Having a bad body image day, and also coming to terms with a tragic loss, but need to pack for our holiday - mentally drained, so help would be wonderful!

[JemimaPyjamas]

I am away for three weeks and need to start making a list to gradually get my bag ready. I also want to feel as good as I can about my appearance and hope it'll perk me up a bit. I keep half heartedly looking at various sites and either lose interest or find I have ordered the wrong size or shape so send it back.

Details about me is; I am basically 'round.' I am about an 16 (obviously this varies between shops) but I dislike fitted clothes. My boobs are quite big but my main issue is my stomach. I have no waist (even when thin!) I am 5ft 5 and my legs are okay, and I can kind of cope with my arms (they won't win any awards but out of areas that need to be flattered, my stomach is more important.) I feel a lot better with a tan, and don't burn easily (and have spf 50 on anyway) so I don't feel like I need to be too covered up in the daytime.
Oh, and I am 47. If they weren't so overpriced / expensive, I like shops like Free People and Cabbages and Roses. I don't like looking 'done' and I don't even know where our iron is now, so I certainly won't be prioritising it on holiday!

Holiday is tropical, generally between 28-32 during the day and we will be both sightseeing and sitting around a pool.

So far I have bought these and also have two dresses that are pretty much the same but longer. I have some shorts which are okay. I am travelling in the trousers I am about to link which will probably get lots of wear but also want something airy, comfy and 'me' for evenings. These are the trousers these which are very comfortable but also look like pyjamas! I'd like to look casually smartish for some of the time, rather than 'middle aged backpacker', if that makes sense. Or at least a bit put together!

I have this as an arm cover for the evening (for bugs as well as enthusiastic air con.)

I did buy this from Zara to go with a loose top but it didn't sit right and I felt both fat and constricted (so I don't think it was simply sizing.)

Is this enough info...? Any inspo is good - I can't really go mad with £££, and it seems silly mainly on the basis of a holiday, but I'd also rather have a couple of things I love than a full case of semi disposable clothes.

The photo one is Next

I recently bought this dress for post operation when I needed something loose over my stomach. It’s surprisingly flattering, doesn’t crease much for linen and really cool in the heat ( come up quite big). It’s also in blue. Might be good for sightseeing.

https://www.johnlewis.com/john-lewis-v-neck-linen-dress/natural/p110077927

Have you had a look at some midsize insta pages for ideas. There's a girl I like called taryntruly and she's an American 14 (so I think an 18 UK) and she dresses really well for her apple shape. She's 5ft6 (same as me) and I find it helpful to see everyday looks on a curvier shape.

Have a wee search of midsize fashion and you'll see lots of styles for ideas. Good luck and enjoy your holiday!

Have you thought of shopping when you get there? I always do this in Asia and Africa. In Singapore we bought the most amazing linen clothes, Silk in Hong Kong, batik in Seychelles and Guadalupe and you don't look like a tourist. Also fab cotton in Sri Lanka and Malaysia.

Do you like linen?

Trousers
https://www.poetryfashion.co.uk/product-UQ11-POESTJ/colour-c-aqua/trousers-shorts/cropped-trousers-in-hightwist-linen.htm

Dress
https://www.poetryfashion.co.uk/product-UQ19-POESDS/colour-b-ocean-ecru/dresses-skirts/round-neck-dress-with-seam-details.htm

What about this www.rosypenguin.com/collections/dresses/products/adeline-cheesecloth-balloon-dress-in-neon-yellow ? They have it in other colours if yellow is too bright for you.

Or I'm not overly fond of this myself www.rosypenguin.com/collections/dresses/products/eb-ive-plumeria-dress-in-moss-one-size but might be more your style.

If you're travelling though Asia you will need natural fabrics due to the humidity.
It's not just the heat there. I lived in Asia for 7 years & became acclimatised. But going back i still find it uncomfortable.
So sleeveless cotton/linen dresses, vest tops, cotton skirts, shirts etc. Otherwise you will feel find it unbearable.

