Frugal elegance? Is there such a thing?

[coffeeginandkindness]

So I am a mess both physically and financially

Want 2023 to be my comeback year, but short on funds to do it

I am 3 stone overweight and hair hasn't been professionally coloured since before covid. I was using Josh wood colour but even that is quite £ for me at the moment

Using Nivea day cream and some Rimmel lip stick

But looking for ways to feel better while I try and work out ways to shift the weight and look more put together rather than like a brown paper bag

Anyone else?

Charity shops for clothes. Look for charity shops near you, if any, that price their items uniformly, for example, tops for £2 etc. Look at other ones who might charge more but who charge more for better brands and see if there is anything that would elevate your look and that you could use with cheaper pieces.

Look in to training hair salons near you ( check your local FE college) and see what their prices are like for a cut/ colour etc.

Drink lots of water
Try to get 8hrs sleep a night
Clean filed nails

Can you afford to save a few £ a week towards hair dye/basic make up/charity shop or sale clothes?
When losing weight on maternity leave I used to think I could spend £1.50 on chocolate etc or put it away to look/feel better.

Sleep, eat well, exercise.
Wear the lipstick.
Get rid of clothes that don't fit or suit you.

Drink lots water
get some exercise everyday - even 10 press-ups, 10 star jumps , run feet standing still 1 min and realest for 10 mins- make yourself puffed
beauty salons and hairdresser training schools
a scarf makes me instantly chic
polish your winter shoes / boots
go through wardrobe - anything that is holes, worn throw.
if simple repair then repair… I use a Japanese Technique of visible mending ( name escapes me but translated means “little stabs” - there are instructions on a Toast website with video ( Toast as in clothing not butter and marmalade!).
if ok condition but makes makes you feel awful either sell or charity shop.
look to see if there are 33 items you can mix and match and wear with balance tops and bottoms - search Project 33 - if anything missing then look e bay or vinted
dresses are great - layer over pants winter, autumn , wear with sandals spring/ summer.
I am short and dresses give more of a line. If you have a good waist can belt a dress .
Best wishes!

I never struggle with weight but I hardly snack. That might work instead of focusing on ‘healthy snacks’

Do you paint your nails? I always like looking at my fingers when they’re done.

Give yourself a pedicure.

Do you moisturise your body? That can make you feel better. You could also exfoliate in the shower with a face cloth or rough mit.

Try the Sudocrem face mask.

Leave conditioner on for longer when you wash your hair. Actually blow dry or straighten carefully rather than in a hurry.

Yes good plan on the training salon, I have just found one... may be will look into that

Vinted and charity shops for clothing.

For beauty, go through Quidco and use Sephora or Superdrug. I've gone from using Charlotte tilbury to Elf which is even better and a fraction of the cost. It's 10% back on Quidco and if you earn vouchers on Sephora.

Always use Quidco for your online purchases, I had £400ish which I used for last Christmas

Get yourself to Wilko for super cheap makeup. The gel nail polish at £1.60 and mascara at a couple of quid are particularly good value.

Charity shops and eBay (if you know the brand for the latter). Be a bit patient and only buy stuff you really like.

Try and scrape the cash for home colour - you wear your hair every day. Trainee cut as PP says.

Rimmel lipstick is great. Wear it always - it becomes a signature. One moisturiser is much the same as another, so you are OK there. I think a proper cleanse with a flannel really does wonders for skin - Superdrug vitamin E cleanser is great, and get a few flannels.

If you like perfume it really makes you feel like you bothered. if there’s one you know you like set up an alert on eBay - you can often pick things up.

Similarly I think always wearing earrings - even simple studs or hoops helps make you look and feel put together, if you don’t have them check charity shops.

It’s worth asking if your GP does membership of WW or a gym, or just a weight loss group - sometimes they do a few months. Some of them are starting to do green prescriptions.

Local walking group / ramblers. green gym. Do you have one of those outdoor gyms in a park nearby?

If you have Wi-Fi lots of exercise online. Yoga with Adrienne is good if yoga appeals.

I agree with pp on clothes shopping in charity shops and only buying good quality materials (cotton, linen, angora, wool etc) if you can find it in those shops. It might take regular visits and a lot of patience, but eventually something to suit your tastes will turn up, and you can slowly start improving the quality of your wardrobe over time.

Ditto for leather bags and shoes.

Use your Boots/ Superdrug/ Tesco points for items such as:
Shoe / bag polish
Face mask sachets
Good hair products (masks etc)
Or get these items from Poundland if you don't have enough points on a loyalty card. Sometimes some really good brands can be found at Poundland (I've found Eucerin bath soak for Kids and lots of good face mask sachets in addition to shampoo like Kevin Murphy & Yes to Cucumber at Poundland).

