How to look a bit better!

[Millie2008]

Hi wise ones!
Ok so, very unusual for me to post on this board, as I'm just useless and clueless when it comes to anything style let alone beauty! But here goes...

I'm 37 with 2 young children (5 and 3). Although I was previously very career driven, becoming a mum has totally taken over my life as my eldest has quite significant additional needs including autism. I'm now very isolated. And as a result feel like I just look awful all the time!
I've never been someone who's overly interested in clothes, and have never worn makeup. My daily routine has always been very simple; shower, a light moisturiser on my face and that's it. I think I used to get away with it pre-children as I had quite a youthful face! But recently when I've seen my reflection I've been quite shocked! I think the sleepless nights and general stress of my life have caught up with me.

I'd like to just feel a little better about myself. But don't have the time or mental energy to spend too much time on "upkeep" (if that's the right word!)- but just wanted a few tips or pointers. Like, 3 basic things that will make my face look acceptable! I know I need a haircut too, and need to stop just wearing joggers or leggings because they are practical for my lifestyle! Or maybe there are ways of making joggers and leggings acceptable?! I see other mums in causal clothes and they look amazing! I think maybe because their faces look better...

Anyway, any thoughts appreciated :-)

This is what I do to look presentable:

• wear mascara (very fair and fine eyelashes otherwise, tinting is a waste of money as it does not make any difference)
• blow dry my hair (makes a massive difference when I can be bothered and looks presentable for an extra day)
• nice coat (I have a casual coat in a stand out colour and I get lots of compliments on it)

Have you thought about Bare Minerals OP? Their complexion rescue is amazing and perfect if you're coming from a no make up position. A good bronzer (I can't see past Chanel) will contour and wake up the face - you can also use it over the eyelids too. Mascara, lips, done for an 'im awake' finish!

I have started using tanning drops on my face, it makes a huge difference to general well looking, just a bit of colour and improves complexion. Keep brows tidy and fill in gaps. Keep hair sleek and healthy looking. Well fitting basic classic clothes. If you have a few pounds to lose, that will make a big difference

They are tan luxe drops

They are tan luxe drops

Hair blow dried and eyebrows on as I’m pale, makes a massive difference. I’m thinking teeth whitening would be great to brighten my look but haven’t done it yet.

If you’re pale (?) it can be easy to look washed out so I would second tanning drops added to your moisturiser or a tinted moisturiser. Conceal dark circles, mascara, blush. Five minutes.

Longer term there is some good advice on looking after your skin here.

You wear your hair every day so keeping on top of that is key imo.

What a lovely thread .. reading all though I'm 20 years older 🤭

Really want to make more effort , find myself again and look forward to a happier 2023

Not really a S&B point but have you registered with a carers charity and looked into carer meet-ups and schemes tailored to help your dc? Part of my feeling tired was feeling alone with it all. I sympathise with the relentless sleep deprivation.

Tinted moisturiser and a nice lipstick is a good shout, and earrings, all good advice.

My go to are shirts under oversized v neck jumpers. I suit black and white and silver, so I would wear a white shirt, black xl jumper and a chunky silver necklace. Makes me look put together.
M&S has an array of trousers, the palazzo ones seem to be in favour, have a look.

I wear Olay BB cream, eyeliner, mascara and blush.
HTH

This is a super thread - I am taking notes

I am (almost) mid forties with young children and a full on job. I need to work harder now than I used to to look presentable but I have one or two things which work ok for me.

I wear erborian CC cream. I makes a huge difference to how I look and then feel first thing.

i use blusher - just a couple of spots brings colour to my face. Otherwise I looks really drawn

sleep in earrings and necklace. I also have a ring and a bracelet that I wear every day. This helps me feel done.

I keep a lipstick and a clinique chubby stick in the car. When I park up I often stick a quick sweep on. I never ever reapply during the day but at least I walk in done.

I don’t drink enough water. I don’t get enough sleep and I treat my hair terribly.

beyond the makeup bits I have been working on improving my posture and frowning less. I know that sounds stupid but I need to lift my head, loosen my face muscles and just smile slightly and I look infinitely better.

Oh, and while I am carrying more weight than I should I have edged away from
trousers and go for dresses and cardigans. A frock, cardy and a scarf is my literal day to day look. It’s not fashionable but it means I am not worried about looking lumpy which then impacts on my confidence which then means hunching and frowning

It depends on your good points and bad points I think and we are all different. I have to wear lots of mascara as my hair lashes are fair and I always wear eye makeup whereas I’ve got a friend who wears no make up except red lipstick and she looks fab.

I’ve got a couple of friends who do nothing to their hair, no colour or blow dry, just a lovely short cut on thick hair and they can wash and go. I have to make a lot more effort for my hair to look nice and the Babyliss Bighair works for me.

Similarly with clothes. You need to find what suits you. I don’t suit the dress and trainers look and a midi skirt looks awful on my waist. I look better in trousers and I have given up on jeans. I use Pinterest for ideas and then I know what to shop for. I order online and try on at home.

SPF separate to your moisturiser

Wow!! Thank you so much everyone! Loads of great advice 😊 Sorry it's been a crazy morning so can't reply properly, but going to read everything carefully later and make a new years plan of action

I second eyebrows! I’m similar age and also don’t wear much makeup, but tinted tidy eyebrows and (ideally) lashes makes a world of difference.
also hope that you are able to carve out more rest and you-time soon 💐

Great thread!

What retinol would people recommend? Does it really make much difference? I’m “suddenly 50” and my skin has got old very quickly.

Thanks for your reply 😊 about to demonstrate my cluelessness - but what's a "finishing powder" and is there a specific brand you'd suggest? Do you need to match it to skin tone?

I agree that improving my eyebrows would help the situation - for those suggesting tinting/shaping etc.- my worry is that although my eyebrows are dark they are thinning with age I think 🤦‍♀️ so does this require something different to tinting? I'm imagining there's no point tinting something that's not there?!

make sure eyebrows are neat if possible get them done professionally (i thought mine were great but had them done and it made a world of difference)
products:
ultrasun tinted (help from sun damage and actually makes my face with large pores look normal)
BLUSHER
Bit of smudged black eyeliner or mascara

Following! I’m supposed to be professional these days and I feel like I never quite hit it.

For those asking-
I have dark brown hair and eyebrows. Skin has a very slight olive complexion- freckles (which I'm not bothered about) and pretty "good" skin in the sense it's basically blemish free. But "bad" in the sense that it has lines/wrinkles and is just tired looking (hard to explain!) with bags under the eyes

You can get a month free on skin and me. Easy to cancel if you don’t like it. Has worked wonders for me.

I like the sound of this as it's not too intimidating as a non make up user! Are there any specific brands you'd suggest for the bronzer? And how is it used? On specific parts of the face or all over?

Sorry just re looked at your message and you'd already suggested a brand 🤦‍♀️