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Sick of shopping with my own mother (body issues)

3 replies

Hesxboon · 19/06/2023 17:33

Very close to my mum and we go out together at least a few times a month, we have a family holiday coming up in September and we have been out shopping for holiday clothes recently.
ive noticed she seems to put me down a lot, I have put weight on but I’m not terribly
overweight & can find nice comfortable clothes I feel confident in normally but now she’s made me hate myself! Everything I step out in she says is too small, I need a better bra, my belly is showing and the one I normally get is I need a bigger size ( even when it fits me!) I really don’t get why she is being like this. I noticed yesterday when we went shopping a lovely slim woman in a shorts and crop top walked past us and my mom gave her a horrible dirty look, I’m starting to think maybe she’s just projecting her own insecurities onto me and others. Tbh I’m normally a strong person but I now feel like I look hideous in everything, even when I’m out on my own trying on clothes I feel like nothing feels right on me anymore and can hear her telling me I look ridiculous. I’m not an instagram
model by a long shot but don’t think I look too bad! I’m just wondering why she is doing it or I’m right in thinking she’s just being completely
honest & I look awful.

OP posts:
Booklover40 · 19/06/2023 17:34

Stop going shopping with your mother?

Booklover40 · 19/06/2023 17:36

Oh, And tell her if she doesn’t have anything nice to say, you’d rather she didn’t say anything at all. I did this with my own dm and tbf to her she really seems to be trying - but watching her physically try to stop her mouth from forming the words sometimes is amusing, she’s so programmed to say critical things!

She needs it spelling out to her. Tell her how it makes you feel.

thedevilinablackdress · 19/06/2023 18:21

Very much projecting her insecurities. Stop shopping with her, stop discussing clothes etc. Challenge her if she's rude. It's the only way. My DM was only a fraction as bad as yours, and I still never wore shorts until I was nearly 50 because of HER insecurities about her legs.

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