Buy nice hair products that you don't have enough points for only when they are on offer (E.g. half price or 3 for 2 etc) from the supermarket, or from B&M.

When the weather gets better, go to car boot sales, there are often good clothes and shoes at rock bottom prices available. Just dress warmly and be friendly to the sellers (they are usually a lovely bunch), and be willing to chat and haggle.

Finally, have a clothes swap party with 2-3 close friends/ family members.

I'd start with my hair - as others have said, contact your local hairdressing training college and book yourself in to see a student. Students are carefully overseen by a qualified hairdresser, who won't let them mess up your hair. I've had excellent haircuts from there (often better than at a proper salon)

Read some of the beauty threads on here to get ideas for cheap skincare. You only really need a few bits. Skincare: face moisturiser, body moisturiser, hand cream, lip balm. Baby oil is good stuff (removing eye makeup, using on wet skin instead of moisturiser). Bar soap is fine to use on body and face for cleansing, as long as you moisturise afterwards.

Make up: tinted moisturiser and mascara are all you need really. Again, look on the threads on here to find what's good. People on here rave about Aldi for make up and skincare, so it might be worth a trip there.

For clothes, go through your wardrobe and throw out anything which you haven't worn in a year or doesn't fit. Look at what you've got left and work out what outfits you have. Then work out what gaps you have. Read threads on here to find which brands etc are good and really plan what you want. Then try to target items on eBay / Vinted. It's better to get quality second hand stuff than supermarket / Primark stuff. It's better quality and will fit you better. This thread helped me:

www.mumsnet.com/talk/mumsnet_classics/3797652-thanks-to-s-b-i-m-finally-winning-in-the-pursuit-of-elegance

Definitely start with your hair!

@coffeeginandkindness The chances are that if you go to a training salon for your hair then there is a good chance of beauty treatments being offered too.

I use a training salon for my hair and not only is it cheap but the students, in my experience, are carefully monitored like. PP said.

Also if you are considering Weight Watchers then have a look for offers online which could could the price of a monthly subscription. You can do it online so no having to go weigh in and attend classes as they offer digital only membership.

I never struggle with weight but I hardly snack. That might work instead of focusing on ‘healthy snacks’
This. Just eat meals, and make them mainly veg with protein. Learn what real hunger is. The carb craving you get 2 or 3 hours after a carb-heavy meal or snack isn't the same.

Charity shops are great. Put some care into the styling and you'll look elegant.

Embrace your natural hair colour or go to the local college.

Thanks for all the replies. I am definitely suffering from a case of neglect. We have been through a really stressful few years and money is just constantly tight. ebay has always been successful for me - I need to just get out and do green gym type things - I know walking will be good for mental health, complexion everything. And I have found a salon at a college - I am selfemployed so should be able to do that .

Maybe look at Lottie Pilates on YouTube too. You just need a mat and it’s very gentle. She has things such as a two week plan and a lot of the days are only 20 minutes. I find it very relaxing, and it’s nice to stretch out tense muscles.

Right there with you, @coffeeginandkindness. I usually try to look after myself but repeated viruses have left me looking unrecognisable.

Anyway …

Cut out processed food and spend the money on a weekly veg box. If you eat four times as much fruit and veg as before, for three months, you’ll see the difference in your skin and weight.

Hair and teeth are inevitably going to cost money. Long term project …

Exercise. I much prefer beach walks to germ laden gyms - but even a skipping rope at home will make you stronger and fitter.

As others have said , go through your clothes and alter or get rid of anything shabby, ill fitting or that doesn’t make you feel beautiful. (Or at least keep those things for gardening only.)

Wear any nice jewellery you have. Treat yourself to some lovely footwear. Order perfume samples from somewhere like Bloom or Les Senteurs - they add optimism to every foray outside the house.

As for frugality in dress, you might enjoy this thread:

www.mumsnet.com/talk/style_and_beauty/4723489-where-to-find-slow-fashion?reply=123243827

Ooh yes this sounds good. I do love Adrienne too, but struggle to get started

Drink lots of water
Get plenty of sleep- if you're struggling, an audio book or guided meditation can help. I can always see on my face if I've slept well or not
Exercise - even a walk or a run if you can - really brightens your skin and brings out your glow
Concealer under the eyes
I use Olia for my hair as the hairdresser got a bit much. Now I use it and just have a trim every few months - 2 for £12 in tesco for the Olia
Get a hair mask or balm- you'll get one for only a few quid in a pharmacy or supermarket and leave it in for at least a few hours once a week for amazing silky hair
Use lip balm at night
I think you said it's a day moisturiser you have - the night moisturiser of the same brand will be the same price but much more moisturisation. I occasionally use my DH's as well