All of these dresses look like potato sacks never seen anything like it. Surely we can do better

I was waiting for your more stylish suggestions. Perhaps you forgot to post them.

Well you certainly did !
Seriously people cant walk around like this and pay £100 for the privilege. Madness

@3BSHKATS again let's see what your alternatives are.

If you read the OPs posts she likes a certain style, it may not be my taste, but no point linking to garments she isn't going to wear.

@rookiemere I like the yellow one, thank you.

@3BSHKATS My original post wasn't asking for a critique of how I dress, it was asking for help with finding things I like as I am currently really struggling and grieving so mustering the energy to trawl through shops, online and in real life, isn't something I feel able to do. Sometimes some empathy goes a long way.

@LivelyBlake I do like linen and have some blue trousers very similar to the one's you linked. I am not so keen on the dress though, but thank you.

@JemimaPyjamas do you like those dresses ?

@Doggymummar I'm going to Cambodia, I used to work there and was there for 4 years. I can possibly get stuff there but would rather it was something I to do if I fancied it, rather than because I had come with a semi empty case! It seems hard enough getting my shit together to browse the internet at home at the moment sometimes.

Narrowing it down, I think I basically need a dress or two, and maybe a couple of shirts / tops and some of the pointers on here have been really useful as I kept looking in the same shops and getting nowhere. I don't need to be particularly smart, but there will be times meeting old friends or colleagues where I want to be a bit less casual than just shorts and a tshirt. It's the wet season so it'll be hot but not as horrendously hot as it can be at the start of the year, but I hate anything fitted even when I'm in the UK.

I'm sorry for your loss @JemimaPyjamas . It must seem trivial to shop under the circumstances.
Are you looking for dresses to keep & last? Or are you looking for inexpensive ones just for this holiday?
Wrap london & Poetry are a good call for beautiful dresses & cotton skirts.
H&M for inexpensive cool cotton muslin dresses & Zara/M&S have some gems.
How much do you want to spend?
And do you want short sleeves, sleeveless or ones you can roll up?

Good question! I’m not entirely sure either. On one hand I try not to buy things that aren’t likely to last, but on the other hand it’d be good to have something that’s not too precious or expensive as, Sod’s Law, it’ll be the time I get it caught as I get out a tuk-tuk.

I was semi tempted by a few of the Zara dresses I saw but find their sizing a bit hit and miss which doesn’t help in the ego dept. Plus, their models are always stick thin so you can never quite tell! H&M are often great for basics, but I’ve not seen anything quite right just yet but I keep looking. I’ll have a look at M&S, I’ve got a beach shirt thing from there that was great last year.

Will check Wrap London and Poetry as never looked there before.

Wrap London look as if they'd be worth a good look but the website doesn't seem to be showing the actual dresses! Argh!

There's some lovely shirt dresses on the Poetry website. I find shirt dresses or flowing v necked dresses forgiving & easy to wear. I'm hoping Wrap are reducing their prices right now & that's why it's down.

I’ve looked at the Wrap Facebook page and got the gist of the prices. If they’re well made and just right it’d be worth it, but I can’t tell just yet. I am also looking on EBay and Vinted as that might be fruitful.

About to look on the Poetry one now too…

Have a look here

https://mabeapparel.com/collections/dresses
But H & M have some lightweight tunic dresses

I’m currently sweltering in Paris with similar issues and I discovered this brand, all loose linen and they ship internationally… https://www.ninakendosa.com/

@Smoleymoley Ooooh! They are far cheaper than I anticipated. Thanks for that!

@justawee i like some of those but need to wait to look properly on my laptop to work out whether they’ll like me… but thank you. All these suggestions for places I wouldn’t necessarily look or know about is just what I need.

@JemimaPyjamas have you considered Anthropologie? You and I have similar taste and I often find things there which I like.

this looks good?

https://www.anthropologie.com/en-gb/shop/the-kallie-flowy-midi-dress?category=dresses&color=011&type=REGULAR&quantity=1