Rock bottom and lost my style

[StellaGibson2022]

Hello,

so am currently going through a really rubbish time mentally and oddly part of this is about how I look, dress and feel.

Ive no idea what suits me anymore (pandemic weight gain) so don’t know where to start.

Im a 16 bottom and 14 top
but cannot find jeans for love nor money as I hate my body so much. To make matters worse I am only 5’1’’.

prior to the pandemic I used to wear skinnies with trainers/boots, cute dresses and office wear with heels.

Where does one start with a wardrobe make over, ideally along the 33 items way of dressing. I keep buying stuff online, wearing once.

Its really making me feel rubbish, frumpy, and in itself is demotivating (when what I need is to be motivated!)

Black is your friend for now, black leggings, black everything. Then set to work on your mindset. You’ve got to style and love yourself inside before focusing on the outside. You’re overcompensating by buying clothes when you don’t really know what you want to look like. Small steps OP.

That’s an excellent idea to just buy black for now. Make an effort with your hair (keratin blowdry, colour, whatever you need) because that will help.

Start a Pinterest board of outfits you like on other people. Just keep pinning. when a theme emerges (long wool coats; bright silk shirts or whatever) then use that as a basis for your style.

Thank you for the suggestions!

Have a look at the Princessing threads - its a rubbish name (IMO) for a great concept.

The idea is that each day you do something small that over time will make a difference (drink an extra pint of water, face mask while watching telly, deep condition hair, etc)

It definitely helps with the ‘urgh’ mindset and shift it to more of a self-care / self-respect thing

On the clothes front, sticking to one colour is a great idea. Black makes me look like the living dead, so for me it would be navy or chocolate brown, but if black suits you, go for it.

One trick that can help when looking for new clothes is to think of at least 3 items that you could wear it with, and also 3 real life situations where you could wear it. That helps avoid the ‘wardrobe full of X clothes but no X to go to’ problem (X could be parties, office, whatever)

Finally, Vinted is your friend if you want to get new-to-you stuff on the cheap and possibly shift some of your unworn and unsuitable items too.

Thank you! I do like Vinted so will have a look. I’ve seen the princessing threads but was never sure about them - will go and have a nosy.

If just one colour is too restrictive, then how about 2 complementary ones, eg black/cream or navy/white. As long as everything you buy will go colour-wise with everything else.
Also a good idea to only buy in person after trying on, if possible, as that way there's more chance of avoiding impulse purchases. Avoid too anything remotely uncomfortable, however good it may look. If you're already feeling self-conscious, the last thing you need is clothes that repeatedly draw your attention back to their fit, cut etc.
Good luck!