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Original poster

Nowhere to wear nice clothes?

47 replies

BansheeofInisherin · 14/07/2023 09:23

Have recently lost weight, and am very proud of myself because I am 51, and it's involved super human self-control. I have a decent enough figure now, so bought myself some nice clothes and funky jewellery.

Then I realised I only ever wear leggings these days because I
WFH most days. V occ go into the office but everyone is in jeans
Go for a long jog/walk most days and sit on park benches
Live in London Zone 3 where no one ever dresses up
Take public transport only
I go out often with Dh or friends, but with the CoL rarely to posh restaurants, mostly to cafes, local theatre, free museums, and galleries where everyone is in jeans and sweats
DH is the most dressed down man I know. Will not wear anything but jeans and a very old polo shirt.

If you have a similar life, where do you wear nice clothes? Do you just put on your Max Mara to go to the shops? ( Not that I have bought any Max Mara).

OP posts:

LadyBird1973 · 14/07/2023 09:42

I think a lot of people are similar now. Even 'dressy' places aren't as dressy as they used to be. I think you just have to wear your nice stuff in your normal life and make your dh not wear trackies to a gallery if you've made the effort to wear nice stuff.

Wisterical · 14/07/2023 09:44

I buy a mix of second-hand and expensive clothes in the sales (expensive for me eg £100 trousers). I love all my clothes and wear whichever are my favourites every day, whatever I'm doing, and I'm NEVER going anything impressive or 'posh'! I think it depends who you are dressing for.

beguilingeyes · 14/07/2023 09:53

I do think it's sad. I'm mostly in jeans/leggings but I do like to get dressed up occasionally. I like a nice frock. People don't really dress up for anything any more. Weddings and Ascot maybe (never been to Ascot).
Years ago I went to a ballet at the Royal Opera House and everyone was done up to the nines. Perhaps I should go there more often.

Sunnydays0101 · 14/07/2023 09:55

I just wear my nice clothes, they aren’t dressy dressy but I have a rule that leggings and the like are for exercise only. So I have a mix of casual dresses, skirts, jeans, trousers, sweaters, shirts and tops that I wear day to day. I have some pieces that I keep for the weekend to make the weekends feel more special iykwim. I actually do have several Max Mara coats and jackets and wear all the time as I absolutely love them and feel they elevate anything.

I don’t care how DH or anyone else I’m with dresses, I just wear what I want.

EllaPaella · 14/07/2023 10:08

Very similar life and also hardly ever seem to go to events such as weddings or occasions that require really getting dressed up. So I try to enjoy casual dressing as much as possible and to be fair I love wearing jeans but make casual as 'dressy' as I can.
I dress up to go out to eat or for cocktails with friends on the weekend. Yes lots of people dress very casually to go out now but where I live it's still perfectly acceptable to dress up as much as you like on the weekend.
I wouldn't save your nice clothes for 'best'. Just put them on and relish that feeling of enjoying your clothes and feeling good in them.

Sunnydays0101 · 14/07/2023 10:31

I think it’s Trinny that says dress for the life you lead - so have some nice exercise clothes for your exercise - rather than an old mish-mash of leggings and tops for example. Nice casual clothes - jeans, dresses, skirts, tops, shirts, trousers, etc and then some ‘elevated’ items that can be worn to restaurants/weekend outings, etc. Coats & jackets and bag that elevate an outfit, etc. Good shoes/trainers. Jewellery.

So not ‘dressed up’ as such but more nicely dressed. Even casual clothes don’t have to be boring, dull and blah!

FeigningConcern · 14/07/2023 10:57

Nice clothes and dressy clothes aren't necessarily the same thing. I have loads of nice casual clothes.

plasticwallet · 14/07/2023 11:04

Get out of London more!

I love going to family events in my parents country as you can go big, you're expected to go big.

I've always errrd towards casual but things have got very casual now.

plasticwallet · 14/07/2023 11:07

posted too soon.

I find if I meet friends in outer zones things are a bit more dressy.

Zipps · 14/07/2023 11:16

I only have nice clothes so don't have a choice. They're not all dressy though but they are quality.
I stopped buying 'it'll do' stuff years ago.
What's the point in having nice stuff and keeping it until it's gone out of date or your style has changed? If you have bought nice clothes that fit you well, wear them! Sod what anyone else is thinking/wearing.

EffortlessDesmond · 14/07/2023 11:34

All my clothes are nice. I wear them to do ordinary stuff, including walking the dog and going to the supermarket. If I was going to a dressy occasion and didn't have the right thing to wear, I'd probably hire it.

SurpriseSparDay · 14/07/2023 11:55

So recognise this problem - particularly since Covid!

The difficulty for me is that I do have intermittent meetings and events where it pays to be as well presented as I possibly can be - a week here, a couple of days there, a one hour face to face after a six hour round trip … But the rest of the time I’m at home in rags.

During the lockdowns I bought a few really beautiful things in expectation of imminent release into a celebratory world. Which never really materialised. I’ve always bought lovely clothes, but I detest waste - and now, for the first time in my life, I have clothes piling up unworn. (Not a huge amount, but any number is too many.)

