What has happened to me!? I look awful

[OatMilkLattes]

Hi there, I’m hoping this is the right place to post and it may be a long one so thanks for reading.

I’ve massively lost my mojo. I’m nearly 30 and I’ve never felt more shit in my life. 0 energy, I look pale/almost grey and my body has changed to something I don’t like or recognise. I look at other women around me and wonder why my DP is with me because they are all so beautiful and take such great care of themselves.

I used to (stupidly) go on sunbeds and lots of holidays when I was younger so always had a great tan. I have given that all up and really try not to expose my skin to the sun too much anymore, but I just look so ill all the time as a result. I look back on pics of when I had a tan and I just look so much healthier. I’ve tried fake tans/gradual tans but they either go patchy or make me rashy as I have sensitive skin, so I have given up with that.

I would say my diet is ok - I’m vegetarian so I do eat a lot of fruits and veggies etc. But I know it could be better.

Working out - I just hate it and can’t ever get into it! I know it’ll make me look and feel better about myself but I just can’t stick at it, and ever.

I do drink a lot of water and am now trying to avoid alcohol completely for a while. I have smoked on and off since I was a teen - mostly when I’ve had a glass of wine, I’ll end up wanting a few puffs on a cigarette.

I do have a skincare routine consisting of high quality products and active ingredients which I am happy with - only recently started this though so I need to keep going with that before I see a difference I think.

I’m not sure what the point of this post is tbh - I just feel so so low about my appearance. Maybe this is just part of getting older and I have to accept my body/face isn’t going to look the same as it did in my early 20s.

Does anyone feel the same, how do I get past this feeling of low self worth and does anyone have any tips?! I would be so grateful.

Thank you!

Of course you don’t have to accept feeling like this! You’ve started with your skincare regime which is great. If you haven’t added them already, vitamin c is great for brightening the skin and retinol for anti-aging. I use tretinoin from skin & me which is prescription strength retinol (let me know if you want a referral link).

With exercise, you need to find something you enjoy. I too find gyms boring but I love Pilates classes with a good instructor and Zumba for cardio. Losing weight is simple in terms of eating a calorie deficit but really hard in sticking to it! You don’t have to lose weight to look good but I find I feel better when I do.

Buying yourself some new clothes might make you feel better about your look too. Take care

Get a blood test to check for deficiencies and other possible things making your energy dive such as sugar levels and thyroid. If you're having other symptoms it might be an underlying condition.

Exercise is like eating vegetables or drinking water or going to work and paying bills. You don't have to like it you just have to do it. There'll be something out there that doesn't bore you to tears. Do your clothes fit? If they don't get some new ones. You might want to lose weight but you are where you are for now and need to accept it. Normally I'd say it's unlikely you look ill and it's just you're used to seeing "tanned you", but you've got no energy so if you're not stressed or any other reason that could explain it then maybe you've got an underlying condition. Not pregnant are you?