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Original poster

Tight clothes without a flat stomach

52 replies

Suseal · 29/11/2022 06:12

Bare with me, I know this is a weird question, hence why I can't ask anyone irl. It's my own messed up thinking and not a great relationship with food and self image.

My whole life I've been a size 8 with a completely flat stomach. I'm
in my 40's and now a 10, so still slim but my stomach is a bit rounded, definitely no longer flat. No matter how hard I try the shape won't change, so I'm just trying to get used to the new shape and come to terms with how my body has changed.

Does it look ok to wear a tight fitting dress, so that from the side you can see my stomach curves? It's so ingrained in me that it should be flat, but I don't think it does, does it?

I have a dress I really want to wear to the Christmas party but I need to get past this to wear it.

OP posts:
Branster · 29/11/2022 06:21

It depends how much it bothers you.
Don't worry about what others think.

Would one of those Spanx undergarments make a visible difference to you? Maybe try that if you are wearing the dress for one occasion? I'm not sure how comfortable it would be. And avoid coffee or any bloating food/drinks for a couple of days prior to the event, as it might help.
I suspect that you would enjoy wearing the dress and it is probably flattering on you in other ways. There's a lot to be said about wearing something you feel good in. So I'd say wear it and don't worry about this one detail.

If this is an every day dress, it might annoy you too much because it would be difficult to maintain an illusion of a flatter stomach on a regular basis.

thedevilinablackdress · 29/11/2022 07:21

Yes it is totally fine. Curves are part of a normal human body. Wear the lovely dress and think no more of it.

Yepy · 29/11/2022 07:24

I actually think curves add interest and help an outfit to hang better, but that’s just me.

TheEvening · 29/11/2022 07:28

I completely get where you're coming from.

For me it is my c section scar/overhang. I've lost the baby weight and feel quite good/slim most of the time but I can't change that bit of my stomach. I love close-fitting dresses and have slim hips so they suit my body shape, but I'm now too self conscious. I wear a lot more loose tops etc nowadays.

For what it's worth I think a size 10 with a slightly rounded tummy sounds beautiful and perfect!

purpleme12 · 29/11/2022 07:30

Do you have a picture?
It's very hard to tell from the post.
Tummies can be not flat but not big either and we don't know if your tummy is an ok size and you're being critical because you're you.

Allsnotwell · 29/11/2022 07:33

I think clothes always come down to confidence. If you like it wear it!

We all have stomachs and it never seems to bother most woman because that’s just nature.

My stomach is rounded but I prefer loose dresses - just more comfortable rather than hiding it!

miffmufferedmoof · 29/11/2022 07:40

A rounded stomach in a tight dress is perfectly normal and fine OP. Enjoy your party

Original poster
Suseal · 29/11/2022 07:47

Dress is too tight for sucky in underwear, the seams would be visible.

Your replies have made me well up thank you. Not sure I'm brave enough to post a photo. Will do another try on tonight.

Thank you.

OP posts:
xJ0y · 29/11/2022 07:50

I agree, a tiny tummy doesn't "ruin" the look.

PilatesPeach · 29/11/2022 07:57

Life is too short OP - wear what you want, hold your head high and enjoy yourself. Everyone has bits of their bodies that can feel unattractive and no one else cares honestly - love yourself and your body

Pancakeorcrepe · 29/11/2022 17:24

A rounded stomach can look very cute! Go for it!

Original poster
Suseal · 29/11/2022 19:08

Here's my issue. It's just very different from what's always been there.

Tight clothes without a flat stomach
OP posts:
Justthisonce12 · 29/11/2022 19:13

Once youve had kids it never goes, it doesnt matter it really doesnt

SparkyBlue · 29/11/2022 19:19

OP this is the first year I've embraced my shape. Like you I was always in good shape and never had to worry about my belly but after three children and peri menopausal I've decided to embrace things. I'm still a 10/12 and fairly fit and healthy but the tummy area is definitely nothing like it used to be. I've worn a few fitted things this year I got a lovely midi knitted dress that I am planning on wearing to the theatre on Friday and I'm not going to let myself be bothered by not being "perfect"

F4chrissakes · 29/11/2022 19:21

Was going to ask if it was a curve or what I have - a gut. Seeing the picture, you have a neat little curve. Stop worrying and enjoy wearing your dress!

Justtheonethanks9099 · 29/11/2022 19:26

Looks good to me.
But...if you want to draw the eye upwards, wear a big necklace/choker or big earrings!

holierthanthou73 · 29/11/2022 19:32

You look lovely

username98765 · 29/11/2022 19:35

I used to feel like this all the time. Now I've realised it's mainly in my head! No one is going to be looking at you from that angle so honest do not worry. To me it just looks normal. Considering the average size in the uk is 16 I really don't think you have anything to worry about. Wear the dress and enjoy yourself x

Original poster
Suseal · 29/11/2022 19:48

Thank you all. That's a good point actually, people won't be looking from that angle and if they are, I guess they would naturally look more towards your face (not great either 😂).

Thank you, I think I can do this!

OP posts:
Sweetpea1532 · 29/11/2022 19:50

@Suseal your dress fits you perfectly and is very flattering in my opinion!
I, too, always had a flat stomach with a gigantic bubble butt so I can understand how you might not be comfortable now that you may feel one of your 'best" features has changed....but the general population isn't shaped this way...they have and have always had a rounded stomach no matter how slim they were and are.

In other words, you will probably have the flattest stomach of the majority of people your same age because of body shape.
Please embrace your beautiful shape and have a great time.

Also, how many people are really going to be seeing this side view of you? You will probably be talking with people face-on.Flowers

Original poster
Suseal · 29/11/2022 20:02

Thank you all so much for taking the time to make a stranger feel better about herself. It's really appreciated and really helping me accept things and see it from a different way.

OP posts:
PinkArt · 29/11/2022 20:26

I can't begin to imagine having a tummy that flat. Wear the dress!

FridayNightIsWineNight · 29/11/2022 20:52

I say wear the lovely dress. I have a very similar rounded tummy as you. I'm similar in age and I've chosen a dress this year which I think shows it. I then realised I still look bloody good for my age and it's normal to have a bit of a tummy.
a very good person once told me - you must always wear the dress, never let the dress wear you, ie wear it with confidence! You'll look fabulous!

Passthecheeseboard · 30/11/2022 02:46

Doesn’t look too bad to me, maybe get some no vlp shapewear underwear so you don’t see the seams it it would help you be more confident? … nothing worse than feeling self conscious while trying to enjoy a night out

GLADragss · 30/11/2022 03:05

Honestly I’ve been slim my entire life and have a bit of a belly now. I’m actively losing the weight I’ve gained as I prefer being slim. But the weight gain has made me notice other women more, I’d say the majority of the uk public do NOT have flat stomach’s. They are still attractive and have normal lives etc so don’t put too much pressure on yourself

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