I do think we have to adapt to reality. I’m shopping for a festival at the moment, and trying really hard only to buy things I’m likely to wear in normal life going into Autumn.

Xrays · 14/07/2023 11:58

I don’t think anyone dresses up anymore except for a special night out or if they work in a particular type of corporate industry.

When I was much younger I worked in marketing as a senior account manager and I worked in the city, near Liverpool Street in London. I wore a skirt suit everyday, high heels, the works.

Now I live rurally and I spend my life in stretchy comfy baggy clothes because they’re practical and comfortable. I have to say it’s one of the things that puts me off bothering to lose the 3.5 stone I should really lose because I honestly think what is the point? It won’t change what I wear or how I feel about myself, and I’ll just sit there miserable because I denied myself nice stuff to eat! 😆

Okaydonkey · 14/07/2023 13:08

Wear the clothes. I often get asked if I’m going somewhere nice. I like clothes- I buy nice clothes. I’m wearing the clothes, regardless.

You just have to be prepared to stick out in a crowd!

Wiennetta · 14/07/2023 13:32

I have a similar lifestyle, I have lots of nice clothes but they’re suitable for the lifestyle I have.

For example, if I’m wearing jeans and a jumper to go to the pub, I wear a really well fitting pair of jeans, great pair of boots, cashmere or similar jumper, and I do have a Max Mara wool coat which I would definitely chuck on and wear to the pub.

For me it’s about having the best version of the clothes that suit your lifestyle - it’s not worth me having loads of cocktail dresses so I have a couple that I like and enjoy wearing, but I spend more money on things like jeans, trousers, coats, knitwear (absolutely love luxe knitwear) and coats. I have a great collection and if I’m wearing jeans and a jumper at the pub - or at the office to be honest - I still feel good in it.

Wiennetta · 14/07/2023 13:34

Also I do have leggings etc that I wear for working at home but I have a really nice pair of faux leather leggings and some good thick leggings I wear with big oversized cashmere jumpers and chunky boots. Still feel perfectly presentable and nice if I go out at lunchtime or go to the pub after work.

In summer I also wear wide leg trousers and tees for comfy home wear that still feels good.

Sunnydays0101 · 14/07/2023 13:47

Xrays · 14/07/2023 11:58

I don’t think anyone dresses up anymore except for a special night out or if they work in a particular type of corporate industry.

When I was much younger I worked in marketing as a senior account manager and I worked in the city, near Liverpool Street in London. I wore a skirt suit everyday, high heels, the works.

Dressing up has changed as it’s more a relaxed vibe now. I think while people got into the habit wearing any old thing during covid times, people are beginning to want to dress well (again) but in a more relaxed way.

Lose the 3.5 stone for your health if nothing else but there’s a lot of clothes out there which are practical and comfortable but not baggy. You could go for a relaxed layered look in jersey fabrics. I find most clothes to be comfortable if they fit properly anyway.

The new ‘dressing up’ isn’t wearing cocktail or body-con dresses or high heels but clothes which are well made that suit the life you lead. Clothes that will age well and can be worn and worn and stepping away from fast fashion.

userxx · 14/07/2023 13:59

Was just thinking about this before, I'm meeting up with some mates soon for a boozy afternoon sesh, usually its really casual but I thought bollocks to that so have ordered a new dressy jumpsuit, I really feel like getting glammed up.

LifeExperience · 14/07/2023 14:00

I wear my nice clothes to church.

Louloulouenna · 14/07/2023 14:05

I’m always overdressed but I simply don’t care. It is depressing though when you get an invitation for a lovely summer party and the dress code is “casual”. I can be casual any time I like but the opportunity to wear a beautiful party outfit is all too rare these days.

That’s why I absolutely love Royal Ascot - the one event where everyone really dresses up.

Tahitiansummer · 14/07/2023 14:05

Max Mara is part of my usual daily wardrobe so I wouldn't think twice about wearing it. I live rurally now but love to planning outfits.

Thisisthescene · 14/07/2023 14:53

Some quirky restaurants encourage you to dress up still which I love

plasticwallet · 14/07/2023 15:04

When I talk about dressing up though I mean full on Met Gala/Golden Globes. I still dress nice casually (or think I do) but you can't really rock full on glam in normal life generally.

CallMeDiaz · 14/07/2023 15:27

This is why working from home is rubbish for me!

I have also lost loads of weight and love wearing new stuff to the office. I wear my favourite things and don't care if I'm more dressy than others.

LoobyDop · 14/07/2023 16:22

I wear nice clothes every day, never just leggings or tracky bottoms. When I go into the office I step it up a bit and dress slightly more smartly than necessary- we have a casual dress code, but I always wear a blazer, or proper trousers rather than jeans, or even both at once. If I go out in the evening I wear a nice top, or dress, or jumpsuit, even if everyone else is in jeans and jumpers. It depresses me when people go out for dinner in jeans and jumpers- it’s supposed to be a bit special.

During the first, most hideous bit of lockdown, when we couldn’t do ANYTHING, I used to look forward to the weekly supermarket shop and plan my outfit for it. I knew it was ridiculous at the time, but it was pretty much the only thing that made me feel like I was still alive.

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