic and I’ve got a downturned mouth, which doesn’t help. I have to remember that I don’t look like that when I’m actually talking!

LessYappingMoreDoing · 09/09/2023 22:49

@EmmaEmerald i assumed it was supposed to be lighting?

lentilrice · 09/09/2023 22:50

I also untag myself from any photos and will ask for them to be removed if I look particularly awful. I hate it when people post things on facebook without asking if it is alright.

Crucible · 09/09/2023 22:51

I am not photogenic at all, I look awful, with the exception I think of one or two shots in my life, it is what it is. Cameras do lie! It's a flattening of a 3dimensional person, so it is not the whole you.

Lovebali · 09/09/2023 22:52

lentilrice · 09/09/2023 22:44

What you forget is that when you are talking to people and moving that you will be animated and looking people in the eye, responding to conversation or talking yourself. No-one is looking at you in a one dimensional way. A photo is a split second snapshot and has nothing to do with how other people see you. When I’m round at my sister’s and she is looking in the mirror, let’s say wearing a new dress and deciding whether to keep it, she makes this ridiculous face, sort of pouting and looking sideways at the mirror. She never looks like that in real life. She’s an attractive animated person but looks really quite odd when she looks at herself in the mirror. She does it in photos too. I think we all do it, whether consciously or unconsciously.

This

PurpleMonkeys · 09/09/2023 22:57

Not just photos.

Recently I went out thinking I looked fine. Headed into town and felt confident and happy... walked into my favourite little cafe... stood in line, looked to the left at the drinks fridge and saw my reflection...
There was an overweight, sweaty, saggy, hair everywhere person looking back.. and then followed me home.

Rubiconmango · 09/09/2023 22:57

My friend is a photographer and thankfully years ago she told me cameras make us all look healthier than we actually are and while they capture memories, pictures are not 100% accurate. Never felt bad about a picture since! Pictures for me are just memories of good times! If I think I look a million dollars in real life, then I do, and no picture on earth can make me doubt that! I'd believe a mirror over a picture (especially a smart phone picture) any day, and if all else failed, that gleaming joy of feeling a million dollars supercedes any picture that you won't be looking at for a long time! So continue feeling amazing! 😌

FlamingoQueen · 09/09/2023 23:05

I do not photograph well at all! I think I look okay and then this big ugly blob appears in the photos (with a big nose as well) and I don’t really understand why!

Please do not put yourself down - you may not photograph well, but you can still be totally awesome and gorgeous x