lunch outfit - fat, frumpy 55

[vivariumvivariumsvivaria]

I am invited to a Big Deal Lunch which is a networking dream. It is hosted in a wealthy entrepreneur's home, catered and schmoozy.

I am middle aged, size 18, 5'5" and at the top of my career but a suit won't be right for this.

I showed my friend my outfit - A line wool sleeveless dress, tailored cardigan and knee length boots. She said I looked like a midwife. I'm not sure how many midwives she has seen, bet they'd disagree, but she meant my outfit is frumpy.

What would you wear to an event like this?

My outfit choice for this sort of thing would be a wrap or shirt dress in a rich jewel tone of some kind, opaque tights, ankle boots or heels, neutral handbag, and burgundy or oxblood nails and neat makeup (copper/gold toned neutrals and a nice lipstick in a classic colour). I have dark hair and am similar height/weight.

@Doliveira NAIL VARNISH! Oh good grief. Yes, hadn't thought about that. I have short stubby nails and a decent tache and eyebrows that have evaporated and need dying - totally forgot. Thank you, I'll make time for that tomorrow.

Hair's ok, cut 3 weeks ago, and the style is good. I've barely any grey at all, so I'd always had long hair because it's dark and shiny with a curl and doesn't need dyeing (I might be fat with magnificent facial hair but my hair is 30 years younger than the rest of me). It's thinning though, so long was frumpy. Went to a new hairdresser and said "crop it, funk it up" and she refused because she could tell I was not going to spend 45 minutes a day styling it. She cut it with the curl and it's easy to style and looks great - so I am never leaving this hairdresser.

Industry - I work in public health. This lunch is more people who work in and fund the Arts - if the Wellcome Trust was a person they'd fit in, using the arts for public engagement in health messaging.

I've got a passion project I've been working on for a long time and I need advice about what to do with it - set it up as a charity or turn it into a business.

Which is why I am, unusually, nervous. I suspect this lunch with people who know how to, and want to, get things done.

Maybe having a badly judged cardigan to blame would be useful for when I muck it up.

Be very careful no one nicks your idea if it could be a business. Just saying.

Thanks, Mosaic - that is a challenge, for sure. I think it's ok, it's quite niche but has potential. I don't think anyone could do it without me, but, I can't do it alone. Frustrating.

I don't have a business background so I need advice, and ideally someone to collaborate with who does understand business. I also don't understand 3rd sector, so, I'm a bit stuck.

I think the white company have some exceptionally chic choices this year. Wearing pointed kitten heels is always stylish with matching clutch.

You must book a blow dry, amazing hair can carry almost anything
Nails must be neat and polished
Think carefully about your make up and go for balance
A subtle tinted day cream looks good in the winter
A pashmina always elevates
Remember to walk in with confidence!

I'm thinking you might be better talking it over with some kind of specialised accountant or lawyer if you can find the right person. They have to abide by their client's confidentiality so you need have no fear.

Sorry I'm a cynic.

Blow dry is a great idea, @Venetiaparties

@Mosaic123 - yes, thank you, you make a good point. I did speak to the government start up scheme, Business Gateway a while ago.

I am good at recognising my lacks - and business skills is one of them. I started doing their webinars, but then got a new contract and was too busy to keep at it - really the webinars highlighted that I am so ignorant of the basics that it would be much better to find someone to collaborate with.

I'll message the woman who helped me at Business Gateway tomorrow. I lack the skills to even make a realistic business plan. The gap I have noticed is important and potentially lucrative - and it's only because of my odd skill set that I know how to fix it. Websites, social media, costings and funding...not so much.